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4.5 out of 5 stars
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4.5 out of 5 stars
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on 28 August 2012
With my son about to depart for Uni and a daughter only a couple of years behind, I felt as though I needed a bit of guidance through this period of immense change. I am incredibly close to both my kids and bringing them up through a whole host of difficulties has been the most fulfilling part of my life. Even though I work and have a great marriage, I knew that in the next couple of weeks there was going to be a large void appearing in my life. Then I discovered "The Empty Nest" ....

To be frank, up until the point of delving into this book I had considered myself to be over-sentimental and a bit of an idiot for feeling so unbelievably sad at the prospect of my son's departure. What made it worse was that even though on the outside he was thrilled and excited about leaving for a new chapter in his life, I could tell he was panicking. After reading the first few chapters, however, I realised that all these emotions were not the ridiculous rantings of an overly clingy parent, but that they were actually normal feelings and were to be expected. All the case study examples were excellent, giving the points of view of both the parents and young adults and also comments from professionals such as university pastoral care and family psychologists.

This book is so easy to read, partly because of its practical, straight to the point advice, but also because you immediately relate to everything in it and feel that you are not alone. It was as though I was reading word for word the thoughts and feelings going on in my head and somebody saying "that's ok, you're not daft you're a great Mum". I would recommend this book to any parent, who after years of wishing that the kids would give them a bit of peace and quiet, suddenly would do anything to hear themselves shout "TURN THAT DOWN!"
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on 10 November 2011
I would highly recommend this book for anyone negotiating this wrenching period. I was particularly heartened to read the interviews with other parents who felt just as bereft as I was when my teenagers left for university -- it was hugely comforting to know I wasn't the only one poleaxed by the sight of an empty bed. Not that this is a gloomy book -- far from it. Full of empathy and practical suggestions even for those (like me) who find their kids have boomeranged back.
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on 9 January 2012
As a life and careers coach in Sheffield, and with a son about to leave home for a gap year, I asked my friends what they were feeling as their kids planned to leave for uni! I was astounded at their range of emotions,and we set up an EmptyNesterClub to plan some 'pampering', fun events and celebrating our handiwork ,and re-inventing ourselves. I then googled to find some advice ,as you do and found this book ! It was perfect ,with really good advice to help plan IN ADVANCE how to deal with your emotions ,and then prepare for the process of leaving with lots of practical advice.
It's brilliant,and i would buy it in the Spring before they leave ,and have it to hand to help you through the first Christmas they come back ,with their washing . I am recommending it to coaching clients ,and the Empty nesters have all borrowed or bought it !! Great book !! See the book in action on our facebook page [...]
NB faffytat is my e-bay name .
Karen Perkins
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on 5 August 2013
I thought nothing would help - but this book did - I read it through once and felt a lot better and am now reading it again and underlining things - sometimes the tiniest detail just helps so much and is exactly how I feel. Do get it!
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on 30 October 2015
Bought it for a friends wife and family. she didnt read much it, listened to my take on it and her family; found it as very useful and comforting and I found myself homeless for the next 5 months after I left their home. She liked me more than the book so I ran. Might sue the author and publisher yet.
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on 20 October 2015
So pleased I found this book, it has mehelped hugely with the transition from 'Mum of 3 children' to 'Mum of 2 children and an adult'. I couldn't believe how my emotions floored me; I work full time and still have 2 at home, and wasn't prepared for the sense of loss of my family unit, and sense of self. To read this and understand I wasn't alone or abnormal, and to read other perspectives has been so helpful.
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on 20 November 2011
With one boy in his second year at university and one still in sixth form, I am just at the beginning of this period of children leaving and I found this book really helpful in making me think about what might happen..and how I should approach it. i liked the interviews with the parents and with the children (particularly the latter)as they made me consider what my own sons may be feeling. Being boys perhaps they tell me less than girls might; and it is hard to get much out of them about their feelings. So this book was really helpful in making me think about what they may be feeling. I did find it very moving in parts and found myself in tears on the bus to my great surprise; it was the shock of recognising that so many of my experiences are common to other parents.I think the book recognises that everyone is different, but there are common threads.And,contrary to what the other reviewer said,I think it is particularly helpful at the moment when adult children may well be returning home for an indefinite period, not planned, and going through a really hard time trying to find work. A book that gives you a lot in a very easy to read and simple though not simplistic way
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on 12 August 2013
my son suddenly left home when he turned 18. He only moved 3 miles away to stay with his dad, but it could just as well have been 300 miles. I wish I had known about this syndrome before and I could have been more prepared. This is an excellent book and easy to read. Written through actual experiences of both the parents and the children leaving home.
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on 24 December 2014
I sent this to my brother when his son went to university. I think he has found it very useful. Anything that can give information or support to those who are affected are a must have, rather than suffering and thinking nothing will ever change.
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on 15 September 2014
Excellent book. Really helped me through a very difficult period. I had thought I was the only one experiencing all the thoughts and feelings that go with your child leaving home and this really helped. The true stories from the contributors and the author are spot on. Highly recommended.
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