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on 19 June 2017
A beautifully written depiction of her descent to hell, Dawn schiller's tale of her harrowing journey with John Holmes is so particularly sad set against the seemingly loving and romantic start. I intend to find the film version to watch too.
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on 25 December 2011
I will presume this book will be read by people who have either seen the excellant Val Kilmer film account of John Holmes involvement or not depending upon your view, in the Wonderland murders or people who have a general interest in the life and times of "The king of pornography" John Holmes.
This is not a book one just stumbles across. John Holmes not withstanding this book focusess more on his long time gilfriend the teenager he so callously abused Dawn Schiller.
Dawn survived both the Wonderland murders, the evil nightclub owner and mass murderer Eddie Nash and ultimately John Holmes and went on to make a life for herself and to change the lives of others who may be caught up in the same life.
It is hard hitting and certainly will make you think a lot less of John, in the movie he was portrayed as a hapless cocaine head who stumbled from one situation to another without really meaning any harm, more like a bumbling idiot than the reality. He was no bumbling fool he was a vindictive callous self centered evil man who tried to destroy anyone who stopped him getting what he wanted.
This book is an essential read for anyone who may look at the Porn King with rose colured glasses as I did. I remember John Holmes through sneaking looks at my fathers collection of VHS tapes of John Holmes in the late 70's early 80's. As a teenage boy this man left an impression upon me as a man that had it all. Fame, fortune, "a very large part" in porn movies what teenage boy wouldn't be impressed with all this.
The reality however was much different and although the film Wonderland which in itself is an essential view for any holmes 'fan' this book expoldes the myth once and for all. If you have any interest in John holmes then you need to read this.
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on 8 November 2010
This is an amazing account of Dawn Schillers life.If you have seen the film Wonderland starring Val Kilmer,Wonderland [2003] [DVD] then you will know a slightly sanitised version. In this book, you get the reality. From being groomed and mentally and physically abused as a teenager by a porn star, to her knowledge of the Wonderland murders, to her amazing recovery and then to her subsequent life of help for other unforunate teenagers, this is such a compelling read. I will not let this book out of my possession. It is such a good read written by an amazing woman of our times.
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on 21 August 2011
This book is a fascinating insight into Dawn Schiller's life. Although John Holmes 'groomed' Dawn since she was only 15, I still couldn't imagine that he could be cruel to her because he seemed to love and care for her so much (at first). When John Holmes turns to drugs, it is harrowing to read of the depths he goes to, what he puts Dawn through and the disrespect for life that he has.

I feel strengthened after reading this book because although I've never encountered anything similar, it is inspiring to read about the hell that Dawn went through and then to come out of it stronger.
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on 5 October 2012
This book had me hooked.... I love a 'true life' book and what Dawn went through is truly horrific. That so many people, deep down, knew of her relationship with John and allowed it to continue, despite her age only makes it sadder.
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on 27 February 2013
You actually 'live' this book as you are reading it; from falling in love with John to wanting to escape his brutality. Brilliantly written and a 'must read'!
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on 25 February 2013
Fascinating read really couldn't put it down , if you liked the wonderland movie then you would like this more
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on 17 December 2013
A wonderfully written memoir which kept me hooked from the beginning. How dawn survived is amazing. A real eye opening experience of a young girl and a two bit porn star hooked on drugs and violence that came to a sticky end.
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on 19 February 2015
Good insight of the real John holmes unbelievable some of the vile things he did. Could not put it down
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on 11 November 2014
A bit slow to start but then couldn't put it down its well worth it when you get into the story
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