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Helpful Votes: 129

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Freedom Of Speech (London,United Kingdom)

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F1 Race Stars (Xbox 360)
F1 Race Stars (Xbox 360)

0 of 6 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Poor Mans Mario Kart, 11 Feb. 2014
I can't believe some people,someone somewhere asid : Great Game, my 11 year old thinks it's brill. It is in line with Mario Cart so if you like "real" driving games it's not for you but if you like a fun driving race go for it 10 out of 10 on Christmas afternoon.

sounds to me like someone is blaming an imaginary 11 year old son,when they're actually talking about themselves.trust me this game is crap,it looks vaguely like Mario Kart but plays like a bucket of spanners,and I'm not talking about the gaming community when I say spanners.this game is truly awful,really basic,really unrealistic and really poorly made.not fun at all.avoid like the proverbial plague,at all costs.
Comment Comment (1) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Mar 10, 2014 2:55 PM GMT


Fuse
Fuse
Offered by filmrollen
Price: £7.34

1 of 7 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Who's blown a fuse ?........not me., 11 Feb. 2014
This review is from: Fuse (Video Game)
I'm back again , everyone's favourite "hit the report button" reviewer : GamesMasterForLife . I'm prepared to reap the consequences of my actions , but are you ready ? For anyone that's struggling to keep up I'm going to simplify it all for you , this is a troll review written by the same very talented individual that's never played this game and has no future plans to do so either . From what I've heard this game is very basic in every way , shape & form. From simple graphics to dull as dishwater gameplay that'll keep you hooked for seconds . Feel like hitting the report button yet ? Well read on then , you soon will . You control a few people in the game with different weapons , power ups are available to you when you collect stuff and as you can probably tell the game has nothing new to offer anyone .
I hope if you're thinking of buying this game and you're reading this review hoping it'll help you make a decision I'll have to stop you there and tell you now that this is a troll review . I spend as much time playing video games as you "Things" spend time outside interacting with other human beings . This review might not be helpful but it's still the best review for this game on the whole of Amazon and that's a guarantee .

Calm Down Son
Freedom Of Speech
Knows
Best


Killers Creed [DVD]
Killers Creed [DVD]
Dvd ~ Bai Ling
Offered by FREETIME
Price: £3.34

1 of 7 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars OMG what a pile of rubbish, 6 Feb. 2014
This review is from: Killers Creed [DVD] (DVD)
Lets start the ball roling by giving you a brief overview of whats happening in the movie.It's set sometime in a version of the future which I can't deny whether its a true version or a false one as I have no idea what the future holds for anyone.It sees someone hacking into your DNA which then lets them kill you assassin style.call me old fashioned but I prefer the gun,knife or hands around the throat way of killing.but this movie prefers the cowards way of dealing with murder.lots of movies have had stealth assassins killing people and lots of those movies have been executed very well (See what I did there,I'm so clever aren't I ?) the movie has an 18 certificate for some reason but Amazon say it's only suitable for people 15 years and over .I suppose they're right because if you're 18 you're definitely over 15 aren't you .the cast I've never heard of a single one of them,the director .....well I've never heard of them either.but what I can say about the cast and director is this,they need to be got rid of for polluting the world with filth like this.after watching this movie I had to throw my DVD player away after it got contaminated with the movie .and because of my respect for my DVD player I owed it to throw it away.

This review isn't just a rancid rant,it's words of wisdom and you should take note.anyone that's ever read any of my previous reviewing masterpieces will know how powerful I am in the reviewing world,and I'm not to be messed with.

Keep
Calm
Freedom Of Speech
Knows
Best
Comment Comments (3) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Feb 11, 2014 10:33 PM GMT


Tomb Raider Definitive Edition (Xbox One)
Tomb Raider Definitive Edition (Xbox One)
Offered by Digitalville UK
Price: £13.86

0 of 25 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Phlegm Raider, 4 Feb. 2014
These fools couldn't make a decent game if someone competent made it for them.when you consider all the hype that's surrounded this game you'll be totally gutted when you actually play it.and you'll think to yourself " Don't believe the hype"

The graphics, in particular, are awful, dragging the ageing console 10 steps backwards. The game features a wide variety of environments, including dense forest areas, dimly-lit caves and crumbling shanty towns.the gameplay is very similar to "Assassins Creed" in that it's not very smooth,infact it needs a steamroller to smooth out the rough edges,desperately.playing this game really does feel like a chore from start to finish.and once you reach the finish line you can't help but ask yourself "Was that actually worth it ?" your answer will be 100% NO.The levels are designed to make Tomb Raider a thrilling experience but they actually make it look like a cut scene from Pokemon.unfortunately they haven't quite conquered the blending of cinematics and gameplay if I had made a game like this and spent millions of dollars on it I'd definitely expect it to be better than this.questions need to be answered and heads should roll.you will also need weapons upgrades to access certain parts of the game or else you wont be able to complete it.
Outside of the hugely unsuccessful single-player campaign, Tomb Raider contains a fairly substantial multiplayer hub. Beyond the usual deathmatch modes, the game features the intriguing 'Rescue' mode, which pits scavengers against Lara's crew in a race to find medical supplies so dust off your headsets and fingers at the ready(Whatever floats your boat) there are some famous voice overs from the likes of Bruce Willis,Brad Pitt and Angelian Jolie to name but a few , but the lead role has Danny Devito as the voice,how awesome is that ?

If I had to choose a closing line to my cinematic review it would have to be : this game gets my 1 star seal of disapproval.

Thankyou.

Calm Down Son
Freedom Of Speech
Knows
Best


Tomb Raider Definitive Edition (PS4)
Tomb Raider Definitive Edition (PS4)
Offered by SelectGames
Price: £16.41

2 of 39 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Garbage Raider, 4 Feb. 2014
These fools couldn't make a decent game if someone competent made it for them.when you consider all the hype that's surrounded this game you'll be totally gutted when you actually play it.and you'll think to yourself " Don't believe the hype"

The graphics, in particular, are awful, dragging the ageing console 10 steps backwards. The game features a wide variety of environments, including dense forest areas, dimly-lit caves and crumbling shanty towns.the gameplay is very similar to "Assassins Creed" in that it's not very smooth,infact it needs a steamroller to smooth out the rough edges,desperately.playing this game really does feel like a chore from start to finish.and once you reach the finish line you can't help but ask yourself "Was that actually worth it ?" your answer will be 100% NO.The levels are designed to make Tomb Raider a thrilling experience but they actually make it look like a cut scene from Pokemon.unfortunately they haven't quite conquered the blending of cinematics and gameplay if I had made a game like this and spent millions of dollars on it I'd definitely expect it to be better than this.questions need to be answered and heads should roll.you will also need weapons upgrades to access certain parts of the game or else you wont be able to complete it.
Outside of the hugely unsuccessful single-player campaign, Tomb Raider contains a fairly substantial multiplayer hub. Beyond the usual deathmatch modes, the game features the intriguing 'Rescue' mode, which pits scavengers against Lara's crew in a race to find medical supplies so dust off your headsets and fingers at the ready(Whatever floats your boat) there are some famous voice overs from the likes of Bruce Willis,Brad Pitt and Angelian Jolie to name but a few , but the lead role has Danny Devito as the voice,how awesome is that ?

If I had to choose a closing line to my cinematic review it would have to be : this game gets my 1 star seal of disapproval.

Thankyou.
Comment Comments (7) | Permalink | Most recent comment: May 28, 2014 2:13 PM BST


Payday 2 (PC CD)
Payday 2 (PC CD)

0 of 17 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Pay With Your Sanity Day, 4 Feb. 2014
This review is from: Payday 2 (PC CD) (Video Game)
Not very impressed by this poor attempt at creating a video game by these new comers to the gaming industry. In all the reviews prior to release the game seemed to promise so much but in reality the game falls very short of all its promises , promises which were just a lot of hot air. How could robbing banks & shooting stuff go so horribly wrong ? I think the producers of this game could have made it oh so much better if they went out and did some real life research like robbing a few banks or maybe they could've interviewed a few bankers . The game is quite jerky to play and its far to easy as well . Maybe next time they'll do a better job after all they could hardly do much worse could they ?

Calm Down Son
Freedom Of Speech
Knows
Best
Comment Comment (1) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Oct 13, 2014 1:46 PM BST


Grand Theft Auto V (Xbox 360)
Grand Theft Auto V (Xbox 360)

1 of 14 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Grab Theft from the fanboys, 4 Feb. 2014
If you've played any of the previous versions of this so called game then you needn't bother wasting your time or money with the new instalment which is exactly the same as all the others. If it wasn't for the "Fanboys" Rockstar would be filing for bankruptcy , but because they change the front cover on the "New" VideoGame without actually changing the game people think its something different & because everyone else says "Ooh it's beautiful , it's the best thing since unemployment benefits" everyone else just says the same thing so they won't offend anyone.honestly though,this is exactly the same as all the rest .you steal cars,you fight people,you shoot people & if that wasn't enough you do the same thing all over again (Oh Joy) if you've still got your sanity and you want to hold onto it don't buy this. If you are insane , well do whatever you will.
Graphically this game sucks and gameplay matches the graphics .im shocked at hearing that the game cost £170 million to produce and have a question which is , what the hell did they spend all that money on because it certainly wasn't the game and I'm pretty sure if I spent £170 million on a new game packaging it would look a bit better than this one does, at least I'd hope it would. Which makes this the most expensive video games packaging ever made and my opinion is , it's not worth it. I'd personally say that Pay Day 2 is a million times better than this game and much more fun to play. Smoother graphics and far better gameplay. Not even a hundred downloadable upgrades door this game could save it , it absolutely stinks.
This is for everyone out there that thinks a game can be saved/improved just by having a bigger map and more wildlife, you know who you are. It any be saved though, you can't make a silk purse out of a sows ear no matter how brilliant you are.
Comment Comments (6) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Dec 27, 2014 7:11 PM GMT


Army of Two The Devil's Cartel overkill
Army of Two The Devil's Cartel overkill
Offered by scaddingk
Price: £15.00

0 of 3 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Army Of Poo, 4 Feb. 2014
let me start by getting all the usual stuff out of the way.Grammar this,Grammar that.there you go now that's all said and done we can continue with the job in hand.the review.

Lets start by saying the following :

Definition of ARMY

a: a large organized body of armed personnel trained for war especially on land

b: a unit capable of independent action and consisting usually of a headquarters, two or more corps, and auxiliary troops

coften capitalized: the complete military organization of a nation for land warfare

2: a great multitude <an army of birds>

: a body of persons organized to advance a cause

See army defined for English-language learners »

Examples of ARMY

the armies of Alexander the Great
He left home and joined the army after he graduated from high school.
The company employs an army of lawyers to handle its legal affairs.
They sent in a whole army of trained technicians.
The organization was founded by a dedicated army of volunteers.

seeing all the above information shows me that there can't be such a thing as an " Army Of Two " there just can't/and there shouldn't ,it's an awful game .EA are trying to ride on the successful coat tails of the very dissapointing Call Of Duty franchise which is also crap.It's really only the sort of game that would appeal to someone that's warming themselves up before going out on a shooting spree in America,which is why I have to give it a big thumbs down.sorry to all the Army Of Two Fanboys out there sitting and crying in their basements/dungeons with all their Lord Of The Rings dolls/posters & World Of Warcraft memorabilia.......If I were you I'd stick to chess club.LOL.the game has really suffered aver the years since it's original release,the gameplay hasn't imoroved,if anything it's taken a serious decline & I'd be very surprised if anyone actually liked this game.if there are any 5 star reviews for this they will be sarcastic troll reviews.and that comes with a GamesMasterForLife seal of approval,something you know you can trust.the weapons are ,well there should be more weapons available for you to use,maybe throw in a couple of power ups or something just to make them a bit better., after all you can never have too much power,can you.the gameplay is a bit jittery.

Must try harder.

But don't worry because as my profile picture says :
Keep calm GamesMasterForLife knows best.

Ciao for now "Fanboys"

LOL :-)

Calm Down Son
Freedom Of Speech
Knows
Best


Army of Two (Xbox 360)
Army of Two (Xbox 360)
Offered by PARTYGAMES UK
Price: £10.50

0 of 1 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Army Of Poo, 4 Feb. 2014
let me start by getting all the usual stuff out of the way.Grammar this,Grammar that.there you go now that's all said and done we can continue with the job in hand.the review.

Lets start by saying the following :

Definition of ARMY

a: a large organized body of armed personnel trained for war especially on land

b: a unit capable of independent action and consisting usually of a headquarters, two or more corps, and auxiliary troops

coften capitalized: the complete military organization of a nation for land warfare

2: a great multitude <an army of birds>

: a body of persons organized to advance a cause

See army defined for English-language learners »

Examples of ARMY

the armies of Alexander the Great
He left home and joined the army after he graduated from high school.
The company employs an army of lawyers to handle its legal affairs.
They sent in a whole army of trained technicians.
The organization was founded by a dedicated army of volunteers.

seeing all the above information shows me that there can't be such a thing as an " Army Of Two " there just can't/and there shouldn't ,it's an awful game .EA are trying to ride on the successful coat tails of the very dissapointing Call Of Duty franchise which is also crap.It's really only the sort of game that would appeal to someone that's warming themselves up before going out on a shooting spree in America,which is why I have to give it a big thumbs down.sorry to all the Army Of Two Fanboys out there sitting and crying in their basements/dungeons with all their Lord Of The Rings dolls/posters & World Of Warcraft memorabilia.......If I were you I'd stick to chess club.LOL.the game has really suffered aver the years since it's original release,the gameplay hasn't imoroved,if anything it's taken a serious decline & I'd be very surprised if anyone actually liked this game.if there are any 5 star reviews for this they will be sarcastic troll reviews.and that comes with a GamesMasterForLife seal of approval,something you know you can trust.the weapons are ,well there should be more weapons available for you to use,maybe throw in a couple of power ups or something just to make them a bit better., after all you can never have too much power,can you.the gameplay is a bit jittery.

Must try harder.

But don't worry because as my profile picture says :
Keep calm GamesMasterForLife knows best.

Ciao for now "Fanboys"

LOL :-)

Calm Down Son
Freedom Of Speech
Knows
Best


Army of Two: The 40th Day (PS3)
Army of Two: The 40th Day (PS3)
Offered by Excess Gaming
Price: £14.95

0 of 4 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Army Of Poo, 4 Feb. 2014
let me start by getting all the usual stuff out of the way.Grammar this,Grammar that.there you go now that's all said and done we can continue with the job in hand.the review.

Lets start by saying the following :

Definition of ARMY

a: a large organized body of armed personnel trained for war especially on land

b: a unit capable of independent action and consisting usually of a headquarters, two or more corps, and auxiliary troops

coften capitalized: the complete military organization of a nation for land warfare

2: a great multitude <an army of birds>

: a body of persons organized to advance a cause

See army defined for English-language learners »

Examples of ARMY

the armies of Alexander the Great
He left home and joined the army after he graduated from high school.
The company employs an army of lawyers to handle its legal affairs.
They sent in a whole army of trained technicians.
The organization was founded by a dedicated army of volunteers.

seeing all the above information shows me that there can't be such a thing as an " Army Of Two " there just can't/and there shouldn't ,it's an awful game .EA are trying to ride on the successful coat tails of the very dissapointing Call Of Duty franchise which is also crap.It's really only the sort of game that would appeal to someone that's warming themselves up before going out on a shooting spree in America,which is why I have to give it a big thumbs down.sorry to all the Army Of Two Fanboys out there sitting and crying in their basements/dungeons with all their Lord Of The Rings dolls/posters & World Of Warcraft memorabilia.......If I were you I'd stick to chess club.LOL.the game has really suffered aver the years since it's original release,the gameplay hasn't imoroved,if anything it's taken a serious decline & I'd be very surprised if anyone actually liked this game.if there are any 5 star reviews for this they will be sarcastic troll reviews.and that comes with a GamesMasterForLife seal of approval,something you know you can trust.the weapons are ,well there should be more weapons available for you to use,maybe throw in a couple of power ups or something just to make them a bit better., after all you can never have too much power,can you.the gameplay is a bit jittery.

Must try harder.

But don't worry because as my profile picture says :
Keep calm GamesMasterForLife knows best.

Ciao for now "Fanboys"

LOL :-)

Calm Down Son
Freedom Of Speech
Knows
Best


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