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Reviews Written by
The Movie Guy "Movies from A to Z" (United States)
(TOP 500 REVIEWER)   

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Independence Day: Resurgence [DVD]
Independence Day: Resurgence [DVD]
Dvd ~ Liam Hemsworth
Price: £12.99

3.0 out of 5 stars YOU HAVE THE HEART OF A WARRIOR, 31 July 2016
It is 19 years later. The aliens return bigger and better, but the Earth is rebuilt using alien technology.

Will Smith is not in this film, so they killed hm off as a test pilot and his son Dylan (Jessie T. Usher) has no sense of humor. Mom (Vivica A. Fox) is back for what amounts to a cameo and is no longer a pole dancer. They did resurrect Dr. Brakish Okun (Brent Spiner) who apparently wasn't killed by the alien behind the glass. Bill Pullman returns as the retired President who initially comes off as senile. His daughter (Maika Monroe) is also a pilot.

The hot shot maverick pilot is Liam Hemsworth pretending to be Tom Cruise, but coming off more like Val Kilmer.

The story feels superficial. It was not iconic like the first one which built great characters we all loved and slowly went into the action. In this episode, the idea to harvest the earth's life and elements has changed to taking its core, something they could be doing to uninhabited planets. Pac-man is on our side and this leads to a sequel...if they decide to make it. Maybe they can find a way to knock off Liam Hemsworth and resurrect Will Smith. Liam Hemsworth was a bad casting choice, not Jesse Eisenberg- Lex Luthor bad, but a bad one nonetheless.

Guide: Hot Asian chick- no personality either. Bad casting choices, bland dialogue.


Chosen [DVD]
Chosen [DVD]
Dvd ~ Harvey Keital
Price: £8.99

5.0 out of 5 stars MAKE SURE EVERY BULLET COUNTS, 30 July 2016
This review is from: Chosen [DVD] (DVD)
PLOT SPOILER (?) REVIEW

The film is based on a true story. Pappy (Harvey Keital) tells his grandson Max (Julian Shatkin) the story of a true hero for his school 1,000 word essay. He did not tell him it was his autobiography and the kid didn't take notes.

This is a flashback story of Sonson (Luke Mably), an Hungarian Jewish lawyer who in 1943 had the job of making big stones into small ones. After the German occupation, his wife (Diana Cavallioti) dies because Jews were not allowed medicine, making his life of neutrality difficult. His sister-in-law Judith (Ana Ularu) is placed on a train and sent to Poland. Vowing to rescue her (she was actually doing fine on her own) Sonson walks to Poland, dresses up as an SS general and leads an underground rebellion.

Sonson was a dry reluctant hero who was void of character and voice for much of the film, showing how true heroes are humble and "just a man." Harvey Keital, the headliner has a small role as the story teller. Luke Mably was on the screen for most of the film.

Guide: No swearing or nudity. Clothed rape scene. 4 1/2 stars


Legion Of The Dead [DVD]
Legion Of The Dead [DVD]
Dvd ~ Courtney Clonch

3.0 out of 5 stars SHE WILL BRING DEATH AND PAIN, 30 July 2016
This review is from: Legion Of The Dead [DVD] (DVD)
A cursed Egyptian tomb is discovered in California which I didn't grasp either. Like Jason, the mummy is reanimated during a thunderstorm. The naked mummy (Claudia Lynx) kills people and is in cahoots with the guy in the Indiana Jones hat to take over the world. Only Molly (Courtney Clonch) a grad student and her near boyfriend can save the world.

This is an Asylum film that came out about the same time as "Land of the Dead" and was banking on the confusion of title. The plot is mixed up like most Asylum films and acting is secondary. The biggest draw of the production is Iranian born model Claudia Lynx,considered one of the most beautiful women in the world, gets naked. Feel free to fast forward and pause, it's not VHS.

Guide: F-word. Nudity.


Consumption [DVD]
Consumption [DVD]
Dvd ~ Arielle Brachfeld
Price: £12.99

1.0 out of 5 stars THERE ARE NO SECRETS ON THIS MOUNTAIN, 30 July 2016
This review is from: Consumption [DVD] (DVD)
Two couples stay at the Aspen condo where Seth (David Lautman) spent part of his childhood and manages to tell everyone a ghost story about a bride that didn't make much sense. Seth's mother (Maria Olsen) is recently deceased and Seth has a suitcase in the trunk he doesn't want anyone to touch. One character is an alcoholic, another an atheist, and another is pregnant. They are warned to leave and then suddenly the make-up person goes from one character to the next putting dark circles under the eyes so they can spout silly stuff and do things with an implement of destruction. The people in the sheets was another low budget flop idea and what was with the 60's turning color wheel? The story of ghostly possession was a boring confusing mess with terrible acting and lines. College project?

Guide: F-word. Attempted sex and nudity.


Bat Outta Hell [DVD]
Bat Outta Hell [DVD]
Dvd ~ Vernon Wells

3.0 out of 5 stars STOP CREEPING, 29 July 2016
This review is from: Bat Outta Hell [DVD] (DVD)
Some young kids are hired to film in South Australia. They spend the night at Nowhere Else (population 2....now 1 since Ida died). There is some internal conflict and some other things going on behind the scenes. What they end up filming is the "Cryptid Bat" a huge bat with a human face described as being a reptile...which is odd since it is nocturnal and is supposedly all over the world...but they opt to film in the middle of Nowhere instead of Lodi, California, home of a sighting.

The movie is supposed to be found footage, but it is not. It is professionally shot- thank you. There is no ground cam, no running cam, only "what was that" cam. The acting goes on the negative side of the ledger with Rachael Murphy creating the most red ink with her teary flashback story. They could have cut that whole scene out and placed it in the "deleted scenes" section of the DVD.

The creature was fairy decent when they showed him.

Guide: No sex or nudity.


Finding Dory
Finding Dory
Dvd
Price: £13.99

5.0 out of 5 stars WHAT WOULD DORY DO?, 29 July 2016
This review is from: Finding Dory (Amazon Video)
Dory is a Bluefish who has short term memory problems. Dory gets lost, makes friends and tries to find her way home, where ever that is. She is out in the Pacific Ocean and travels to California by swimming into the sunset...I'm not exactly sure how that works.

The story is cute, humorous, and basically unoffensive. Ellen DeGeneres places her quirky self into the role as if it was created with her in mind. Fun for the whole family.


Jackrabbit
Jackrabbit
Dvd
Price: £9.99

3.0 out of 5 stars UNKNOWN HOST IS ACCESSING YOUR COMPUTER, 29 July 2016
This review is from: Jackrabbit (Amazon Video)
The film takes place in Austin, Texas now known as "City 6" twenty-five years after "the reset." The reset was never fully explained and provided one of those mystery aspects that was unnecessary. The world lost most of its modern electronics (we see VHS and record players) and there is a constant cloud cover over City 6. Announcements about the dangers of airborne radioactive contamination that is present is made daily. People take iodine pills.

The story centers on Simon (Josh Caras) an electronic geek who recently got a job with VODO, a corporation that are the benign rulers of the city. Currency is all electronic bits. Food and gas is available in supply, enough to prevent a Mad Max world. After the suicide of Eric, Simon meets Max (Ian Christopher Noel) an anarchist type electronic wizard who wants out of the city. He gets a coded message that sends him and Simon out to look for the mysterious answers following obscure clues.

THEME PLOT SPOILER: The film asks the question of security vs. freedom. VODO provides for the people and keeps them alive. "Technology maintains stability." They don't want more people to come in and overload their capacity to produce. Nor do they want people to leave and risk telling people about the City. There is something else out there, but what? Other cities? Desert? Radiation?

Note: Iodine pills would no longer be needed after 25 years. The question would be was there something else in the pill, or was this something the script writers flubbed on their research?

Guide: F-word. No sex or nudity. The back of Joslyn Jensen neck was the only eye candy. Soft 3 stars


Killer Ink [DVD]
Killer Ink [DVD]
Dvd ~  Sara Fabel, Tiffany DeMarco Robert LaSardo
Price: £7.99

4.0 out of 5 stars A FAMILY TRADITION, 29 July 2016
This review is from: Killer Ink [DVD] (DVD)
Six American students are vacationing in Vilnius, Lithuania because...they are. Brock (Ben Whalen) meets up with Uta (Sara Fabel) an aggressive hottie with plenty of tattoos. Uta invites Brock back to a tattoo parlor for sex, while Amy (Tiffany DeMarco) tags along to get a tattoo from a famous artist...who also looks like a vampire.

The film quickly builds in a unique parlor of pain, suffering, and family tradition.

This is close to an 80's style of film down to the sound track. Sara Fabel and Robert LaSardo did well in the villain role. Film also contains an often used twist, but hey, it needed something else.

Good film for those that like carnage, tattoos and topless women.

Guide: F-bomb, sex, ample nudity. Blood and torture.


Tattoo Connection- Jim Kelly (Slim Case)
Tattoo Connection- Jim Kelly (Slim Case)
Offered by M and N Media US
Price: £69.87

3.0 out of 5 stars I'VE ALWAYS DONE THINGS ON MY OWN, 29 July 2016
This film is also known as "Black Belt Jones 2." When the "North Pole Star" (not Polaris) diamond is stolen by Mr Lu's Tattoo gang. Mr Lucas (Jim Kelly) "The Black 6 Million Dollar Man" is called in to get the stone back. He has to combat many people hand to hand without his shirt against high kicking rubber soled sneakers and go to topless night clubs in Hong King.

The film was horribly dubbed. 3 stars for naked hot Asian chicks before they were en vogue.

Guide: Not much in language. FF nudity.


Haunted Shore
Haunted Shore
Dvd
Price: £7.99

3.0 out of 5 stars YOU LIVE AROUND HERE OFTEN?, 29 July 2016
This review is from: Haunted Shore (Amazon Video)
Eddie Hooper (Walt Plummer) leaves the Coast Guard in Florida to take a salmon guide boat job in Astoria, Oregon...and look for his missing brother. His investigation centers around a goth chick, Victoria Chandler (Briana Ledford) who was the last to have seen him and a string of missing people.

The film is being repackaged under the title "Crimps" a slang term for con artist with new ghostly DVD art work. The production is low budget and has a made-for-TV feel. It is a supernatural mystery. The clues start to come together at about 50 minutes into the film, which does give closure. While this is not a bad film, the performance of Walt Plummer was lack luster.

Guide: F-word. Nudity (Marcella Laasch) 2 1/2 STARS


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