Top critical review
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cognitive psych approach
on 2 September 2011
Under the guise of scientific research, this book recommends that couples develop certain attitudes - cognitive styles - that will improve interactions. This is more important, the author asserts, than trying to resolve the issues that are discussed, debated, and argued about. In other words, he argues that it is far more important to be nice, to avoid being defensive or sarcastic, to avoid stonewalling and the like.
While this may well be an important insight and may predict the prospects of couples facing divorce, I believe that the issues matter in marriages and thus that this advice only gets a couple in trouble part way there. THere are also exercises, in which couples can check their cognitive styles and try to adjust them.
REcommended with these limits in mind.