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Customer Reviews

4.4 out of 5 stars
4.4 out of 5 stars
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on 7 January 2015
Fascinating book, would especially recommend it to future parents.
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on 3 April 2017
I warmly recommend it.
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on 6 August 2016
Thanks, perfect.
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on 6 August 2016
Thanks, perfect.
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on 28 February 2015
This book resonates with my belief that our experiences in childhood are paramount and leave deep impact on everything in our adult's life even though we don't realise it most times since we don't have conscious memories from the time when we were very small babies In a very simple and logical and yet holistic and knowledgeable way, Jean Liedloff develops this argument by drawing comparisons between our western culture and the Yequana people - an example of human species living in their natural habitat, uninfluenced by "modern" trends. She compares the people we produce in our society with the joyful members of the harmonious society of the Yequana and it all boils down to how babies and children are treated from birth here, in the "developed" world, and there, in the "primitive" jungle.
Like a typical mum-to-be of our age I had almost no practical knowledge on how to take care of a baby so I had to either go with the flow and listen to what the doctor says, what my family says, what more experienced friends say or try and learn for myself as much as I can by reading books and articles on the subject. I chose that latter and I kept reading and reading during pregnancy, than after my daughter was born. However, many authors and theories would contradict each other and very often the more I read, the more confusing things would become. Then, I found this book and it was the missing piece of the puzzle, the theory of everything. This book will not give you a practical advice on how to make your baby sleep through the night but will make you feel better when they don't. Furthermore, when things get really frustrating, it will take away the blame from you or your baby, because it is not your fault, and even less theirs, that we live in an environment that is not suitable for raising babies and does not meet babies' innate expectations of life outside the womb. However, we can at least be more respectful and understanding about infants' difficulties adapting to these inconvenient even sometimes hostile living conditions, and also try not to be too hard on ourselves while we try to do, very often alone or with the help of a partner only, what in a normal human society, is done by a whole tribe.
I am a person who has never believed that babies cries or toddler tantrums are to be considered normal, I have never accepted the usual explanations like colic or teething, not mentioning the view of the child as a tyrant who is just too spoiled and is on a quest to enslave you for life should you respond to their cry for help or attention. This book finally gave my a plausible explanation of all the difficulties and drama that many parents and children go through in our society. It also gave me some solutions and ideas on how to overcome some of the obstacles - it gave me the confidence to believe in my baby even more and to grant her the biggest gift ever- the freedom and trust from the people who mean the world to her at the moment - her parents, and to stop treating her like our helpless, fragile, dependent creation but like a complete and potent individual who just needs to be shown (not taught) how things work in our world. And the result and change in her behavior followed very soon and I couldn't be more grateful for this book. Thank you, Jean Liedloff!
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on 15 November 2013
I bought this for my son and daughter in law. Their son is one and a half. I read this book when my kids were young and used it as a guideline when bringing up my youngest (now 29). The ideas may sound a bit strange but they are based on Leidloffs experience as an anthropologist living amongst an Indian tribe and her observations of how they looked after their babies. We are more in tune these days anyway with the idea that we should respond to a baby's needs and I think many mothers carry their babies around with them when they are getting on with everyday stuff. But the basic idea is that if you give your babies and young children what they need, they won't become 'needy' as they grow up. In other words you can't 'spoil' them by giving them the love and attention they need. Leidloff is just saying what you know and feel is right really. I know it can't be held up as proof, but my son is the least needy person you could find. I know I'm probably biased, but ask anyone and they will agree!
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on 18 January 2017
The roots and forgotten basics of elements of a healthy upbringing of children, and the sources for a harmonious, natural life in general. Very recommended.
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on 20 December 2016
This book is on a course reading list so I was required to read it. Any respect I had for some of the authors ideas and research was lost with her offensive attitudes and opinions about homosexuality.
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on 24 November 2009
How I wish I had read this before I had my own child. I would unquestionably have tried out these revolutionary ap proaches. This is a book that every couple who is about to have a baby should read. Don't delay because it makes so much sense. I was able to lend a copy to a close friend just after she had given birth to her first child and she followed the advice in this book very carefully with highly benefical results. She has two children, a girl and a boy, both brought up with Liedloff's methods and they rarely cried, are very independent, confident and happy children. It goes to show that mother's down the ages don't necessarily know best!!!!!Liedloff has handed us the key to living in closer harmony with our children. Take them everywhere, let them feel when they are babies the warmth of their parents, the movement of being in the arms of their parents when they are walking, the confidence of knowing mum or dad is always around, sleep with them, cuddle them. Living in Italy as I do it is great to go out to restaurants at night and see the children all running round, not tucked up in boring old bed, but allowed to drop off when they want, secure in the knowledge that they are loved, wanted no matter where, no matter how because mum or dad's arms are only a few steps away.Let's break the conditioned mould and rethink all the ridiculous ways in which we have isolated our children in the past.Read Liedloff and it will change those old taboos for ever.
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on 26 April 1999
My husband and I read this book 9 years ago, before the birth of our son, and it spoke to our hearts. Employing the simple idea that a baby who starts life in the womb shouldn't be abruptly separated from the mother after birth, we maintained almost constant contact with him for the first few months. I was amazed at some of the resistance, resentment, even hostility, people sometimes demonstrated when informed that we slept with our newborn and never left him to cry. All their protests were based on nothing but groundless fears -- "You'll roll over and smother him! You'll 'spoil' him!" Etc. Well, he became naturally more and more independent and separate at his own pace, not an arbitrarily imposed one (that's the "continuum" part), and weaned himself from the breast at 11 months, rather than at a time decided by the "experts" or demands of employment. He is now 9 years old, and is a wonderful, happy, secure, well-adjusted boy, and I never cease getting compliments from everyone who meets him on how considerate, engaging, empathetic, kind, and well socialized he is. I credit Liedloff's book for all of this. If I could give one message to all would-be parents, I would say: Don't buy into the lie that material things are what's important to provide your child, and if you yourself are so wrapped up in financial gain that you won't temporarily sacrifice it to bond with him the first year of life, you're selling yourselves short. Invest the first 6 months to 1 year of his life raising him in your arms, and you will be giving him, and yourself, more than a billion dollars could ever buy.
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