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|Print List Price:||£7.99|
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How To Think More About Sex (The School of Life Book 4) Kindle Edition
|Length: 161 pages||Word Wise: Enabled||Enhanced Typesetting: Enabled|
|Page Flip: Enabled||
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Whilst I may not be prepared to go as far as to say I didn't like the book, I didn't like de Botton's view, for a number of reasons:
1. It was pretty much entirely heteronormative in its approach.
2. It was pretty much sold on the concept of coupledom and monogomy - no mention of polyamory, for example, and only the briefest of mentions of Open Relationships.
3. He had a limited and shallow discussion of fetishes, and these were of the mild kind.
4. His approach to pornography was puritanical.
Rather than a discussion of ways of thinking about sex, and its role in our lives, relationships and society, this was a lesson in de Botton's own thoughts about sex in heterosexual relationships.
I would guess that most people are perplexed as to why sex does not work out for them as they had hoped, then they need to read this.
I appreciate that labelling a book like this a polemic may put off readers but AdB has a poet's gift of expression and writes with disarming accessibility. There are also many lyrical passages which demand to be re-read for the sheer enjoyment of his style of expression.
Hard to think how the rest of the titles in this series can possibly live up to this.
I am a fan of Alain de Botton and find the tone in his books and essays to be measured and even and really do recommend this and other readings of his work.
Alain de Botton takes us on an unusual journey into the world of sex. But less of a teenage-snickering-at-rude-words venture or a "sexpert" telling us how mastery of the lotus position is the solution to all our sexual woes (I did chuckle at Alain's remarks to this very notion) - more a thoughtful glance from a completely different perspective. Philosophy and sex. Not a normal combination, I give you that... but Mr de Botton is frighteningly on the ball with a number of his observations, and paints a rather stark view of sex. His theories into eroticism and the lack of desire were particularly interesting
His tone is dry, yet charming. It's a bit dark but laced elegantly with some lashings of good humour and a fair amount of tongue-in-cheek to boot. His obsession with art, however, grated somewhat... Trudging through a whimsical, yet painfully detailed, fascination with a painting of a woman (personally I thought it was a creepy sort of painting I'd see in a Count Dracula's Castle), how the biblical Madonna is somewhat sexually alluring (The original MILF, I guess) and how our fascination with art depicts our sexual interests.
On a number of occasions I found that he barely skimmed the surface of a topic, or I challenged the idea and wanted more explanation - but was disappointed not to see him explore them further. Some topics weren't even graced with a mention at all - such as social attitudes to sex (i.e. Why are men and women judged so differently in terms of their sexual behaviours)... which left the book feeling a bit bare. It was like I went to a fancy restaurant and left after having the Starters. Lovely starter for sure... just not truly satisfying. It felt more like an introduction than a comprehensive look at sexuality and sexual attitudes
Overall, it wasn't a bad read. It's a quirky title that brings some interesting ideas to the fray... but as stated by another reviewer: It's more of a long essay than a book
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