- Paperback: 256 pages
- Publisher: Adams Media (17 Sept. 2008)
- Language: English
- ISBN-10: 1598694715
- ISBN-13: 978-1598694710
- Product Dimensions: 14 x 1.9 x 21.4 cm
- Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars See all reviews (2 customer reviews)
- Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 536,689 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
Confident Parents Remarkable Kids: 8 Principles for Raising Kids You'll Love to Live With Paperback – 17 Sep 2008
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About the Author
Bonnie Harris holds a master's degree in Early Childhood Education with a specialization in parent/child development. She's appeared on TODAY and she's been interviewed on other television and radioshows, and in the New York Times. She's written a feature for Working Mother. She is the mother of two 20-somethings and lives in New Hampshire.
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Top Customer Reviews
I was not disappointed- the book is accessible, concise and organised. It does a great job in helping parents better understand their children's needs and perspective. So often we get caught in our own agenda, needing to get things done quickly and expecting immediate obedience from our kids. Bonnie encourages us to take stoke and look at the situation from their point of view. When we have a good understanding of our children's perspective, we are likely to feel compassion instead of resentment, and can concentrate on problem-solving rather than resort to punishment. Bonnie shows how children are different from each other, and how parents can communicate effectively to find solutions to make life easier for their particular family situation.
The book is very clear in structure - it contains eight principles that are then applied to typical family flashpoints such as morning routine, sibling rivalry and homework. A very good read. I will recommend it to my clients together with my own book, of course!
I found the whole
aspect of the child having a problem rather than being one extremely helpful. Whenever we found ourselves in a battle of wills I remembered this and it made me more sympathetic rather than reactive.
Also the concept of who owns the problem, you or the child, this often applies. When the child is actually behaving just like a child should but it's the adult who feels uncomfortable and punishes the child for his/her own feelings rather than allowing thr child to be a child and being aware enough to take responsibilty for ones own environment and response to it.
I can not recommend this book enough! I still have the tips I wrote on the fridge when my son was 2 and it still applies now he is 5. He is a well mannered extremely responsible and confident little boy and I have never once 'smacked him' or really raised my voice.
Excellent book for parents.
Most Helpful Customer Reviews on Amazon.com (beta)
Adoptive Families Together (AFT) has similar philosophies regarding how we as parents react to our kids' behaviors. They come to us with so much baggage and we must determine what is causing the bad behaviors.
Part 2 is filled with great practical ways to apply the 8 Principles. Chapters 9 to 15 cover all the "hot spots" that occur in everyday life.
Heather T. Forbes, LCSW
Author of Beyond, Consequences, Logic, and ControlBeyond Consequences, Logic, & Control, Volume 2
The most important thing we can do as parents is connect with our children.
You cannot control your child's behavior but you can 100% control your own.
It is not our job to make our kids happy.
The behavior in your child that you focus on the most only grows.
Problem solving techniques are much more effective long term than punishment
Children hate to be punished and most parents hate to punish their children