Sex and the Psyche: The Truth About Our Most Secret Fantasies Paperback – 7 Feb 2008
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`A book people pick up and don't want to give back' -- Evening Standard
`A mesmerizing compendium' -- Time Out
`The new Kinsey ... Brett Kahr has uncovered the fantasies that fuel our sex lives, and what they tell us about ourselves' -- Observer
About the Author
Brett Kahr is Senior Clinical Research Fellow in Psychotherapy and Mental Health at the Centre for Child Mental Health in London, and the Winnicott Clinic Senior Research Fellow at the Winnicott Clinic of Psychotherapy. Having worked for many years as a Registered Psychotherapist and as a Registered Couple Psychoanalytic Psychotherapist, he recognised the need for a full-scale research study on the origins and functions of sexual fantasy. The results of his five-year research project form the basis of this book. Additionally, he is Visiting Clinician and Lecturer at the Tavistock Centre for Couple Relationships at the Tavistock Institute of Medical Psychology, and the Chair of the Society of Couple Psychoanalytic Psychotherapists. He maintains a private practice for individuals and couples in North London.
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Top Customer Reviews
I was annoyed by the first part of the book, when describing the methodology and antecedents it was far too story like and not enough straight reportage. There were too many adjectives about "courageous" Kinsey and "brave" Nancy Friday. Really, these researchers from decades ago were just doing a job they got paid for. Bravery and courage had nothing to do with it. The overuse of adjectives aside, the text is readable.
The meat of the book, which is the fantasies and their interpretation, is best left to the reader, as it is too fascinating, fabulous and occasionally humorous. That people have fantasies, I have no doubt. What I do find a weakness in method, is the type of people who divulge fantasies freely may be already of a certain disposition or wanting to make a certain pre-conceived point. I know that Kahr has tried to counter this as best he can through YouGov, but throughout my reading there was always a doubt nagging me about the good faith of some contributors. I think only more surveys will actually prove or disprove the results. My second problem with the contents is the Freudian emphasis on the origins of fantasy being the result of trauma - that is trauma defines what our fantasies will be like. I find the weakness here is that people's fantasies change over time.Read more ›
I suspect people without experience of psychotherapy will find the Freudian concepts here a lot to swallow at first glance!
The book is just amazing - I literally couldn't put it down. I mean, I don't put books down anyway, but this book I *extra* couldn't put down. I should have been working, but I was reading, because I had to.
I learned why I fantasize about what I fantasize about - I saw exactly where those thoughts came from. I now understand; and I got that from this book.