There's no shortage of memoirs written by former members of The Regiment, commencing with General Peter De La Billiere's self-serving puff-piece and then followed by the best-seller Bravo Two Zero, which showed that there was a road to making a little coin through writing about one's experiences serving in the Special Air Service. Most of these books have contained some elements of interest but have inevitably presented a rather two-dimensional picture of life as a special forces operator. If you're trying to sell product to an audience largely motivated by an uncritical admiration of those who toss flash-bangs and perform heroic deeds, there's little mileage in presenting a more three-dimensional view in which, inevitably, human failings play a significant role.
Equally, who wants to read about flawed human beings struggling with inner emotions? Far easier to write about H&K MP5s, Nomex suits, and CRW training.
So Robin Horsfall's book comes as something of a major departure from the usual line of books coming from ex-operators. It's apparent early on that the author was always something of a round peg in a square hole, born with significant natural intelligence but in the wrong environment. So his intelligence and sensitivity were liabilities rather than strengths. Many special forces operators come from broken homes and dysfunctional families - indeed, the early development of self-reliance and a keen survival instinct is paramount in such roles and broken homes are often the prime training ground. So far, so predictable. But it takes a special kind of courage to put down on paper for all the world to see one's struggles with insecurity and fear. This is a more thoughtful and reflective look at life in the British Army. It's one that points out the systemic problems with tradition (aka "we've always bullied young recruits, toughens them up, I went through the same thing when I were a lad, no harm in it, etc.") which may make for uncomfortable reading by those whose default attitude is "our soldiers are the best in the world."
Some reviewers have suggested that the author is self-pitying, but this is to miss the point entirely. What Horsfall does is to present an unvarnished view of life inside the British Army and to show how it shaped him for good and for ill. Here's a man who attained the pinnacle of achievement: passing 22 SAS selection and going on to see action around the world and, of course, in the resolution of the Iranian Embassy siege that resulted in the SAS becoming world famous. Instead of writing yet another action-oriented memoir, Horsfall presents life from within. It's easy to play up to the "strong capable SAS" role but much, much harder to express public vulnerability. Yet without such vulnerability there's ultimately no real growth and no improved understanding. And without these things, there's no improvement.
So for readers looking for another McNab-style action read, this book may disappoint. But for the discerning reader wishing to get a much deeper and more interesting picture of life in the most interesting part of the British Army, this book is second to none and a must-read experience.
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Fighting Scared: My life in the SAS (CASSELL MILITARY PAPERBACKS) Paperback – 9 Mar. 2006
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A must
Reviewed in Germany on 14 April 2019Verified Purchase
JAG
Great Read!
Reviewed in Canada on 5 January 2018Verified Purchase
Houston Andrew
Plenty of action as well as personal reflection
Reviewed in the United States on 1 October 2017Verified Purchase
Gregory Shmagin
Good book
Reviewed in the United States on 1 March 2018Verified Purchase
AJ
not wholly implausible
Reviewed in the United States on 25 August 2015Verified Purchase
William Kirk
A first class "fly on the wall" insight to life ...
Reviewed in the United States on 21 July 2017Verified Purchase
C. Yates
Fighting Scared
Reviewed in the United States on 27 August 2015Verified Purchase
Dom. Caprani
Excellent read!
Reviewed in the United States on 24 November 2013Verified Purchase
Paul Twitchett
A good read
Reviewed in the United States on 18 November 2018Verified Purchase
Andy
A very interesting read
Reviewed in the United States on 14 May 2016Verified Purchase
William Kent
good read
Reviewed in the United States on 13 November 2013Verified Purchase