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22 Things a Woman Must Know: If She Loves a Man With Asperger's Syndrome Paperback – 15 May 2009

4.2 out of 5 stars 68 customer reviews

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Frequently bought together

  • 22 Things a Woman Must Know: If She Loves a Man With Asperger's Syndrome
  • +
  • The Other Half of Asperger Syndrome (Autism Spectrum Disorder): A Guide to Living in an Intimate Relationship with a Partner who is on the Autism Spectrum
  • +
  • The Asperger Couple's Workbook: Practical Advice and Activities for Couples and Counsellors
Total price: £36.97
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Product description

Review

"There are many books that have been written about being in a relationship with a man with AS, but I have found none to be as insightful, accurate and understanding of both perspectives as this book by Rudy Simone. Each section of the book says it just the way it is; it is realistic, positive and unbiased." --From the Foreword by Maxine Aston, author of The Other Half of Asperger Syndrome, Aspergers in Love and The Asperger Couples Workbook.

Review

A specialized book that will bring solace and encouragement to women in relationships with AS men. (Library Journal)

There are many books that have been written about being in a relationship with a man with AS, but I have found none to be as insightful, accurate and understanding of both perspectives as this book by Rudy Simone. Each section of the book says it just the way it is; it is realistic, positive and unbiased. (From the Foreword by Maxine Aston, author of The Other Half of Asperger Syndrome, Aspergers in Love and The Asperger Couples Workbook)

The book is concise, well written, and an invaluable reference to women who are struggling in a marriage or dating relationship with an Asperger's man. (Autism and Asperger Syndrome Blog)

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Customer Reviews

Top Customer Reviews

By Georgie on 14 Jun. 2017
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
Good book, describes my boyfriend to a tee, i have suspected that he has AS although he is adamant that he doesn't
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I feel like this woman has been a fly on the wall in my life for the past two years. I can't believe how much my experiences of the characteristics of my AS man match the traits described here - things he does which are described exactly as I have experienced them, right down to specific things he has said to me which are quoted almost word-for-word! This book could've been written entirely about him.

When I first met him I was so confused, lonely and, to be honest, frightened because I lacked understanding of why he was behaving in such an alarming manner - the shock the author describes is so accurate, I have been utterly astounded on many occasions where his behaviour was so unexpected and seemingly unconnected with its origins that I have been left speechless. Now that I know there are many other women out there (and perhaps men) who share my experiences, it puts a totally different perspective on my situation and I hope I can now move forward (with him or otherwise, as I simply don't know how it will play out).

Thank you so much, Rudy, for this amazing book, you have made an invaluable contribution towards the world's understanding of this condition and to increased tolerance and compassion towards people whose minds work in unique ways. It is true that, whilst I have been to hell and back in my relationship with this person, I have also found heaven in ways that I have never experienced in my conventional relationships and I am totally captivated by him - his talents, passion, mystery, vulnerability - and I am profoundly in love with him.
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I sat and cried for the hour it took me to read and absorb this book. It described exactly how bad I felt as living with someone suspected of having aspergers is extremely upsetting and lonely with having no idea why. I thought there was something wrong with myself but it was just a reaction to the brutal way people with aspergers can talk without realising they are doing it. the hardest part for a woman to deal with is the lack of feeling when she is upset as they simply dont recognise body language or expression of feelings

This has inspired me to look further into aspergers and have ordered aspergers for dummies to try and understand further. My son is also on the autistic spectrum so with all the help i am getting for him hopefully he will have less struggles and be able to cope with relationships as he gets older
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Excellent views of a wife or partner of an Aspie.
A wife's feelings and emotions are mostly not believed nor listened to, when she is often screaming inside with frustration and desperation.
She is so often considered to be neurotic, and gets no understanding whatsoever.

The man - so often charming and affable to strangers, family or friends on the surface, is always believed and given every consideration with empathy. Really a great guy, so what's the wife's problem ........... ? Rudy Simone has captured it!
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I've been reading the reviews for this book and agree with the customer who said that they sat and cried after reading it - although the reason behind my tears was somewhat different.

I was looking for more information and advice on Asperger's Syndrome as a way to help me better understand and communicate with my partner when I came across this book. At first glance I thought it was perfect but as I began reading I was greatly mistaken.

This has got to be one of the most offensive things I have ever read. Rudy Simone's generalisations left me doubting everything I knew about my partner and resulted in a distressing conversation where I was inconsolable for more time than this book is worth.

For each point she makes she seems to dwell on the negatives for several pages and then puts a sentence or two of something supposedly positive at the end.

My advice to anyone considering buying this book is: DON'T! There are far better books out there than this garbage written by what sounds like a bitter woman who didn't get what she was looking for in her own relationship.

I returned this to Amazon immediately for a refund and would encourage others not to waste their money on this sensationalised nonsense.
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More of an extended article. Far too expensive for what it is. This information can be found online on various websites.
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This book really scared me! I had started dating a man with Aspergers syndrome and wanted to know what to expect, this was like a horror story!! Luckily as time has passed I have discovered that most of this doesn't apply to my relationship, My boyfriend does do PDA's, he does communicate. Some of it is true but if I had taken the book as a whole seriously I probably would have run for the hills! Also it doesn't give any indication what so ever on how to handle the various challenges presented, it is more likely to scare you to death and leave you feeling helpless. I even began to wonder during this book if the author was simply experiencing an abusive relationship, rather than someone with a disorder.
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