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Boundaries: When to Say Yes, When to Say No, To Take Control of Your Life: When to Say Yes, How to Say No, to Take Control of Your Life Paperback – 1 Mar 2002

4.2 out of 5 stars 246 customer reviews

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Frequently bought together

  • Boundaries: When to Say Yes, When to Say No, To Take Control of Your Life: When to Say Yes, How to Say No, to Take Control of Your Life
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Product details

  • Paperback: 320 pages
  • Publisher: Zondervan; Rev Ed edition (1 Mar. 2002)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0310247454
  • ISBN-13: 978-0310247456
  • Product Dimensions: 13.9 x 2 x 21.6 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (246 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 3,855 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
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Product description

From the Publisher

Synopsis:
While co-dependency was the buzzword of the 1980s, boundaries may be the word for the 1990s. According to authors and clinical psychologists, Henry Cloud and John Townsend, a boundary is defined as one’s personal property line and delineates those things for which he or she is responsible. The premise of their book, Boundaries, and its accompanying workbook, is that a great number of psychological, spiritual, and relational disorders have boundary conflicts at their core. This Gold Medallion award-winning book seeks to present a biblical treatment of boundaries, identifies how boundaries are developed and how they become disrupted, illustrates misconceptions of their function and purpose, targets boundary conflicts, and gives a program for developing and maintaining healthy limits. Boundaries affect all areas of our lives: · Physical boundaries help us determine who may touch us, how, and when. · Mental boundaries give us freedom to have our own thoughts and opinions. · Emotional boundaries help us deal with our own emotions and disengage us from the harmful, manipulative emotions of others. · Spiritual boundaries help us distinguish God’s will from our own and give us renewed awe for our Creator. The Boundaries Workbook, available separately, provides practical, non-theoretical exercises that will help set healthy boundaries with parents, spouses, children, freidns, co-workers, and even yourself. --This text refers to an alternate Paperback edition.

From the Back Cover

Having clear boundaries is essential to a healthy, balanced lifestyle. A boundary is a personal property line that marks those things for which we are responsible. In other words, boundaries define who we are and who we are not. Boundaries impact all areas of our lives: Physical boundaries help us determine who may touch us and under what circumstances -- Mental boundaries give us the freedom to have our own thoughts and opinions -- Emotional boundaries help us to deal with our own emotions and disengage from the harmful, manipulative emotions of others -- Spiritual boundaries help us to distinguish God's will from our own and give us renewed awe for our Creator -- Often, Christians focus so much on being loving and unselfish that they forget their own limits and limitations. When confronted with their lack of boundaries, they ask: - Can I set limits and still be a loving person? - What are legitimate boundaries? - What if someone is upset or hurt by my boundaries? - How do I answer someone who wants my time, love, energy, or money? - Aren't boundaries selfish? - Why do I feel guilty or afraid when I consider setting boundaries? Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend offer biblically-based answers to these and other tough questions, showing us how to set healthy boundaries with our parents, spouses, children, friends, co-workers, and even ourselves.

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Customer Reviews

Top Customer Reviews

Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
Excellent book - would usually read at bed time but the content is very heavy / intense so I would recommend to put some time aside in the evening to read it
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Wish I had used this years ago
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Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
I am afraid I couldn't get past the persistent religious tone of the book in the way others managed to do. It seemed pervasive to me and was very distracting. Even examples of situations often included overt religious overtones. Although I am not religious I am not anti Christianity and it has to be fairly full on to interfere with my ability to appreciate the content.

A shame that it wasn't toned down.
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Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
i thought it would be better and aimed towards people with bpd that need to learn boundaries, i guess i was wrong my fault
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Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
Overwhelming quotations from Bible, many more than I expected and wanted to see in a seemingly psychology book. Could be good for people who are looking for a Christian advise on boundary problems. I don't recommend it to people who would rather keep science and religion separate.
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Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
not a great book. It is full of frequent bible quotes which is not for me.
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Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
Empowering book. Wish I'd read it years ago! Good, solid sense that cuts through the destructive myths we absorb. Very occasionally we come across a book that we know, if we put into practice its core principles, will change our lives for the better. This is one of those.
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Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
Presents itself as a psychology book but is actually an extremely long fundamentalist evangelical Christian sermon!
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