The Father Factor: How Your Father's Legacy Impacts Your Career Paperback – 20 May 2006
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This is further evidence that the phrase "the apple does not fall far from the tree" has truth to it. Although we can't blame our parents forever, being in denial is equally disempowering. By the time we are five years old a good 90% of our personalities are formed based on our observations of mom and dad, our genetic tendencies of temperament, and imprinted memories of childhood already experienced thus far. People are a product of their DNA and upbringing. While our DNA is beyond our control, the negative behavior patterns of our primary caregivers and their impact on us as adults is something we can address. Fathers teach children how to operate in the world of work, handle authority, and problem solve while managing emotions. If we are imprinted by a paternal role model that does not serve our career interests then we have the choice as adults to "overwrite" the program. It doesn't happen overnight but recovering from the effects will happen once the problem is isolated and then addressed properly. One key factor is to not do this alone. Friends are great but this kind of emotional disconnection requires professional assistance. One program that has been known to accomplish this is The Hoffman Process which calls such experiences of parental imprinting and modeling "the Negative Love Syndrome". And the way to disconnect does lie in empathy and forgiveness AFTER healing through the pain of a negative pattern legacy in the first place.
This book will help you overcome the career problems instilled in you from the way your father raised you. The first step is to be aware of the things written in your father factor "rule book". The next step is to figure out a way to change these rules to ones that will help you in your career. If you go on denying that the problems encountered in your career have anything to do with the way your father raised you, then you will run into more problems changing the pattern than you would otherwise. The book points out that denial is a way of allowing your father factor rules to creep up on you and sabotage your career. Most of us try to solve our problems by cutting the "branches and stems" instead of the roots, hence allowing our problems to crop up all over the place. By studying this book and following the author's advice however, you will not likely be blind-sided by those unwritten father factor "rules".