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on 2 September 2010
The famous Civil Servant sat at his computer typing. His wife entered, gazing in awe at his finely toned figure.
"What are you doing?" she questioned?
"I'm writing a review of the Da Vinci Code' he replied. "As you know, it was published in 1997, the year that the Vatican assassinated Stephen Hawking for questioning whether or not the world was round"
"Is this the Da Vinci Code that was the very exciting thriller?"
"Or so it is believed" replied the famous civil servant "but take a look at this". He handed her a large illustrated tomb entitled 'The Da Vinci Code'
His wife gazed at the book and the writing, and then suddenly gasped aloud
"But...but it's just a load of poorly put together sentences, two dimensional characters and obvious plot twists, mainly narrated by the clean cut hero in a patronising manner to his female assistant? How could Dan Brown ever hope to make this a best seller?"
"That is the cunning part" replied the increasingly handsome and clever civil servant. "In order for Dan Brown to be proclaimed saviour of the thriller novel, he had to be made to look controversial. So he chucked in a load of nonsense that he vaguely remembered from reading The Holy Blood and the Holy Grail so that his novel would seem subversive and sticking it to the man (or god). Then he put in an introduction stating that all the facts were true so people thought they were actually learning something new. And because the novel is attacking organised religion, anyone who criticised the book could be seen to be an agent of the church"

Meanwhile, 300 miles away, the hunchbacked crippled albino.....
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on 16 May 2005
Regardless of what the others have written, I thought this book was great!! It is far more believable that the rubbish we were subjected to at school in RE!
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on 15 March 2004
I loved this book. I read the whole thing on a Sunday, as it was pouring with rain and I fancied passing the time reading.
Which is where I think a lot of people seem to be missing the point. Although the author says at the beginning that there are a few definite facts in the book, he doesn't actually say the whole book is truth! It is ficiton after all.
One of the great things about reading a good book is that you can get lost in a completely different world. This book does that beautifully. It makes suggestions that makes you think but of course no body is claiming we should believe them.
Every chapter ends on a cliff hanger, meaning it is completely unputdownable. Famous landmarks are described in a way that makes you seee them from a different light. The suspense is maintained throughout. It is a fantastic journey, described in immense detail.
I think people who like to pick holes in a subject and find the flaws won't enjoy this book - but maybe they should stick to non fiction anyway. The book is a grown-up Harry Potter, designed to allow you to lose yourself in another world for a few hours.
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on 13 June 2013
I read this a long time ago now, after many a book and many a book since, It's still one of my favourites. It's sparked debate and Passion with friends and family and I've recommended it to EVERYONE! It took me 3 months to get through the first boring chapter, I couldn't understand the hype... then it got going and I could not put it down for a second! The film was awful... read the book! Immense!
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on 4 May 2005
Worth a read but not essential to buy - good story that keeps you interested till the end, but it is really rather badly written.
Fun but nowhere near as good as its made out to be.
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on 2 September 2005
i had doubts about this book as i had heard mixed reviews from friends about it but i decided to go for it. This book is one of the best i have read this year. it is packed with cliffhangers and action! i can see why people have described it as controversial but if you want an exciting book that you cant put down......i can only recomend this!
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on 30 December 2007
This is a fantastic book which is impossible to put down. Ten times better than the film, its impossible not to be obsessed with
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on 4 January 2005
Very hard to put down. But also really badly written, predictable, and disappointing, partly in that so many of the supposedly fiendishly difficult clues are incredibly babyish and easy to crack. And the theology in the book is all over the place: it's like he got his info from the loonier conspiracy theory groups on the net. Despite all of that, it's a real page-turner. The only worrying thing about it is that some remarkably unintelligent people seem to have decided that The Da Vinci Code is a scholarly piece of research, rather than a better-than-average airport thriller...
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on 8 February 2005
It has been claimed that a room full of monkeys randomly hammering away on typewriters will eventually replicate the complete works of Shakespeare. This must be a sample of the drivel that they've been producing in the meantime, and has presumably been released to keep them in bananas.
Where to begin? Characterisation? What characterisation? I've read bank statements with more character development. The academic/adventure who isn't anything like Indiana Jones, honest. The Eccentric English aristocrat. The unorthodox cop who bends the rules. The French bint who's so enamoured of our hero that by the end of the book (12 hours or so after they've met) she's ready to hop into the sack with him.
The "author's" favourite device for plot advancement seems to be a) hero is set some tricky puzzle; b) hero doesn't know the answer to the tricky puzzle (although any reader with an IQ above that of the average brillo pad will probably have figured it out already - I mean a supposed expert on Leonardo not figuring out that a clue is written in mirror-image, honestly!); c) chapter ends; d) hero suddenly figures out the answer at the beginning of the next chapter.
The author appears to be labouring under some appalling misconceptions, for example he apparently believes that US citizens accused of committing crimes in France will be rescued by the US embassy; that British knights of the realm are given embossed cards which makes them virtually above the law (maybe he should have asked Lord Archer about that one); that a French policeman could fly to the UK and start running an investigation here, and have British police deferring to him immediately.
Brown/The Monkey Collective drop in pages of obscure "fact" every now and again to give a scholarly/factual feel. Instead of regurgitating some of this bilge (for example the Priory of Scion is not the thousand year old secret society as claimed but was dreamt up as a prank in the 1960s) it would have been more productive for the author to use his encyclopaedia/internet search engine, or whatever else constituted his research, to more accurately research some of the background facts that can be verified; from what he has written I'd be very surprised if he'd ever visited either Paris or London.
I won't waste any more time by complaining about the "surprising plot twist", or the cop-out ending.
There is the basis of a fine novel in the mumbo-jumbo surrounding the grail, the Templars, and secret societies, and it's called Foucalt's Pendulum by Umberto Eco.
Poorly researched, poorly plotted, poorly written, those monkeys must try harder!
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on 3 December 2005
I bought this because, as Anthony Blanche in Brideshead Revisited says, "..it's so banal saying you haven't read the book of the moment if you haven't actually read it".
All in all it came up to expectations - i.e not much good.
I wish I'd written it though! I'd like to have all the royalties in my bank account!
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