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Helpful Votes: 108

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Fleece_Fire (Norwich, UK)

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Offered by jim-exselecky
Price: £3.93

24 of 48 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Overlong, pretentious and she's definitely NOT the saviour of music., 11 Nov. 2013
This review is from: ARTPOP [CD+DVD] (Audio CD)
Good old Lady Gaga, trying so desperate to remain relevant in this day and age. But unfortunately, after 4 years of parading around in tedious ' OMG so controversial!!!!!' costumes, people are tired of her gimmicks and are paying close attention to her music.

Is it any good? Not really. Is it terrible? Just painfully average. There's too many songs here and even the more accomplished tracks only have MOMENTS of greatness as opposed to being consistently great. Is she saving pop music? Well, she's better than a lot of the rubbish acts we have around but she's nowhere near good enough to save it.


No, it's the usual pop music that can be found anywhere on the charts at any time. She's not doing anything pioneering or pushing any boundaries. The music is simplistic and the lyrics are trite and, very frequently, embarrassing. Listen to the lyrics of Aura and try not to cringe. I DARE you.

She's your bog standard pop star and no pretentious blabbering on about Andy Warhol and his soup cans and wearing a meat dress is going to change any of that. It would be ok if it all MEANT something but it's just a constant stream of 'hey guys, i'm dressing crazy again! Dressing up like it's Halloween when it isn't actually Halloween is really clever and i'm a genius!'. BORING!

There are some decent tunes on here such as Venus, Do What U Want and Manicure is pretty addictive too. The Fame (Monster) remains her best work. Just pure pop with no unnecessary bells and whistles. And above all CATCHY.

I would give this album a 2 star rating but i feel that there is way too much unjustified love being thrown at this absurdly overrated woman and i feel the need to counter that. And if you can't handle that then i assume you need to sort your life out because getting angry over a review is pretty sad.
Comment Comments (9) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Jan 12, 2014 7:56 PM GMT

Ride to Hell: Retribution(PS3)
Ride to Hell: Retribution(PS3)
Offered by Real Satisfaction
Price: £4.68

1 of 8 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Everything you could possibly want from an action game., 8 Nov. 2013
Thrilling action (the driving sections are mindblowing), the controls are fluid and accessible, the locations beautifully rendered and varied and the voice acting is sublime. The voice actors really BECOME the characters.

There isn't anything to dislike about this game and it's sad to see that it has become very underrated. It's an unpretentious game that doesn't try to be something it isn't unlike hot messes like Metal Gear Solid 4 and the wretched 'shoot now then shoot some more later' Uncharted series.

Extremely recommended!


The Marshall Mathers LP 2
The Marshall Mathers LP 2
Offered by mrtopseller
Price: £3.74

11 of 110 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars More homophobia and bragging. HOW ORIGINAL., 5 Nov. 2013
When he's not shouting about how his contemporaries are oxygen thieves and how much he hates homosexuals, we get the usual 'i've got a big car and have sold a lot of records' rubbish. You know, the same lyrical content of EVERY HIP HOP ALBUM EVER. Yeah, it's very circular songwriting. He just talks about himself and how good he is at what he does......which is singing about himself 0_o He sounds very insecure, need a hug Mr Eminem???.

And there is way too much swearing. He can surely get his point across without the coarse language. But then again he needs to appeal to the teenage idiots who think that 'SWeaRinGG Iz Like, SooooO KOOL!!!!!'. He needs to grow up, he's 41 years old! FORTY ONE!

Buy it if you plan on scaring away Somalian pirates or torturing terrorists. Or maybe punishing yourself for something you did in a past life.
Comment Comments (28) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Jul 18, 2014 6:49 PM BST

Call of Duty: Ghosts (PS3)
Call of Duty: Ghosts (PS3)
Offered by Go2Games
Price: £3.13

10 of 55 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars I yawned so loud i thought my head was going to come off., 5 Nov. 2013
GRAPHICS: Alright i guess. Not exactly Epic Mickey 2 or Duke Nukem Forever but they're passable.
STORY: Shoot loads of bad people (mostly non-white and non-American) in generic, uninteresting locations (not in America though because Big Bad Men don't live in America). The story could be fitted onto the back of a first class stamp and you'd still have room.
GAMEPLAY: Pew pew pew!!!!!!!!. Kill dem naughty foreigners! Press triangle to brutally kill another human being!. Press circle to destruct scenery that contains innocent civilians! Repeat until the game mercifully finishes and you're completely desensitized to the fragility of human nature. By that time though you'll probably be wishing for a lorry to crash through the wall and run you over. There is no diplomacy or humanity in this game. EVERYTHING is solved by violence. No wonder people can't keep their doors open at night anymore. Games like these are influencing the younger generations to be mindless thugs hellbent on bloodshed and intimidation through physical means.
SOUND: Meh. And the dialogue sucks eggs. It's nice that they couldn't afford decent voice actors.
REPLAY VALUE: ROFL! Not a chance.
MULTIPLAYER: Horrible. But that's probably because i couldn't find anyone online who would play it because they were too embarrassed to play it so i was all alone. Not that i'm complaining as it allowed me to finish this very helpful review earlier.

Don't buy it unless you've got a thing for terrible games. And there was nary a supernatural element in sight thus rendering the 'ghosts' of the title incredibly misleading. I can see without hesitation that this is THE worst game of the year without parallel. AVOID.
Comment Comments (18) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Nov 7, 2013 3:10 PM GMT

James Arthur (Deluxe)
James Arthur (Deluxe)
Offered by DVD Overstocks
Price: £6.22

16 of 37 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Not even worth 20p., 4 Nov. 2013
This review is from: James Arthur (Deluxe) (Audio CD)
Mumbling vocals from a man who sounds like he's grieving the death of his dog whilst suffering from constipation. And the songs are listless, forgettable rubbish. The silence inbetween tracks was quite good though.

Get the Tinie Tempah album instead of this bland X Factor rubbish. See you at Butlins 2017, James.
Comment Comments (11) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Nov 15, 2013 10:06 PM GMT

The Hangover Trilogy - Limited Edition Steelbook [Blu-ray] [2013] [Region Free]
The Hangover Trilogy - Limited Edition Steelbook [Blu-ray] [2013] [Region Free]
Dvd ~ Bradley Cooper
Price: £28.12

10 of 98 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Who needs funny jokes when you can have ceeerrr-aaaaaazy things happening all the time?, 3 Nov. 2013
*'Crazy' thing happens*
Character 1 (The nerdy one): "Oh my god, did you see that?"
Character 2 (The douchey one): "Woah, that was awesome!. The thing that just happened was crazy!"
Character 3 (The stupid one): "Hey guys, i'm saying something crazy and i'm saying it in a nasally voice which is meant to be quirky."
Audience: "Where's the jokes?"
Audience (aged younger than 11): "Shut up idiot, not every film is meant to be an Oscar winner yo!"

*'Crazy' thing happens*
Character 1 (The nerdy one): "A tiger in a bathroom! It's so crazy and me shouting about is meant to be funny!"
Character 2 (The douchey one): "Woah, that was awesome. A tiger in a bathroom is WTF and crazy, man!"
Character 3 (The stupid one): "Hey guys, i'm saying something crazy and i'm saying it in a nasally voice. I also have a beard. Isn't that just crazy?"
Audience: "Yeah, it's crazy in a kind of contrived way but it isn't funny"
Audience (aged younger than 11): "The stupid one just made it so the baby looked like it was masturbating! BEST FILM EVA!!!!"

*'Crazy' thing happens*
Character 1 (The nerdy one): "The script doesn't call for me to say anything remotely funny or well written so i'm going to once again SCREAM about how everything is crazy even though the audience knows about all the craziness that is happening onscreen"
Character 2 (The douchey one): "No way man, did you see that crazy thing? That was really crazy!!!!!!."
Character 3 (The stupid one): "I'm beardy and fat and quirky. The humour stems from my quirkiness. I say nothing funny the entire film."
Audience (aged younger than 11): "This film is an epic win because i am the lowest common denominator"
Audience: "ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz......*wakes up* did i miss anything?"
Character 4 (Squeaky Asian): "OMG not only do i also scream about crazy things happening but i also do it in camp accent for cheap laughs. Isn't that just awesome???"
Audience: "Wow, remember when America made films like Airplane and The Naked Gun?"
Comment Comments (8) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Oct 28, 2015 5:41 PM GMT

Disney Epic Mickey 2 - The Power of Two (PS3)
Disney Epic Mickey 2 - The Power of Two (PS3)
Offered by Hauseinkauf
Price: £15.90

0 of 5 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars One of THE greatest adventure games ever made., 2 Nov. 2013
Cannot fault this brilliantly executed game. Astonishing graphics, the gameplay mechanics are wonderful and the further you progress, the more addicted you get. It puts trash like the abominable Uncharted and Rachet and Clank franchises to shame.

Thank the heavens that we have a developer that isn't afraid to create a game that veers on the more innocent side of human nature. Too many bloodsoaked shoot 'em ups in this day and age made by those of questionable mental processing. They probably enjoy killing animals and beating their wives too.

Get this game if you don't already. You will not forget it.
Comment Comment (1) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Nov 2, 2013 6:02 PM GMT

Battlefield 4 (PS3)- Limited Edition
Battlefield 4 (PS3)- Limited Edition
Offered by filmrollen
Price: £11.06

6 of 38 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Boom! Crash! Ratatatat! Smash! Bang!, 1 Nov. 2013
Well, the developers gave the game an appropriate name at least. There's definitely a battle and i'm sure i saw a field at one point. So they have a certain level of competency. Unfortunately, outside of the clever title (originally called Gun Kill Bad Foreigners 4: Gimme Yo Dollars Foo'), the game is about as boring as playing Chess with an old man who's deaf, blind and mute. Insane amounts of poor, embarrassing macho dialogue that sounds like it was written by a person who has never encountered an actual human being in his life. Well, maybe one of them fat headed gym morons that poses in big mirrors with tiny, feminine pouches whilst gurning like Jim Carrey after a stroke. The graphics looks alright but so does that cute girl at the nightclub until you realize that engaging in a conversation with her is about as fun as slowly lowering your forehead onto an upturned machete. At one point i ran into a wall and got TRAPPED. That's right, even the goddamn wall wants to kill me! And the gameplay is the usual 'OMG! WE NEEDZ 2 SHOOT EVERY1 IN SIGHT ESPECIALLY IF DEY R NOT WHITE AND HAVE ZERO GUILT ABOUT DOING MASS KILLINZ 4 MAH COUNTREE!!!!!!!'. Absolutely no realism at all, in real life you'd get killed with one shot and you'd have more compassion about ending the lives of others. War is nothing like this in real life.

I tried giving it to a charity shop but they said that selling the item on would ruin the company's reputation. Can't say i blame them. So i ended up burying it in my garden amongst all the other 1,093 depraved worthless FPSs that i used to own like Doom, Call Of Duty: Black Ops and Goldeneye 64.

I advise everyone to vote with their wallets and stop buying these mindless games and buy something that has storytelling merit like Epic Mickey or Deadpool.
Comment Comments (6) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Nov 24, 2013 9:06 PM GMT

Supernatural - Season 8 Complete [DVD]
Supernatural - Season 8 Complete [DVD]
Dvd ~ Jared Padalecki
Price: £11.99

4 of 62 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars More American dross., 29 Oct. 2013
Bland pretty boys that can't act do lots of unconvincing stuff whilst managing to outwood a whole forest in terms of acting ability. Steer clear of this nonsense. Remember when acting, dialogue and direction played a big part in the making of a TV show?. Well, the makers of this show obviously didn't get the message instead opting to focus on casting a pair of underwear models because 'teh kidz will think their reely hawt!'.

Cack that could ONLY have been made by Americans (the land of the lowbrow).
Comment Comments (16) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Oct 29, 2014 11:58 PM GMT

Now You See Me [DVD]
Now You See Me [DVD]
Dvd ~ Jesse Eisenberg
Price: £4.00

5 of 20 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Why can't i give it less than 1 star?, 29 Oct. 2013
This review is from: Now You See Me [DVD] (DVD)
1. Horrible title.
2. Jesse Eisenberg doing his usual fast talking, obnoxious nerd thing that he's done in...every single film he's ever made. Ever. Felt like punching him in his smug face the entire film. Does the director expect us to care for this character?
3. Most of the magic stuff is CGI. Cheating surely?
4. Morgan Freeman and Michael Caine are in a film that isn't made by Christopher Nolan.
5. Isla Fisher. Too hot and it distracts from the story. Sorry, i meant 'story'.
6. Dave Franco is a douche.
7. My wallet is lighter. Now you see me now you don't indeed.
Comment Comments (5) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Apr 5, 2014 9:14 AM BST

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