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on 25 March 2001
We had read Dr. Federici's book before and after the recent BBC-Horizons show "Taming The Problem Child" and there was just no comparison. The show left out all of the essence of Dr. Federici's work with very troubled children. We have a very damaged child adopted from Romania that no one here in the UK was able to help. We went from specialist to specialist and were told to be "better parents", given Ritalin (which made him worse), and were ready to give up until we read this book and actually corresponded directly with the author. This book is very safe, family-friendly, practical and thorough. It gave us more meaningful information in 200 pages than all the other Psychologists and Psychiatrists we had visited in the UK over the past five years. We needed something and someone who understood the plight of the family at their wits end. NOWHERE in his book, writings, or conversations with Dr. Federici was there anything that could have been construed as aggressive or hurtful as the BBC Show seemed to show only bits and pieces of a very systematic and compassionate treatment plan that was extremely effective for our child (age seven),and for our family. We only wish that we had this type of professional guidance and book at the early stages of our journey for help. It is a book long overdue in our social medical-psychiatric system that many of the professionals (including the critics on the BBC show) could learn from. We hope there is a Volume Two. As for the skeptical reader, pick it up and see for yourself. We are appreciative and a bit upset that the show did not portray the true "program" to help troubled children.
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on 25 March 2001
After watching the BBC-Horizon show recently which focused on this author's work, we immediately got this book. There was so much important material left out during the show. We have struggled with out two children with severe conduct and behavioural problems for years and this book gave us hope, support and an organized plan that was not, in the least bit, hurtful or damaging as was portrayed in the show. We had heard Dr. Federici lecture in the UK/Ireland before and he showed great compassion and understanding of these difficult children, and the family under stress. We had begun to use some of his practical ideas before even buying the book which helped immensly. After reading and re-reading his book, we have begun an even more organized treatment program at home and even our psychologist agrees that it is safe and not what was portrayed in a recent BBC show but it certainly taught us how to deal with two aggressive and assaultive children who have hurt us and friends multiple times. There was nothing inappropriate about this book or procedures as the British doctors had claimed in the commentary on the show--they obviously had not read the book at all. It is unfortunate that there cannot be a better collaboration between people like Dr. Federici who really helped us (with his book and e-mail contacts), and many of the academic types who told us that they were not sure what to do with our sons. We were not desparate-just in need of help and we found it abroad. We just wish the book had more chapters on dealing with more specific behaviors because our sons have been an incredible challenge. We now feel we are making progress and have a safe direction, instead of all the "I don't knows" we received.
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on 27 March 2001
This book by Dr. Federici was bought by us after the BBC Show as we had our doubts and reservations. After raising a very troubled adopted boy, and having no luck in helping him through our system of experts, we were intriqued by his ideas but cautious at first. After reading this book, our opinion changed completely as his work was truely in the best interest of the child and family. We had more hope and guidance than given by many experts who had seen our son and just did not have a solution to offer. We have begun to explore the interventions in this book (which went well beyond the "holding" that the show broadcasted which turned out to be very misportrayed in the show), and set a strong standard of "adults only' and it has been working. There were some tough moments, but I think our son was asking for this type of structure that NO ONE was willing to offer in his other therapies. We felt helpless and inadequate as parents. We hope others will take a look at this book which cause quite a stir here and see it as a very family-friendly and supportive program for troubled children of all kinds--much more than was portrayed on the show. Actually, we found this book to be more sensible than the multitudes of "experts" we had seen in the various clinics and universities.
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on 5 February 1999
Dr. Federici assumes the parent is ready to do the right thing and uses a firm, direct, and detailed approach in dealing with difficult children who have developed bad behaviors. The approach in this book is fully objective, with no coddling of parent or child. This is a manual for those who are willing to work towards results. It is specific on techniques to use from start to finish on bonding and re-establishing the family. Even in what seems to be the most hopeless situation, Dr. Federici expresses confidence in the reader's ability to achieve success. Success is realistic in his "80% rule" -seeking perfection is not realistic; however, a 80& success rate is. Additionally, this book includes everything one needs to know to feel competent when asking for help- from how to find the right professional, personality disorders, assessments and testing, medications, how to deal with and include siblings, and where to go for support.
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on 25 March 2001
We have two very aggressive and disturbed adopted children that were not able to be helped by any professionals here in the UK. We had reached our limit and it was clear that the children's behavior was worsening even though we sought out all the top "professionals" in the UK. After reading Dr. Federici's book, and implementing a very firm, structured but yet compassionate and helpful treatment plan, we saw MAJOR improvements in six months. We have kept up we his program, and our children are now showing more caring, responsiveness and genuine involvement within the family. It is amazing to see the change. This book was the most common sense and practical approach in dealing with difficult children and never caused any ill-effects-only hope. We are grateful and make this book a "highly recommended" for the family who has run out of options or failed in other treatment. Dr. Federici provides start to finish guidelines.
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on 30 March 2001
This book was bought with some initial hesitation, but turned out to be a welcome addition to our home. We have struggled terribly with 2 of our adopted children and this book was the only thing that made any real practical sense. Dr. Federici seems to really understand the "core issues" which frustrate so many families like ours. I only wish we had extra support from out own psychiatric system to help us carry out his treatment plan, but we suspect our doctors (whom we have seen many), will continue a more passive approach.
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on 12 December 1998
This very aggressive and creative book by Dr. Federici is one of a kind. His experience and willingness to address the 'hopeless child" which many others choose not to discuss has been an inspiration to our family! We hope there is a volume II.
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on 14 May 2014
Help for the hopeless child. Referring to a child like that is totally disrespectful and unprofessional, and in it on a page about holding, as a daily practice, sounding humane. He says that out of control kids push everyone away and they are afraid of emotion that it would lead to abandonment. I would not believe that, its a trick to get parents to do it and to hide the abuse and agony inflicted on the child, that's not help, its hell. Lots of developing children are sensitive to excessive touch which can hurt them.
Take a look at BBC Horizon - Taming the problem child, and you will see Federici and his rediculous nonsence of child cruelty, guised as a treatment program.
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on 1 November 1998
One of the most practical, family friendly books I have read in dealing with children having severe emotional and behavioral problems.
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