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on 11 July 2013
Pros- gives some good examples of how to deal with difficult circumstances, e.g. A friend's announcement. Spells out loud and clearly what you're going through and stresses all these horrible feelings are normal. Interesting case studies.

Cons- I didn't like this book. I gave it 3 stars and no less as some people, looking at the reviews, will definitely benefit from the information and 'coping tools'. Most of the chapters I enjoyed, however, I didn't feel confident after reading it. I also was no where near ready to read the adoption chapter. Each time I read this book I ended up in tears and my confidence and mood levels were reduced dramatically. I bought the relaxation cd from the Domar website. I didn't find that particularly good either.

All the reviews seem very genuine and each person is on a different journey, with their own ups and downs. I am just starting ivf and after reading this book I feel it's quite pointless. I would recommend the books by Julia Indichova in its place, they can be a bit airy fairy, but, really give hope.
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on 1 December 2012
I am so glad I found this book. Its just what I needed after failed ivf to give me strength to carry on. Its great to know I am not alone and how I feel is normal.
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on 3 July 2007
Just like the title says - a must read. This book described exactly how I have felt for years but, better still, told me how to feel better. I read it in 2 days and immediately started to feel stronger. It has changed my view of how to deal with infertility.
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on 2 August 2013
This book was recommended to me and iam really happy with it. It has breathing exercises to calm down which I have found very helpful. Its nice to pick up and read a chapter when I need too and its a good companion when the process of iui or ivf can be upsetting and lonely.
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on 30 August 2012
This book is an excellent resource for anyone going through the painful experience of fertility challenges. It is also an excellent guide for those who know someone having fertility difficulties.
In this book Dr. Domar sensitively and openly addresses the challenges women face when they cannot get pregnant , from relaxation techniques to mindful thinking , from how to get through the working day to how to deal with insensitive comments.
This book reveals that you are not the only one going through fertility challenges, that you are not the only one who " thinks those thoughts" and that you can get your life back.
This book can change how you think .
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on 3 April 2013
PROS:
A really useful book with an empathetic tone that is full of practical and compassionate advice. I would thoroughly recommend it to anyone experiencing infertility at any stage in the process. The author has both personal and professional experience of infertility. She also makes it clear when what she is saying is backed up by research studies and what is her personal opinion, which I found very reassuring.

She introduces a "toolbox of coping skills", including relaxation and breathing techniques, meditation, mindfulness, guided imagery, autogenic training and yoga, as well as cognitive restructuring, journaling, self-nuture, and group support. I found this book helpful in two ways - practising some of the relaxation techniques and cognitive restructuring has been good at helping me feel a bit less stressed and reading through some of the chapters about different aspects of infertility (in particular relating to career, religion and adoption) has helped me gain a different perspective on how to deal with it and has made me feel much more positive and in control.

CONS (none of them bad enough to dock a star!):
This is an American book and the chapter on financial issues is geared up for the American health care system.
It is directed unashamedly at women, although lots of the content is still relevant to men.
I don't like the way the book markets itself. I really dislike the expression "Mind/Body Guide", which sounds horribly "new age", and I really dislike the way the book claims to "boost [infertile women's] chances of becoming pregnant". I don't think this is an appropriate way to sell this to women who are probably feeling pretty desperate. However, I'm really glad that I did buy it because the tone of the book is not like that at all.
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on 13 December 2015
Really helps you rationalise infertility thoughts and was a great help when I was struggling with it all
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on 21 July 2010
This book is great if you are like me and suffered 10 years at the hands of the misery of infertility.
This book makes you truly feel that somebody understands what you are going through and gives you a mind body, evidence based approach to regaining happiness. There is evidence that the techniques improve fertility treatment success rates, but the life skills taught by this book would enable you to continue your life happier than before even if success is still not achieved. There is evidence that the techniques also help a wide range of other chronic illnesses such as pain.

It is a must read. I am doing a course based on the work of Dr Domar right now and it is helping me to change my thinking. Without this book I would not have known what to do to help myself.
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on 16 May 2015
Thanks
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on 22 May 2011
I think the book is an excellent resource for anyone dealing with infertility and wondering how to survive this awful time. The book covers everything from how to manage your stress levels to what to tell your family and friends to how to make your finances go as far as possible to what to do when even IVF does not work. From several infertility self-help books I've read, this is the best one. Good luck!
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