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Reviews Written by
dasbunker. carmarthen "dave smith" (carmarthen)

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Splice [DVD]
Splice [DVD]

4.0 out of 5 stars Better than I expected, 11 Mar. 2013
This review is from: Splice [DVD]
I was very pleasantly surprised by this film.I saw it on TV and watched it because Adrian Brody was in it. Very often with this type of Cloning Gone Wrong type of film, all you get is a plethora of fangs, claws and lots of gore. Not so with this one. The rapid life cycle of the cloned Dren (excellently acted) is intriguing and suspenseful. The moral doubts of the two scientists, who shouldn't have done it in the first place,are very well projected, and the finale is very satisfying, leaving much scope for a sequel. If you're a horror fan who revels in buckets of blood and messy death then you may be disappointed. However, if you want a thought provoking film, with a modicum of horror,excellent acting and a very controversial story line, then this is for you

The Guard Post [DVD] (2008)
The Guard Post [DVD] (2008)
Dvd ~ Chun Ho-jin
Offered by best_value_entertainment
Price: £2.73

2.0 out of 5 stars Confusion Abounds, 15 Feb. 2013
Verified Purchase(What is this?)
This review is from: The Guard Post [DVD] (2008) (DVD)
I really tried hard to like this film. It is well produced and acted, very atmospheric, and there's some nasty gore and effects on view.But what was it all about? Yes, I know (at least I THINK I know)some sort of killer virus has got loose in a subterraneum guard bunker in Korea.It makes people crazy and homicidal. A detachment of MPs arrive to investigate, and find only one survivor. Did he kill all the others? We keep going back to see the events that lead up to all the killing. Trouble is, to my Western eyes all the protagonists look pretty much the same, particularly in helmets, and I found it very hard to differentiate between the past and present.It was SO confusing.About 3/4 of the way in my viewing was interrupted and I had to swith off.Suffice it to say, that was 3 days ago and I haven't switched it back on yet!!

Skeleton Crew [DVD] [2008] [Region 1] [US Import] [NTSC]
Skeleton Crew [DVD] [2008] [Region 1] [US Import] [NTSC]
Price: £5.94

1.0 out of 5 stars Don't give up the day job., 29 Jan. 2013
Well, the other reviewer has said it all and there's little I can add, but I felt compelled to add my agreement to his scathing comments, because any deterrence I can profer to dissuade prospective buyers from wasting their money is time well spent. This is an awful film. The acting is beyond contempt and any sense of tension is totally lacking. I can only think the director, producer, cameraman, actors etc. are rank amateurs who, for a lark,decided to make a "Horror" film over a long weekend, and this is the result. Stick to what you do best guys, which must be ANYTHING other than film making. How it ever got a release I will never know. I give full marks to the other reviewer for determination - he obviously saw it to the end. I didn't, and neither will you if you are daft enough to spend money on this garbage!!

Zombie Women Of Satan [2009] [DVD]
Zombie Women Of Satan [2009] [DVD]
Dvd ~ Victoria Hopkins

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars An insult to Brit. indie cinema, 16 Jan. 2013
I don't expect a whole lot from B grade indie cinema, especially horror films. I do expect, however, to be mildly entertained at least. No such luck with this turkey. Along with other (intelligent) reviewers, I think this must be the worst film of its type I have ever seen. The characters are without any redeeming features, the acting is abysmal and the direction ludicrous. If you can find a laugh (or ANY emotion at all, apart from disgust) at a long lingering shot of a pile of steaming excreta, then this film is for you. Like another reviewer I switched off at this point so I dont know how it ended. Hopefully, everybody involved died a horrible death (in the film) and are never encouraged to make another film again. The aforementioned pile of ordure just about sums up my description of this film!!!

Rosewood Life-Like Human Skull Aquarium Decor
Rosewood Life-Like Human Skull Aquarium Decor
Price: £9.85

4.0 out of 5 stars Ideal for purpose, 14 Jan. 2013
Verified Purchase(What is this?)
I was very happy with this product. Delivery was quick and as an ornament for a fish tank it is excellent. Very realistic, and can, in fact, be used as an ornament out of a fish tank, as mine is used. I lose a star simply because it is not quite life size, but don't let this put you off. In the tank mode it has a hole in the top of the skull for fish to enter, and then exit through the eye sockets and nasal apperture. Highly recommended.

The Bridge [DVD] [1959]
The Bridge [DVD] [1959]
Dvd ~ Folker Bohnet
Offered by Sluagh62
Price: £24.99

3 of 4 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars Not as good as I remember, 14 Jan. 2013
This review is from: The Bridge [DVD] [1959] (DVD)
I first saw this film in the 1960s and was suitably impressed. It provided a telling antidote to the bravura and stiff upper lip of the many Brit war films of the day. However, as another reviewer has noted, it is very much of its day, and the battle scene leaves a lot to be desired. In retrospect, however,my main criticism is the time element. These 16 year old boys have been in the army ONE DAY. During that 24 hours they have been fully kitted out, learned close order drill, taught to strip and assemble their weapons and are competent in firing them. It took me about four weeks to attain thal level of competency during my early military service!! Not logical. Having said that, this is a poignant portrait of the youth of the Third Reich in the dying days of Nazi Germany. I still recommend it, but it definitely has its flaws.

Blackball [DVD] [2003]
Blackball [DVD] [2003]
Dvd ~ Paul Kaye
Offered by Bridge_Records
Price: £5.85

1 of 3 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Comedy? The Pits have been reached., 23 Dec. 2012
This review is from: Blackball [DVD] [2003] (DVD)
Right upfront, I have to admit I don't know Paul Kaye from a hole in the wall. They tell me he's a comedian. They are lying, or severely unhinged. The character he plays here is the most obnoxious, crass, unlikeable "hero" I have ever had the misfortune to see on film. As the "Bad boy" of the lawn bowls circuit, pitting himself against the establishment of polite bowling society and achieving media success, he could have come across as a thoroughly entertaining personality we can all root for. Instead, I hoped he'd be run over by a bus in the first 15 minutes! Mel Smith (who IS a funny man) directed this drivel. What happened Mel? You're a lot more sophisticated than this. It just isn't funny. For 60 minutes I didn't even crack a smile. I winced a lot, until, finally I had to switch it off. The film contains a gaggle of excellent Brit. character actors who are sorely mis-used, and I'll be willing to bet they don't include THIS film on their CV. If you're looking for the type of wit and comedy that we used to get from "Smith and Jones" then avoid this like the plague.

Hard Candy [DVD]
Hard Candy [DVD]
Dvd ~ Patrick Wilson
Offered by DVD Overstocks
Price: £2.42

6 of 13 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars How precocious can you get?, 19 Nov. 2012
This review is from: Hard Candy [DVD] (DVD)
After all the reviews seen above, I really have only one thing to add. This annoying young female is supposed to be 14 years old. Her dialogue and actions would stretch a well educated woman in her twenties! After 20 minutes of hearing her waffle on, I thought "I don't believe this." My grand daughter is 14, excellent at school,very forthcoming,and could NEVER, at this stage of her life,maintain dialogue like this. Also, this slim little girl manhandles an unconscious man into all sorts of positions, ties him up and suspends him from a noose. Actions of this nature would take at least two people to achieve, or at least a big strong guy. A waif like young girl would have no chance. Reality just went straight out of the window. On top of all this, this film has one other major fault. It's BORING. I only spent two quid on it from a charity shop. They are the only winners because they'll be getting it back. Take heed.

Huge [DVD]
Huge [DVD]
Dvd ~ Noel Clarke
Offered by Tom's Treasure
Price: £6.49

3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars How unfunny can you get?, 13 Nov. 2012
This review is from: Huge [DVD] (DVD)
Whilst fully appreciating that this was meant as an affectionate drama about a struggling stand-up comedy duo,I did expect, logically I think, some comedy. None was forthcoming. The two leads fast became very irritating to me. Their efforts at writing a comedy act, a la Morecombe and Wise, were pathetic to say the least. The fact that you don't get to see their act on stage is totally frustrating, although, in retrospect, perhaps it's a blessing. A very brief scene concerning a stand up performance from a lady comedian is excruciatingly unfunny. The fact that she wins through to the finals at the club just about sums up this film's idea of good comedy. I watched it with a poker face throughout, and,I have to admit, switched it off before the end.. A waste of everyone's time.

Triumph of the Spirit [1989] [DVD]
Triumph of the Spirit [1989] [DVD]
Dvd ~ Willem Dafoe

3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars An authentic view of the Holocaust, 31 Oct. 2012
If you have any interest at all in the Holocaust, then this film should be a Must See for you. Based on a true story, it follows the fortunes of a young Greek Jewish boxer and his family, deported to the Auschwitz/Birkenau complex in Poland. There, during an encounter with a Kapo on a work gang [the boxer knocks the kapo down] he catches the eye of a Nazi guard and is forced to fight in the ring against other prisoners. If he wins, he gets a loaf of bread. If he loses, he dies. There is a strong moral issue here. The opponents he wins against will all die as a result, but that loaf of bread he collects could well mean an extension of life for him and his ailing father. This film is very realistically done, with no compromise about the dire conditions at Auschwitz. It helps immensely that it was actually shot at Auschwitz/Birkenau. Willem Dafoe gives an outstanding performance as the boxer, and there is an excellent supporting cast.

One very minor quibble. The action occasionally jumps between exterior shots of Auschwitz 1 (Main Camp) and Birkenau (about 3 kilometres away] when it should be all within one location. I know this because I have been there and recognised the locations. Not worth bothering about. Pure nit picking on my part. If you want to be emotionally moved,, and witness once again man's inhumanity to man, watch this film. The closing shot will reduce you to fragments and sums up ideally the title of the film. Highly recommended.

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