on 26 April 2011
As a newly diagnosed "Aspergirl", I have acquired several books on the subject over the last few weeks. To put it simply, the other books have simply "rattled the locks" on the "Asperger Box". This book however has literally "blown the lid off".
I have ordered a further copy to loan out to family and friends, as well as "Asperger's on the Job" - another title by the same author. I particularly like the interviews with other Aspergirls, and in some cases their partners, and also the explanations of some of the more unusual "behaviours". The author also compares the differences between males and females with Asperger's Syndrome. It's nice to know that I'm not alone.
I am currently using the book to help me "find the right words" for a website I am creating.
I would recommend this book to anyone who is associated in any way with an Aspergirl.
This is one of the best books about girls and women on the autism/Asperger's spectrum that I have EVER read! No parent, educator or medical professional should be without this gem. Women and girls on the spectrum will certainly recognize themselves in this stellar masterpiece of a book. It is very empowering!
If you are a girl or woman on the spectrum, this book is truly your best friend. Rudy Simone, like Dr. Travis Thompson and Dr. Tony Attwood is the voice of tolerance and understanding in re the a/A experience. She really "gets" it!
I like the way she replaces harmful verbiage such as "stimming," which is a term I never liked either with the more tolerant and much more accurate term "soothing" behaviors. She dislikes the term "stimming" because to her it sounds "creepy." I dislike it because I think it trivializes or downplays the need to release excess tension when sensory input gets to be too much. After all, the neurotypical (NT) population "stims," by tapping and jingling things in their pockets and fidgeting, just to name a few.
Rudy Simone is a genius. It is as simple as that. She has interviewed women on the spectrum and included their thoughts in this masterpiece of a book. Liane Holliday Willey wrote the foreword and she has Asperger's and her daughter does as well.
Rudy Simone outlines critical points throught one's life, from birth to senior citizenship with Asperger's. She outlines with clearly written, easy to follow lists of key bullet items that help direct readers' focus on Aspergerian behaviors, reasons for same and mechanisms for coping. Each chapter closes with Advice to Parents and Advice to Aspergirls. I like the new terminology - Aspergirls. Liane Holliday Willey's daughter said it sounded like a superhero and she is right. I think we should get into raising our glasses and proposing a toast to Rudy Simone!
I strongly urge everyone to read this book and I would like to give people extra copies of it. It has truly been a major help to me personally and for that, I say a heartfelt "THANK YOU, RUDY SIMONE!"
on 13 August 2010
As the mother of a daughter diagnosed only two years ago at the age of 17 with Aspergers this book provided me with more information than I have been able to find anywhere else. I bought it primarily for my daughter to read, but both my husband and I have also now read it and think that everyone who has any contact with a female with Aspergers should read it. By reading this book you gain so much more understanding of what an Aspie girl is going through and how to help them - when they need help or will accept it! If you know any female Aspie I can't recommend this book highly enough - and even if you don't know someone with it, still read it and then when you come across an Aspie you will understand why they are like they are.
on 6 May 2014
I was given this to read while waiting for a referral to the adult diagnosis unit. And it's the standard Asperger's description but the book does not touch in any way on the severe issues that autism can create in women - eating disorders, self harm, abusive relationships, and addiction. This book makes feeling like an alien too whimsical and charming. But the reality of trying to find coping strategies with no diagnosis has left a lot of intelligent women very damaged.
on 11 January 2012
I didn't realise until I read this book that girls are less liable to be diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome than boys. It affects them in different ways and they cope with it differently. This is a brilliant book for an Aspergirl, their parents or people working with them - it covers early life, the teenage years, college, work, romance, marriage, friendships, meltdowns, misunderstandings. Basically anything you wanted to know you'll find someone who has experienced it in this book
on 6 February 2014
There is useful info in here to look further into (which is why I have given it 3 stars and would recommend it for that reason).
Onto the negative in my opinion:
At the beginning of the book she does specify the fact that everyone is different and not all will experience all of these things, however she then continues to use the pronoun ‘we’ continuously. This can’t help but read like she’s severely overgeneralising and gives the wrong impression if you forget what she mentioned at the beginning. Even if you do remember it, it feels confusing to me. I am guessing she used ‘we’ to attempt to help with empowerment, to help 'aspergirls' feel they belong to a group who share similar differences, to contrast with most of their lives where they have probably felt very alone in their differences. However in my opinion the book would be more empowering, read less cheesy, less patronising, more accurately, more consistently with her beginning assurances, less giving the wrong impression, if it was written in the third person and more formally (with references to help people do further research into her ideas). Also, to me personally at least, I’m not sure seeing ourselves as ‘we’ and ‘them’ is helpful. I feel like my individuality in personality regardless of possible Asperger's (I am not diagnosed but need to be assessed as I struggle so much with these symptoms), is squashed with the tone of this book. Despite her inclusion of such quotes as the below:
P21 “I do not mean to say that we are all blindingly smart; if you are an Aspergirl without a “zone passion”, and you have no savant skill, you are not alone. “What really makes me uncomfortable is when Aspie campaigners couch that “leave us alone” argument in the myth that all AS people are super intelligent mathematician science savants and some sort of master race. That makes me feel, as an Aspie who doesn’t have any of that, I’m a double fail – I fail at being normal, and also fail at being AS.” (Polly).
- I feel like these quotes aren’t enough to override the fact that the book then goes on to do exactly that: stereotype with ‘we’, which makes me uncomfortable and I think could actually feel alienating to some, which I gather was the opposite of the author’s intention. For example:
P31 ‘Alone, we are talented, graceful, witty, and smart…’
- I know this was meant to read as empowering, but to suggest every Aspergirl is talented, graceful, witty and smart, I think would make anyone who isn’t those things feel sad. I also find it patronising, as no I am not all of those things, but I think the message should be ‘it’s okay to not be all of those things, we aren't all that similar as we are all unique’, rather than having the patronising insistence that ‘we’ are so smart and brilliant, which sounds a bit big-headed. I think it is also rather subjective whether someone is ‘witty’ :P
on 26 February 2016
I bought this book because most of the ones about Asperger's syndrome that I've read didn't really go into how girls are affect by it. As someone with Aspergers I was interested in what it had to say but I found most of the book weren't really relevant to me. Sure there were parts that would have been helpful to me when I was younger.
Unfortunately, I was diagnosed when I'd been through school and university. There was a lot of advice that I would have taken on board such as choosing the right course to study and finding the right career for me.
I liked some of the other chapters such as about about friendships and relationships. They were helpful and I could relate a lot to some of what the people in this book had said because I have had similar experiences. I couldn't say that I had a temper meltdown or stomach issues such as this book covers.
Even though this book weren't relevant to me, I can see that it would be very helpful for a parent of a girl who has Aspergers. It would also be good for someone who wants to understand a bit more about Asperger's syndrome.
on 28 November 2013
I was recommended this book from an aspergers website and I was very reluctant to read it at first, I had read other books about Aspergers and had always felt like they were explaining it in a very...'clinical' and 'detached' way which made it impossible to connect with the writer and draw any helpful information from them except the simple facts. However when I actually received the book and decided to have a quick glance at the pages, I realized that it's completely different and actually offers practical advice for situations that you will probably face in life as well as testimonies from other 'Aspergirls' who are suffering through the same issues or have found solutions to make those issues easier. I found myself immersed into the book and smiled whenever I spotted a sentence or paragraph which seemed to explain 'me' better than I could myself, either because I just didn't know how to explain it or didn't realize that it was a normal thing within Aspergers. It also helps you to feel that you aren't alone, and I would highly, highly recommend it to another other 'Aspergirls', parents, teachers or even friends who want to know more about the kind of issues that someone will Aspergers may face on a daily basis.
I also love the term 'Aspergirls', it is certainly empowering! :)
on 5 May 2012
Very well written and an amazing insight as to how Aspergers affects not only the person with it, but their surrounding family/friends. This book should be compulsory in schools. I have a 16 year old daughter who has only just been diagnosed after years of being snubbed and disbelieved by a Psychiatrist and Paediatrician. After demanding a second opinion, she was finally told she has Aspergers by a Clinical Psychologist. I knew all along this was the case. She was bullied at school and has not been in Education for the last two years as she could not cope at all. This book has helped her enormously and made her realise she is not a "freak" (as told by her peers)and that she is allowed to be herself and should be proud of who she is. The book is very positive and tells the reader that Aspergers does not mean the end of your life. You can achieve and it is helping my daughter to believe this. She had given up on any hope of a future until she read this. If you or anyone you know has (or thinks they may have) Aspergers, please get this book. It's a Godsend. Thank you Rudy Simone.