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This review is from: No Bra Required! (Kindle Edition)
I could have finished this review just with the title, but Amazon insists on more.
Let's start with the basics: Poor grammar and even worse punctuation. This book has obviously never been near an editor. What is ironic about this is that the protagonist, Lucy, is supposed to be a teacher. I'm glad she's not teaching my children.
The language is stilted, more suited to a GCSE student than an author, and the dialogue is clunky to say the least. Characters are poorly drawn, and too much time is spent on character sketches instead of letting the characters develop and tell their own stories. There's a lot of blushing and giggling and secret smiling. It gets tedious very quickly.
In terms of a plot, well, there just isn't one. I think its supposed to be a rom com, but there's no way of knowing. Nothing happens and it takes a very long time not to happen. There's no drama, no confrontation, no action, nothing at all to capture the reader's imagination and make them interested in what's happening between Lucy and the man she has a crush on, Ed the doctor (cliche or what?). Marriage break ups are tragic for those involved, but for the rest of us they're boring and if that's the basis of the story then it has to be spiced up with revenge, conflict, passion or drama. We get none of these things.
If this book was in colour it would be 'my-little-pony' pink with lots of sun beams and a rainbow drawn in primary colours. It just isn't adult literature.
I got as far as the end of chapter 9, about a third of the way through, before giving up. Perhaps it got better, but I doubt it very much. Steer well clear. And Nikki - I would recommend a creative writing course before you try again.
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Showing 1-4 of 4 posts in this discussion
Initial post: 11 Mar 2014, 21:46:51 GMT
Not sure how you can comment on characters and plot when you only got to chapter 9 as the story is just unfolding then. Also quite a rude comment to the author.
Posted on 14 Mar 2014, 15:27:45 GMT
Cheryl Reid says:
What a rude comment, glad to see that I and many others completely disagree with you! I'm looking forward to Nikki Ashton's next book.
Posted on 23 Apr 2016, 11:21:56 BST
[Deleted by Amazon on 24 Apr 2016, 09:51:13 BST]
Posted on 24 Apr 2016, 16:04:43 BST
Last edited by the author on 24 Apr 2016, 16:06:47 BST
J. P. Martinez says:
Well, I did read the whole thing and I fully agree with Camembaert's comments. Both the grammar and punctuation are in desperate need of a proof reader's or editor's touch. The formatting is inconsistent, with protracted indents ruining the flow of the text. The lust/love scenes read like something written by, or for, teenagers. And once you know that Ed has a twin brother you can work out the plot twist(s). All in all, this book shows why self-publishing is not a great idea
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