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Reading People: How to Understand People and Predict Their Behaviour Anytime, Anyplace Paperback – 29 Apr 1999
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"Secret tips from the country's leading jury consultant that will change your life." (Larry King)
"A WEALTH OF TIPS AND STRATEGIES for ferreting out people's real viewpoints, motives, and character traits. . . . Whether interviewing a baby-sitter, meeting a new date, or selecting a jury, this thorough, detailed guide of what to look for could probably improve anyone's ability at seeing and being seen." (Publishers Weekly)
"[A] VALUABLE GUIDE . . . Practical, good advice for discerningly 'reading' others and becoming more aware of the myriad of nonverbal messages one conveys." (Kirkus Reviews)
This text teaches the reader: how to tell a person's sincerity by the tone of their voice; which three character traits are most likely to predict a person's behaviour; how to know if your date is interested in a serious relationship; and the message you are sending with your hairstyle.
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Growing up in a large family and with mother saying seen but not heard you actually know what some grown-ups are abot to say and their reactions to conversations.
The book covers subjects such as: Discovering Patterns Reading Physical Apperance and Body Language, Seeing People in Context, Learning to Ask the Right Questions, Spotting Exceptions to the Rules, The Power of Intuition, How others Reading You, Having to make snap decisions.
Rather than in pure academic style, the book is written for the non-academic reader and easy to understand. There are many examples in every chapter which makes it an interesting read. Most of her examples come from her practice in jury selection, but she says that her advice can be used for anything in daily life where we have to 'read' people, for example people you are working with in the office, employing a baby sitter for the evening, possible partners. One of the recurring theme is that whatever you may think or infer from certain signs / behaviour, there could always be different reasons. So this 'Reading People' thing is not that easy and always open to interpretation. For example, imagine the boss who has pictures of his wife/children and children's drawings in his office. One can infer that this person is very much family oriented and does a lot with his children. Or maybe he isn't and just wants to give the impression that he is. Or maybe it's not even his family pictures, because he may just be using someone else's office for the week.
Some of the things are very obvious, such as slurred speech for for alcohol and drug use. Red eyes, bags under the eyes - but his could also be completely innocent, but could not be. The book passed one important 'test' for me: I like to cross my arms across my chest. In many books I read on similar topics, it is always said that this is a clear sign of the person being a 'closed' person, doesn't want to let anybody in and is probably trying to hide something. From my personal experience - rubbish. I like sitting that way because I'm usually always cold! The author does recognise this.
Did I learn anything groundbreakingly new? Probably not. I suppose it did make me more aware of people around me and signs they can give out. However, nothing is written in stone, so a particular thing could mean this or that or nothing at all. So it's up to your own observing and investigating skills.
"how to know if your date is interested in a serious relationship"
"how to tell a person's sincerity"
"how to make snap decisions that make sense"
I sure that Dr. Dimitrius is a very compelling and charming woman, but to be honest, the expose she was determined to avoid would have probably been more interesting and informative than this book. Anyone should know that there is no "secret" to "unlock" about people reading. It is just a matter of being around people enough to learn to observe the right signs. This is pretty much what she says in her book . . . over and over and over . . .
So, if you want 281 pages of common sense and suggestions to do more research, check this book out from your local library. Take your kids to the museum with the money you would have spent on it.
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