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4.1 out of 5 stars
4.1 out of 5 stars
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on 12 September 2012
Ted is hilarious, rude and crude (possibly the word you will see in every review of this movie). The film is cast with comedy gold, with a smattering of Family Guy voice actors thrown in for good measure, and the one-liners smack you in the face right from the beginning. The hilarious narration (provided by Patrick Stewart) supplies a healthy handful of these. The mention of the Apache helicopter was still making me laugh when the film had ended.
What can sometimes be the best thing about a comedy is when it is set in a world that is actually believable - obviously with a living and breathing teddy bear involved this comment might seem slightly strange. However, everything else is plausible, and the animated bear is really well integrated into this world as a second rate "celebrity". From here, the laughs continue to flow.
Some people have described this as an hour-and-a-half long episode of Family Guy, and although the humour is broadly the same, believe it or not, there is much more substance to this movie, with sex, romance, danger, drugs and language used in ways that a twenty-minute episode of Family Guy could only dream of.
As John (Mark Wahlberg) and Lori (Mila Kunis) try to create some kind of life together, Ted's shenanigans (possibly an understatement as these shenanigans often involve parties, drugs and prostitutes) continue to come between them. To John, he is just having fun with his longtime friend. To Lori, John is being influenced more and more by these "shenanigans".
I saw one review describe Ted as "wildy unoriginal", however I'm not sure if you can get more original with a storyline that involves a walking, talking, drug-addled teddy bear. So often, comedies are hit and miss, or run out of steam towards the end. Ted, however, is not one of these and this is why it is probably one of the best and most original comedies I have ever seen. Perhaps the plot is fairly standard, but with the creator of Family Guy at the helm, things don't always go the way you expect.
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on 26 December 2012
It's not a family guy episode. It just isn't - don't be put off by the people who claim it is.

What it is however, is 106 minutes of laughs with a smattering of suspense (no, really), and it's rounded off nicely with a heartwarming ending. All of that sounds a biit "meh", but when it's funny it's really funny - Ted going for a job interview at the supermarket had me almost hyperventilating with laughter. And there are some real near-to-the-knuckle comic moments.

Patrick Stewart expertly narrates the opening scenes with excellent comic precision.

If you're a big FG fan, you'll recognise that some of the crew are from FG:
Walter Murphy does the music as he does on Family Guy.
Alec Sulkin and Wellesley Wild had a hand in the screenplay.

Also from FG:
Lois (Alex Borstein) young John's mum
Joe Swanson (Partrick Warburton) John's work friend, easily recognisible by his voice
And in Ted, Lori is played by Mila Kunis who is Meg in Family Guy.

Other cameos from memory include Flash Gordon (Sam J. Jones), Ryan Reynolds, and Norah Jones and Tom Skerritt.
And a special mention must go to Giovanni Ribisi who is an excellent actor, he plays "weirdos" so well.

For me, this was the second best film of 2012 (Avengers if you're wondering), and is well worthy of a place in your DVD collection.

I've knocked a star off because it sagged for 10 minutes or so, don't let that put you off though.
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on 18 December 2012
This is not a film I would normally watch. I was railroaded into it by my wife on a flight over the weekend. She had started watching it and subsequently persuaded me to interrupt my viewing of another film to watch this. My expectations were low. I'll conclude at the beginning - its brilliant. Looking at the other reviews this is a bit of a Marmite movie. Plenty of one starers to accompany the fortunate majority of five starers. You need to be able to see beyond the superficiality of a talking, swearing bear to appreciate this film. Not everyone will be able to do this. Bad luck guys - you are missing out. I found the comedy fresh and witty. OK, so its rather rude, but thats kinda where its roots are. I've never seen a teddy bear smoking a bong surrounded by hookers. Thats fresh for sure! The wit comes from the way Ted is portrayed - as a down and out human like character trying to cling on to his role as a teddy bear - a little boy's friend who has now grown up. Wahlberg, on the other hand, is a grown man trying to relinquish his role as a teddy bear's custodian. He does it brilliantly too. There is plenty of comedy friction to be had from this unusual situation. I loved the way the story progressed. Deep within it all there are some touching messages to be found. Depending on which side of the Marmite fence you sit this might be easy or hard. But most definitely worth a try
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There is nothing like a foul mouthed teddy bear to make for a great movie. Personally I think Zach Galifianakis would have made a better Ted, but then again he has played the dysfunctional buddy role before. As a child John (Mark Wahlberg) wishes for and gets a talking teddy bear. Now that they are in their 30's neither one has grown out of their immaturity with Ted becoming an increasing problem.

John's girlfriend Lori (Mila Kunis) demands that either Ted leaves or she goes. The humor is what one would expect from watching "Family Guy" with a lot of adult language. It spoofs other films and is critical of many aspects of society. It is politically incorrect. Like "Family Guy" some of the bits work and some don't. If you don't find one bit funny wait a minute and a new one comes along.

Excessive f-bombs, sex, heavy drug use, no nudity.
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on 10 March 2015
One of the funniest films you'll see if you don't mind bad language and toilet humour....and sex references, and Family Guy....

Mark Wahlberg is on form and good at delivering some comedy in this film alongside Ted (Seth McFarlane) and the duo will have you laughing from start to finish. Mila Kunis also supports the 2 main characters and adds the eye candy for the men out there. For most of the film though you will be laughing at the jokes, references and visual humour. There's also a treat for fans of Flash Gordon...

If you like Family Guy you'll love this.
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It would be hard not to laugh at this: a grown man of 35 who's best friends with a talking teddy he got when he was eight, which now encourages him in a totally immature party and drugs lifestyle while his girlfriend despairs of him ever amounting to anything. On their fourth anniversary of being together he gives her a cheap pair of earrings - well, you can't win them all ... At least there was a present, and he took her to a snazzy restaurant, and is not averse to impromptu sex, even if it is a water pistol in his pocket. But there's more ... she shouldn't be complaining too much, really. Mila Kunis plays her with a good mix of modern savvy city girl and tender but frustrated partner - after all she has a lot to contend with. Ted is really the star of the show - loud, raucous and very vulgar, he steals most scenes. He gets a job in a supermarket and gets a very brassy girlfriend while speaking to his boss with outsize vulgarity. Mark Wahlberg is also brilliant as the human lead - again, a mix of vulnerable and wide boy, and an indefinable appealing quality in the face. Much of the humour is quite outrageous, usually in a sexual/lavatorial way, but this is what seals its brilliance. There is a fight scene between Wahlberg and the bear that is quite hilarious in classic Tom and Jerry style - very violent, but no harm done. It really works, Seth MacFarlane has a fierce talent and the Ted/Wahlberg combo make most New York superheroes pale into insignificance.
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on 22 November 2015
Great movie and the animation of ted looks so realistic it's amazing to watch the behind the scenes to se show they did it. I'm also a mila Kunis fan so this was great to watch just to see mila Kunis! So any mila fans would be happy with this movie of not for the movie itself.
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on 19 September 2014
Firstly, let it be announced, this IS NOT a KIDS movie lol.

Strong adult sexual theme throughout, but my opinion is this...

It is one of the FUNNIEST, Hilarious, naughty, and uplifting movie I've watched in a long time. At first, I've delayed watching this film thinking it was going to be one of those silly childlike comedies...

omg, miss it and you've missed a great treat.

I laughed my socks off... didn't even care if my neighbours two roads away could hear me.... it was BRILLIANT .... whilst couldn't believe my eyes at what I was watching in parts... so raunchy lol lol

A fabulous uplifting film for anyone looking to have a giggle, anyone in deep depression and need a helping hand out of it and just for anyone who needs to take a chillax moment and get away from humdrum life.

Story line great albeit why is it always the jealous female partner to cause destruction and mayhem, I wanted to throttle his girlfriend, but she saved the day so all is not lost.

It is NOT what you initial expect I guarantee that, it will outdo any expectations you may have

I hope they make TED 2, I would for sure watch it immediately

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on 3 January 2015
This is one of the best films I have seen as it is so funny and stars Mila Kunis

But Beware it comes with a '15' BBFC rating for 'Very Strong Language, Strong Sex References, Drug Use and Brief Soft Nudity'. I fully agree with this rating as this is NOT a Children/Young Teen film as it is very rude! No one younger than 15/16 should see this!
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on 6 July 2015
WARNING this film has aot of swearing,for those with adults film.a boy makes a wish for a lifetime friend and his new teddybear comes to life.a hilariouse film from start to finnish.cant wait to see ted 2,RECOMMEND
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