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How to win friends and influence people by [Dale Carnegie]
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How to win friends and influence people Kindle Edition

4.6 out of 5 stars 1,152 customer reviews

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Length: 276 pages Word Wise: Enabled Enhanced Typesetting: Enabled
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Amazon Review

This grandfather of all people-skills books was first published in 1937. It was an overnight hit, eventually selling 15 million copies. How to Win Friends and Influence People is just as useful today as it was when it was first published, because Dale Carnegie had an understanding of human nature that will never be outdated. Financial success, Carnegie believed, is due 15 percent to professional knowledge and 85 percent to "the ability to express ideas, to assume leadership and to arouse enthusiasm among people." He teaches these skills through underlying principles of dealing with people so that they feel important and appreciated. He also emphasises fundamental techniques for handling people without making them feel manipulated. Carnegie says you can make someone want to do what you want them to by seeing the situation from the other person's point of view and "arousing in the other person an eager want." You learn how to make people like you, win people over to your way of thinking, and change people without causing offence or arousing resentment. For instance: "Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers" and "talk about your own mistakes before criticising the other person." Carnegie illustrates his points with anecdotes of historical figures, leaders of the business world and everyday folks. --Joan Price

Review

"it changed my life" (Warren Buffet)

"The most successful self-help book of all time... Carnegie has never seemed more relevant" (The Times)

"It's helped me immeasurably in life. I think everyone should read it" (Jenny Colgan, Independent on Sunday)

"a no-nonsense guide to being a better person...an easy-to-read, practical guide" (Spirit and Destiny)

Product details

  • Format: Kindle Edition
  • File Size: 1126 KB
  • Print Length: 276 pages
  • Publisher: Om Books International (1 Feb. 2016)
  • Sold by: Amazon Media EU S.à r.l.
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B01H38S9FY
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Word Wise: Enabled
  • Screen Reader: Supported
  • Enhanced Typesetting: Enabled
  • Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars 1,152 customer reviews
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: #1,067 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

Top Customer Reviews

Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
Have you ever met someone that immediately made you feel at ease? Have you ever met someone who seems so pleasant and makes you genuinely feel good about yourself? Or someone that makes you feel inspired? Or someone who gives you confidence?
We probably all have at one time or another; and they've probably read this book! The easy-going, anecdotal style enables the reader to quickly understand the principles behind all all aspects of human interaction, and put into operation the principles in the book.
I used to be fairly confrontational and self-centred. If you stick to the principles in the book, you will notice that people become more co-operative, friendly, and you genuinely appreciate you more. And it's really easy to follow these simple rules because they make so much sense.
I didn't read the book to make friends (I've got loads already, honest!), but you do find people genuinely being more friendly towards you and listening to your point of view.
I think everyone should read this book. The title has become a bit of a catch phrase and a cliche, but it hasn't sold 16 million copies for nothing.
Buy it. Read it. And you'll probably end up recommending it to someone else.
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By Donald Mitchell HALL OF FAMETOP 1000 REVIEWERVINE VOICE on 13 May 2004
Format: Mass Market Paperback
In business, those who are the most "emotionally" intelligent always rise to the top. Why is that?
As a management consultant, I am always asking our clients and potential clients what their major issues are. It almost always boils down to persuading someone else to change. In many situations, the person describes the situation as getting worse rather than better.
As I ask more questions, I soon learn that the person I am talking to is totally thinking about the issue from her or his perspective, not the perspective of the person they want to influence. Carnegie describes a situation where he and his son couldn't get a calf into the barn. They pushed and pulled, and nothing worked. A maid came out, stuck her finger into the calf's mouth to simulate feeding and the calf followed her right into the barn.
As you can tell from that example, Carnegie is a student of the stimulus-response school of human behavior. The book is divided into four sections: Handling People; Getting People to Like You; Getting People to Agree with You; and Being a Leader. Each section is comprised of a few principles, which are each exemplified in a short chapter with a number of examples. Handling people has to do with avoiding the negative and unpleasant, appreciating the other person, and making the other person eager to accomplish some goal of their own.
Each section follows the same format. Basically, it's the same way that you train any living being. You provide positive feedback to the person which makes them feel better, the person responds positively to you making you feel better, you then help the other person to link what you want to share with them with something they want.
Many people will be offended by this idea.
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Format: Paperback
It is a great shame Dale Carnegie is no longer around. As mentioned in the foreword, he liked to constantly update and hone his material. And that's one thing I feel is missing here. I'd love to see this renewed and sharpened in the wake of the changes that have occurred in the 80-od years since its first print. The foundation is there and its principles superb - but the wrinkles are getting obvious, especially where any marketing team with a library card have abused much of this book to the hilt

The most poignant element of this book is simply its constant focus on positive reinforcement. It's a stark reminder of how undervalued this has become, and how belligerence is still the common currency of interactions. It's quite incredible with the age of the writing how relevant many of the ideas remain. Dale's elegant analysis of the futility of arguments, how people respond to blame and the obsession with being right... sheer brilliance!

My main disagreement with the book is simply a moral one. I feel that a lot of the techniques and examples rewarded immature behaviour in other people. Fragile egos are protected and stroked - with bizarre examples of people responding with outright hostility to simple factual correction. Rude, belligerent individuals are given special attention and a pat on the head. I'm a big disbeliever in the notion of ingratiating yourself to immature people, simply so that you can keep their custom or get them to hire you. And there is a lot of that here... that and the common example of "So I had a big meeting and asked about their rock collection. 3 hours later they still hadn't shut up about limestone"

So much so, I find that you really need to calibrate the execution of Dale's techniques with precision.
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By SwiftFit on 10 Mar. 2017
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
Honestly this book is amazing. The principles are very simple but once you understand them they are amazing when put into practice. You start to notice these principles in every day life and think "how did I not realise this" . I have already recommeneded this book to a number of my friends.
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Format: Paperback
For a number of years I passed on reading Carnegie's work. The primary reason being that having dealt with a few people who did things the 'Carnegie way' I felt very uncomfortable with the kind of people they had become. One could easily argue they would have been those kinds of people with or without a Carnegie course and a paperback, and that's a reasonably sustainable argument. The problem really is though, that this book was clearly written by an American for an American audience (in 1936!); I know that is not the sales line but it is the truth. Henceforth, when the 'techniques' are applied to just about every culture outside of the United States then they have all the uncomfortableness of a brash woman wearing too much make-up, they ring too false and look too ridiculous. Maybe my comments will be seem by some as 'European elitism', but it's not that at all, it's simply a point of appropriation. A good number of what Carnegie talks about would simply laughed off in Europe as utterly banal and superficially repulsive - even if it were said or done with all sincerity. In my experience the over-use of names, the false enquiring of one's health, the formulaic compassion, the absurdity of remembering that your prospect ate chicken for dinner when you last met; and doesn't even remember that himself etc. is just too feigned and fictitious as to become repulsive. Likewise the whole notion that you can ask someone to do something if you simply spin them round, or that you should never berate people is poor psychology indeed. I agree that ONLY beration is unproductive but to motivate and challenge people of substance you need to raise the bar and use BOTH the twin tools of carrot AND the stick.Read more ›
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