CHAE STRATHIE was created by a team of dim-witted amateur scientists 36 years ago in Kirkcaldy, Scotland.
He was educated in a secret underwater laboratory, before escaping in a bubble at the age of 18.
He then embarked on a series of ill-fated schemes designed to win friends and impress girls. The most notable of these disastrous outings was his attempt to reach the South Pole in a shopping trolley pulled by a team of kittens. He was later hospitalised for six months when he tried to become the first idiot to land on the moon using a box of cheap fireworks and some string.
Chae is a world famous horse-whisperer, weasel-murmerer and bee-shouter and is the creator of all the most successful Broadway musicals since 1981.
He can also speak seventeen languages . . . at once.
Of course not all of this is true, but what is true is that Chae Strathie is a 36-year-old author of several picture books for young children.
He grew up in the tiny World Heritage village of New Lanark, in the middle of a forest on the banks of a roaring river.
When he left school he moved to Edinburgh to study film and photography at Napier University, but dropped out after a year because he kept chopping people's heads off in photographs (not literally).
Shortly after leaving he landed a job as a reporter with Scottish newspaper institution The Sunday Post - home of Oor Wullie and The Broons.
He covered most roles in reporting, from news to features and even occasional forays into football match reporting. He interviewed such giants as Matthew Corbett (of Sooty and Sweep fame), Gene Simmons from Kiss and the chap who played Jimmy Corkhill on Brookside. Yes, THAT glamorous.
He has also embarrassed himself in front of Sean Connery and Ronnie Corbett.
These days he works as a sub-editor for the same paper.
Chae's first two books, My Dad and The Tickle Tree, were published in 2007 and 2008 respectively. His first Scholastic picture book, The Loon on the Moon, is due out in June.
His greatest claim to fame is featuring in an episode of Channel 4's Location, Location, Location. (They didn't find him a house.) He also worked on a short animation that was shown on Channel 4 in 2008.
He plays guitar and harmonica badly but enthusiastically.
Chae lives in a small coastal village in Fife with his wife Corinna, daughter Eilidh, a one-eyed cat, two two-eyed cats, a goldfish (full compliment of eyes also) and numerous uninvited spiders (eyes: lots).