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The Book You Wish Your Parents Had Read (and Your Children Will Be Glad That You Did): THE #1 SUNDAY TIMES BESTSELLER Hardcover – 7 Mar 2019
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A beautifully comprehensive look at what it might mean to be a sane and emotionally intelligent parent; hugely warm, wise, hopeful and encouraging that, with a little self-reflection and insight, we could all learn to spare the next generation a few of our own troubles (Alain de Botton)
This is a kind and forgiving book that advocates kind and forgiving behaviour, to ourselves and our partners (Cathy Rentzenbrink, The Times)
This book is guidance on how to bond with your children based on understanding how your own upbringing affects your parenting (Lorraine Candy, Sunday Times)
Philippa Perry is the wisest coolest person (Emma Gannon)
I'm not a parent. But I fucking LOVE Philippa Perry and think she's wise and brilliant so this will be amazing (Bella Mackie)
Not got kids? It doesn't matter, as the wonderful psychotherapist Philippa Perry's latest book is actually about using our pasts to understand ourselves (...) it's also an excellent book for reminding yourself: life is hard and you're doing your best - so try not to beat yourself up for everyday mistakes (Stylist)
EVERY parent should read this book, however old their child. In fact, any adult in a relationship should read it too. Distilled in less than 250 pages is a road map to healthy relationships. Required reading (Express)
If you're determinedly not a self-help kind of reader (like me), make an exception for [this book]. And if you're not a parent, don't dismiss it. The message is one of non-judgemental kindness. The sophisticated psychoanalytical version of my "count to ten and then say something kind" advice to my kids (and myself) when things start to fall apart (Vogue)
About the Author
PHILIPPA PERRY has been a psychotherapist for the past twenty years. She is also an agony aunt for Red Magazine, a freelance writer, and a TV and radio presenter and has worked on several documentaries including: The Truth about Children Who Lie; The Age of Emotion; and Humiliation for BBC Radio 4; Being Bipolar for Channel 4, Sex, Lies and Love Bites, a History of Agony Aunts and How to be a Surrealist with Philippa Perry for BBC4. She has also written two other books: Couch Fiction, a Graphic Tale of Psychotherapy and How to Stay Sane. She lives in London with her husband the artist Grayson Perry, and they have a grown-up daughter, Flo.
From the Publisher
About the Author
Philippa Perry has been a psychotherapist for the past twenty years. A faculty member of The School of Life, she is also an agony aunt for Red Magazine and has presented several documentaries, including The Truth about Children Who Lie for BBC Radio 4 and Being Bipolar for Channel 4.
Most recently, Philippa featured in the highly popular dating show, Celebs Go Dating, where she used her expertise to give the celebrities some much-needed love advice.
You can follow Philippa on Twitter, @Philippa_Perry
This book will help you to:
- Understand how your own upbringing may affect your parenting
- Contain, express, accept and validate your own and your child’s feelings
- Understand that all behaviour is communication
- Break negative cycles and patterns
- Accept that you will make mistakes and learn what you can do about them
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Perry lays out her methods and thoughts very gently, with lots of good examples from real life, little case studies; but it’s the insights which really help. Looking at WHY we lose our rag about certain trigger bits of parenting - going back to our own childhoods and looking at why - OH MY GOD. Brilliant.
There’s also so much help here about FIXING those situations once you as the parent have cocked up. Rupture / repair, as she puts it.
And also advice on how to manage your parental situations better. When your kid says look at this, LOOK AT IT. I know that sounds sort of obvious but often I will say “hang on a sec I’m making dinner” etc. I feel like from now on I will do that differently because it doesn’t take two seconds to run and look. And the response you get is ♥️
I found it readable, funny, thoughtful, insightful, but most of all INCREDIBLY useful and, very very very rare for a book, genuinely life-changing.