can you see it - Cowell and the other two idiots watching perplexed as Tom Waits barks at them through a megaphone while weird Partch percussion discordant and spooky drives along behind him.....

Cheryl Cole, Danni Minogue, could they cut the mustard? I think not. The rank hypocrisy of them judging others irritates.

Ozzie would be good for a laugh, either as a contestant or as a judge.

I think Cradle Of Filth would be good for a laugh

Ozzy Osbourne would start being polite but would end up swearing at them, it would be hilarious. What about Kylie Minogue? Would be fun to see if her sister made derogatory comments about her singing. I like the way all the judges stand up and applause when they have a star on the show - even when they are awful (like Robbie Williams was).

In fairness Cheryl Cole did get through the same (or similar) process with Pop Stars - The Rivals to get into that little vocal harmony ensemble she used to sing with. not that I'd especially like to see it again! How about Dylan, or Jim Morrison perhaps? In fact most of my CD collection wouldn't get through the first auditions. But which, if any, established artist could possibly get through to have a chance of winning? who could do the Abba week, Diva week, Song from the Movies, Big Band and Rock week, and still maintain some degree of credibility? The system is designed, lets face it to destroy and exclude anybody with a degree of belief in their own individuality. The audience thought Will Young stood up to Cowell and would be "his own man", but what has he done since winning? Tedious middle-of-the road tosh! Love to see John Lee Hooker do Robbie Williams week!

I'd like to see Elizabeth Fraser go on the show, she probably wouldn't go through as the judges probably couldn't see her doing a commercial song. More fool them!

Why put anyone of musical caliber through such utter stupidity as that abortion of this so called entertainment, the stupidity of this show is brain deadening, i watched its first show some years ago and avoid it like the plague carrier it is...

I would like to see the Ebola virus go through the X Factor process.
That should fvcking guarantee it won't taint any tv screens ever again.

Now now - such vitriol and spite. We should all be grateful for the fine job Mr Cowell is doing bringing fresh and challenging new talent to the small screen. I would not be surprised if surprise hit twins find a way to the Xmas number one spot. Yes its popular so there its great - just cause most of you posters are too busy listening to Nurse with Wound or Slipknot to appreciate the skill of a finely crafted pop tune..etc etc..
What about Beefheart ? or or making Mr Cowell sing and if he's sh*t - shot him. (interesting that a kill word gets past the censor while a bodily function word does not)

Pretty much any metal vocalist - ie those who tend to scream, bellow, growl or screech rather than sing. These pointless shows are obviously so biased towards the percieved mainstream (ie rotten wailing RnB, or whatever 'adult contemporary' is) that the very instance of being confronted with someone like Max Cavalera or any comedy death-metal grunters would be enough to melt the face right off of Minogue II, and entirely dissolve the tiny mind of Cheryl Shovelling Cole.

I'm a big fan of Tricky, they should get him on. He basically a producer who can't sing, or rap - I could definitely see him up their frying Cowell's cash-obsessed brain with his own special brand of sinister, mad-person-in-the-street mumbling.

Or in a similar vein, what about Mark E. Smith doing his almost award-winning drunken philosophical binman impersonation? Or worse, Shane MaGowan's almost award-winning drunken philosophical binman impersonation??

Or worser still, Shaun Ryder doing his... all right, you get the idea. They're all total lookers with killer voices, and would certainly do the business with the blue-rinse brigade and they've obviously got the camp novely factor!

Get the four of them together as a boy band! 'The Mumblers: The Christmas album!' I can already hear Cowell's cash-horn honking inside his corrupt, worthless, bear-furred head.

Or Sinead O'Connor could go on and just tear up a photo of Louis Walsh. Now that would be funny.

The possibilities are endless. Let's see if they're isn't still time to get a rat-pack re-styled Cannibal Corpse for the Christmas number one, with a swing version of 'Hammer-Smashed Face!' From their new album, 'Swinging the Hammer!'

Ringo Starr could appal them with his voice, refuse to sign autographs, sing some more and tell them he's doing it all through Peace and Love.

Keith Flint could scare the bejazuz out of them so that they wouldn't be able to put him down!
... Or how about the leader of Lordi???

would love to have seen Tom Waits, Dylan, Van Morrison, Frank Zappa, Roger Chapman, Christy Moore (can't u just hear him singing a diva song, big band hit, rock n roll or motown style, with dance routine !)
i can just hear danni or cheryl's helpful technical appraisal eg "i think you're out of your comfort zone there but we all love you cos you're oirish"

The late GG Allin would've raised a few eyebrows...........

Basically anybody who doesn't look like Alesha Dixon and sound like Mariah Carey, as that's all they seem to be interested in.

Someone like Neil Young would be good for a laugh, though. How would they cope with that!

Looks like Alesha Dixon you say. Suits me sir. Come on people, when has music ever mattered? Good looks are all that count. Respect to Dannii and Chezza.

Very clever KO73.

You seem to have unearthed a number of posters who's knowledge of the format and content of the 'show' is actually rather scary !

Put Edgar Broughton up on the stage and let the demons loose. One heart attack, two faints and a walk out later and no more judges - ergo end of the road for the show ! - if only.

Problem is - would they commission peter kays' whatever it was on ice etc. as a replacement ?

Rod Stewart...he'd get booed off

Weird Al.....anyday.

Leonard Cohen would get booed off the stage, Robbie Williams would be treated the same way the twins are and what would they do to Grace Jones...

As judges, Ginger Baker and Jack Bruce. Imagine the moods, the strops, the anger! Add Courtney Love, Ritchie Blackmore, and Paul Rodgers. Who would storm out first? As for the performers, just select the ones with no talent but loads of ego, etc.

Seriously, though, these shows are just terrible. In 10 years, ALL pop hits will originate from such 'talent' progs. We'll all be as moody as Baker and co. then...

Or as bad as the Moody Blues? Perish the thought.

"Cheryl Cole, Danni Minogue, could they cut the mustard?"
Cheryl Cole. Came out of Popstars the rivals. Could she cut the mustard? yes.

SpiderBoris - in my view you have made the best suggestions.

Robert Fripp?

Oooh! I can imagine the shock they'd have if Toyah ran in... Then the hilarity of her lisping and throwing a hissy fit if they take the mick. How about Toyah accompanied by her hubby? Robert would be wonderfully polite, trying to calm his missus down and appease the judges at the same time. Some job!