- Paperback: 378 pages
- Publisher: Tarcher (2 Aug. 2012)
- Language: English
- ISBN-10: 1585429368
- ISBN-13: 978-1585429363
- Product Dimensions: 15.2 x 2.6 x 22.8 cm
- Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars See all reviews (14 customer reviews)
- Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 134,340 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
It's Ok Not to Share and Other Renegade Rules for Raising Competent and Compassionate Kids Paperback – 2 Aug 2012
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"Rarely do parenting books trigger in me an exhale. But the title alone for Heather Shumaker's new book came like that rare August breeze."
-The Washington Post "On Parenting"
"An insightful, sensible and compassionate book full of downright revolutionary ideas."
"Brilliant. . . . It's OK Not to Share is an enlightening book that will make you take a second look at everything you believe."
"Did you read the title and think, what the heck? Me, too. Not only did I read it to figure out the title, I underlined about a third-it's that good."
-Melissa Taylor, ImaginationSoup.net
"What an amazing book! [Shumaker] challenge[s] the parenting myths and fallacies that our society has embraced for so long."
-Provider Resource Organization
"A breath of fresh air."
-Jane Pratt, founder of xoJane.com
"These 'renegade rules' will resonate with what you know to be true, speak to what you want most for your children, and teach you how to achieve it. Don't let this one slip off your reading list."
-Dr. Becky Bailey, author of Conscious Discipline and Easy to Love, Difficult to Discipline
"This beautifully written book. . . provides immediate, sanity-saving answers to tough parenting questions. I highly recommend it."
-Michael Gurian, author of The Wonder of Boys and The Good Son
"From 'Bombs, Guns, and Bad Guys Allowed' to '"I Hate You!" Is Nothing Personal, ' the table of contents alone is music to my ears. Heather Shumaker is a healthy mom I can relate to-and I'll bet you will too, when you hear out her logic."
-Paula Spencer Scott, author of Momfidence!
"A refreshing change from the usual admonitions. . . Shumaker's Renegade Rules are based on what children really need."
-Lawrence J. Cohen, author of Playful Parenting
"Shumaker beautifully shows us why letting kids be kids may be the single most important thing we can do as parents."
-Anthony T. DeBenedet, M.D. coauthor of The Art of Roughhousing
"A must-read for parents and teachers. This is a book you will want with you all the time."
-Daniel Hodgins, author of Boys: Changing the Classroom, Not the Child
"A no-nonsense commonsense appraoch. . . As you read this book, you will begin to feel the stress of parenting melt away."
-Vivian Kirkfield, PositiveParentalParticipation.com
About the Author
Heather Shumaker is a journalist whose writing has appeared in Parenting, Pregnancy, Organic Gardening, and other publications. A frequent speaker on parenting topics and an advocate for free, unstructured play in homes and schools, she has a special passion for nonprofits; before turning to writing full-time, she worked for The Nature Conservancy, Audubon Society, Hudson River Sloop Clearwater, and many others. She holds an MS degree from the Institute for Environmental Studies at University of Wisconsin-Madison, and a BA from Swarthmore College. Heather makes her home in northern Michigan, with her husband, three chickens, and two children.
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Top Customer Reviews
I mentioned the book's ideas on 'not sharing' with my closest friend, whose son is also 2, and we practised the author's advice. We noticed immediately that it worked. The children were willing to talk to each other (we gave them the words) and respect their own agreement to take turns. And it removed all confrontation that might be felt between parents because what we were doing was getting the children to talk to each other (rather than giving out orders). Both children felt respected & safe to play with a toy until 'done'.
After that, we broached the subject to other parents who we met with, when we found that they had the same problems over sharing (when to say something, forcing your child to 'share' their toys when they weren't done to appease another parent/child etc). They were open to trying the technique but doubted their child's willingness to co-operate. They were then amazed to see their child accept the final outcome (usually without tears or frustration).
Of course, there are other topics discussed in the book, which are very interesting & offer the same level of common sense. But I bought it for the chapter on sharing & was not disappointed.
Most importantly: does it work? Stunningly, and somewhat to my surprise, results were as promised, within two or three days.
There is one rule: it's ok as long as it's not hurting people or property. So glad I bought this book!
Most Recent Customer Reviews
Loved this book so much. So helpful , I will refer to this for years to come. Three more wordsPublished 13 months ago by Kindle Customer
A fascinating and thought-provoking book which challenges any parent in their child-rearing practices.Published 13 months ago by Richard
Interesting and refreshing, would recommend this book to anyone interested in child development.Published on 27 Dec. 2014 by G. montrose
The title is obviously deliberately catchy; I cannot possibly recall how many times I have heard parents tell their toddlers "You have to share" almost always for something that... Read morePublished on 18 Oct. 2014 by Celi