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on 15 June 2010
A great book, plenty of scenarios with great verbal fixes that will allow you maintain a managerial control. Turn stalemate in to win-win, quash the big unruly personalities and massive egos, deal with the nasty. This book allows you maintain a bit of harmony in a tough workplace. Thumbs up!! Take a moment to read and reflect on the situations that might occur in your workplace. I recently started in a job where I "inherited" 8 HoD's, 3 of who previously "ran" the operation to their benefit and the detriment to many others. Happy to report this book gives you the nice edge with a no messing comeback. Well worth it!
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on 18 September 2010
Very useful product for dealing with the inevitable problems in the workplace. This book is easy and quick to read - no long-winded research data. Although easy to read it is still very useful and gives an interesting take on scenarios. Its well designed with chapters you can dip into for advice on appropriate language.
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on 5 December 2014
I highly recommend this book for all the wannabe corporate speakers out there. I've heard so much of this over the years: "Moving forward" blah blah blah. Don't the "bosses" realise the ridiculousness of such phrases yet? (How we laugh)
Page 47 however, is absolutely brilliant on How To Confront The Bully Boss eg starter phrase #1: (You say to your bully boss) "Comments like that are unproductive and do nothing but create bad feelings". If I ever hear anyone use that phrase at work I won't be able to contain myself! *dabs eyes*
On the humorous basis, I'd give this 5 stars ;o)
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on 26 August 2012
It's a rare occasion when I cannot persevere with a book but this book is the one. However, to be fair it's evidently aimed at the American market so if you're not American don't waste your time - I wish I hadnt!
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on 17 October 2013
The books does what it says on the tin. It gives advice on the choice of words when dealing with difficult situations. It pays to know yourself and your own personality and biases when dealing with others. But the advice can be tested and used a step at a time. I will try some that interest me.
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on 25 June 2009
Very practical book, easy to read. I have used some of the phrases at work, which given me the confidence that I can deal with tricky personalities.
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on 5 June 2013
The areas addressed make this book a useful and practical solution to many difficult situations. The content if quite comprehensive and can be dipped into for quick reference.
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on 24 December 2012
Good book for an office environement where you may be a Supervisor or manager of people in some way, some useful business phrases.
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on 5 October 2009
I've read of few books in this area.
This book is full of common sense phrases to use with difficult situations, but am I going to remember them all? ... not really. If you are the types of person who can remember hundreds of phrases - the buy this book.
For me though - this book doesn't really get to the root of why conflicts happen and how to solve them. I've read a couple of other books that have simple easy to remember theories that once you have read them give tips on how to recognise the different types of difficult people and how to handle them.
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on 26 June 2010
After studying human social interaction for quite some time, I thought it would be handy to look at some actual phrases to add to the equation when dealing with difficult people and get a jist of what it really takes to tackle those really difficult people. I was severely disappointed once I began reading this book. I felt that the book comes off the tracks from the start and never gets back on. I have really focused on dealing with difficult people in the last 2 years, part of the reason was so I could have a better relationship with my father. Where this book goes completely awry to start off with is with the usage of the words "I" and "we." If you want to negotiate with a difficult person it is imperative that you focus on the third person and them specifically. By saying the word "I' continuously you subconsciously send the message that it is all about you and difficult people are less tolerant of other people than most and usually only respond to the focus being exclusively on themselves and the consequence of not cooperating with "the group." Instead of "I need" it would be far better to say "there needs to be" or "the company needs." Difficult people don't care what you need. The other faux pas is the usage of "we." To a difficult person "we" sends the message that you and them are one in the same, which at this point the difficult person is completely against. Unless you have some kind of previously established comradery I would avoid using this word at all costs. The second part of getting a difficult person to cooperate is to make them feel that there might be an implied sense of loss or embarrassment if they don't cooperate. And difficult people usually only respond to hard persuasion which involves dramatic things such as loss or embarrassment. The other thing is to make sure that you tell them how much time they have to cooperate. I highly doubt that 95% of people out there would have the gall to actually verbalize the blunt messages offered in this book directly to the person in question as well. An ideal starter message in my opinion would be "Excuse me, John, can I talk to you about a certain office procedure, I'm not sure if you remember, if you're aware or not, but I'm talking specifically about that one thing you've been looking to try to achieve or avoid. Do you have time now to talk because I'm not sure if the company needs to understand your point of view even if they don't always have time for these things" Then you could follow that up with "John, if you remember, if you were aware or not in the past, when you said 'xyz' to so and so, there may have been a kind of feeling of "hurt," possibly a feeling you may be aware of when you may or may not have done something that didn't turn out how you liked it in the past, that feeling you get when you don't get treated the right way, the point being because to some we weren't sure if you did or didn't care about what was in the best interest of everyone." From there you could say "I have been told there needs to be a change in approach towards cooperating by "specific time frame" or the company could lose financially and there's a possibility that you, yourself, could lose (name consequence that implies a sense of embarrassment for them.) and the consequences for you could be long lasting. Inside you might have been thinking, do I really care? or maybe you were thinking, do I really want to deal with the downside of that? I don't know if there's a part of you that has ever dealt with that before, but according to the company, the decision you make in the next few minutes may or may not be the most important decision you will make today for your career. You may want to be thinking about that and what would go down in company history as far as your actions today." These are just my somewhat educated opinions, but are based on a bit of reading and research.
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