Borne straight from the pits of Hell, Lucy Swan began a life of chaotic mischief from the outset.
At the age of 2, she and her crew of toddler mercenaries were able to steal the Crown Jewels, use them as play props for a day and return them without anyone knowing.
At aged 14, the teenage Ms Swan attempted to crash a stolen 747 into the side of a bouncy castle for a giggle but found herself distracted by a team of super sexy ninja elves who recruited her into the newly formed Ministry of Chaos where she worked in secret as a fictional double agent for The Dreamlands.
After a tragic clown related accident at the age of 22, however, Lucy Swan disappeared from the world for over a decade before rejoining it in 2015, having found herself the proud author of a collection of short stories called The Dead Tell Tales.
In between random flights of fantasy, she is working on changing the world one idea at a time and if she can write a story or two amidst this busy schedule of daydreaming then she’ll consider exchanging them for money/food/drugs/sexual favours/first born children/souls/Pokemon/Beanie Babies/empty sugar packets.