on 18 May 2008
I came across this book outside of Amazon.xxx, and it has been the first and only book that has helped me understand the trust issues that plague trauma victims. I have some experience of this myself, and found the author understood me surprisingly well without ever lecturing me. The author offers comprehensive questionnaires and exercises, and discusses the wide range of coping behaviours, issues and mind-sets that are obviously gleaned from much experiential work with trauma sufferers. Her style is readable, measured and highly compassionate: it never blames, derides or cajoles.
This is important: I find too many self-help books written by people with one-track pet theories and a desire to jump on the latest gravy train without actually doing the real work. Therefore - and especially in an area that requires the fundamental earning of trust - these authors are irresponsible in the effects of their pet claims on vulnerable people. People suffering trauma need to be understood and treated authentically.
This book does just that, in my experience.
It is not patronising, not Pollyanna, not Newage, and not arrogant about a "solution". It comes across balanced, experienced and helpful. I found it helped me with many aspects of my relating to others within my own process, and enables me to have a means and a sense of dignity to share and explain what goes on for me, as well as practical tools for healing. I truly recommend it. This is my first ever review, so please judge by that my rating of this author.
on 9 December 2015
As a grown women still struggling from childhood trauma, this book make sense. Aphrodite Matsakis has huge amount of knowledge, and the theory is anchored in both her own practice and from research (ex.Van der Kolk). The book contains a lot of information about trauma, PTSD and being a survivor, but also topics that I have never dealt with or thought about before, wich are very important, for example about secondary wounding or how to assess trustworthiness. And also about how your loved ones can set of your triggers, and how to deal with it.
I am glad I bought this book. It is an important part of my healing process.
Do note the "Cautions" on page 10. It is not an easy book to read, it can be both triggering and overwhelming.
Good luck everybody! We all have great healing potential!