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Boomerang Kids: A Revealing Look at Why So Many of Our Children Are Failing on Their Own, and How Parents Can Help Paperback – 1 Nov 2011
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""Timely and practical book...rife with useful life lessons."" - Publishers Weekly
""A must-read for any parent frustrated or heartbroken over their child's difficulties striking out on their own."" - Kirkus
""I imagine I will keep this book handy and refer back to it for years to come, as my husband and I move through this stage with our daughters. I can also see how it would be helpful to parents of younger adolescents, as it can help them understand some of what their children are going through and how that may play out in the future."" - Mother Daughter Book Club
""Will help postgrad kids handle the 11 most common challenges young people face, like managing increased freedom, unemployment, and broken romantic relationships."" - Library Journal
About the Author
Carl Pickhardt, PhD, is a psychologist in a private counseling practice. Dr. Pickhardt, whose books include Why Good Kids Act Cruel, The Connected Father, The Future of Your Only Child and Stop the Screaming, is married with four grown children and one grandchild. He lives in Austin, TX.
Most helpful customer reviews on Amazon.com
After borrowing the e-book version for my Kindle from our local library, I wound up buying it for my Kindle AND my husband bought a hard copy so we could read it together--yeah, it's that good! I hardly ever write reviews but the information in this book worked a miracles for us and it's the only way I can express my gratitude to Dr. Pickhardt. And don't let the title fool you--it's not just about kids moving back home--it's a "What to Expect" book for young adults.
Pickhardt does a wonderful job describing the reasons behind the 20 to 30 somethings and their procrastination, bad decision making, and terrible planning skills, as well as some other negative points. However, this book draws out the main causes and how to fix them before it is a problem. Pickhardt has broken this book down into stages that are very easy to understand and utilize. Most of the issues young people have today are emotionally based. Through having your children talk about their problems and express their anxieties, they tend to deal with independence much better. They are able to handle more stress and compute it correctly. He also shows how parents should and shouldn't support their children.
In encouraging children, teens, etc, to express themselves, they will then use those skills with their children, and help out other peers and so on and so forth. Thus creating a chain of happy, diligent, more independent young adults. I believe myself to be somewhat of a boomerang kid. I can handle things on my own, but when times get tough, it is almost like the carpet is pulled from under my feet and I end up struggling. I am not saying my parents didn't prepare me to be on my own, but some of these skills would have been nice to have. I am someone who keeps everything to myself instead of expressing my feelings/emotions. I am happy to have read this book, especially since both of my children have special needs. I am sure they will have a lot of struggles to deal with, and I hope to have the tools to help them make it. I want them to be able to live a healthy, happy life, of their own that is. I definitely recommend this book to any parent that has a child from grade school to even the older 30 year old that needs help. I believe it is never too late to try to make things better.
**Disclosure: I received a copy of Boomerang Kids By: Carl Pickardt for review purposes. No other compensation was received.
During adolescence and young adulthood, the parts of the brain contributing to the presentation of the emotional and reasonable mind are developing at different levels: the emotional parts of the brain (limbic regions) develop faster than the reasonable part (prefrontal regions). The reasonable parts of the mind catch up later in development. The imbalance of this growth is proposed to result in risky choices and impulsive behaviors. Thus, it is important during this stage of development for parents to foster the balancing of these parts of the brain by helping their children use both emotional and rational thought processes in decision making.
Thus, I recommend that the Parenting Prescriptions for Chapter 10 read as follows:
Getting counseling help. Support your child's getting counseling to learn from emotional crisis, and respect his or her privacy in getting that help.
Integrating thinking and feeling. Encourage your child to make decisions by integrating thinking and feeling in their decision making process.
Changing the emotional context. Teach your child skills and strategies to quiet their minds, calm their bodies, and identify and manage their emotions effectively.
A book that offers techniques on building emotional intelligence in children, including adolescence and young adulthood is Building Emotional Intelligence: Techniques to Cultivate Inner Strength in Children by Lantieri and Goleman.