111 of 126 people found the following review helpful
WILL SOMEONE CHANGE MY PANTS,
This review is from: The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim (Xbox 360) (Video Game)
So I put the disc in and go through 30minutes of making my warrior, who turns out every-time like a camp Gerard Butler. So eventually Gerard and me skip off into the Skyrim world looking for wild adventure,really can this catch my interest....Whats this Gerard a butterfly,catch the butterfly,Oooooh a Bear run Gerard run.Yes fair Maiden I will find your lost love.Frodo you have my sword.Make a Dagger,enchant a dagger,sell a dagger.Run through the grass giggling like a school girl.Is that a Mammoth,yup its a Mammoth.What do you mean your a Vampire.We have to go through the mines of Moria.Dragon,Dragon..your going to need a bigger Sword.Horse is wounded,must save Mr Horsey....whats the time 0300am are you insane it was 2pm a minute ago.......I cant switch it off,you dont understand Darling I am the Dragon Born......any chance you can give me a shave and change my pants!!!!
Well you are now looking at a level 50 Skyrimmer,Gerard has done me proud....Darling Darling I am level 50,truly,I am born of Dragon.
"That must have been one big Dragon,now come to bed you fat....."
Oooohhhh the add on Dawnguard has entered my Kindom of the Rim.I decided to play it cool, just do my usual gentle evening tussle with a Giant and de-toe him as the Sun melted in the valley.Then swim back to Whiterun, whilst picking dragonfly out of the
balmy air, to sell to Belathor my favourite trader.....whose got no head...no head!!!...Belly oh sweet Belly.Who the hell are you....Master Vampire with Red eyed Hound.....Darling I cant turn it off, Bellys got no head,I must avenge Belly's head......I know we have an appointment with the guidance counselor in the morning but my virtual chums been decapitated.
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Showing 1-10 of 16 posts in this discussion
Initial post: 13 Dec 2011 20:06:54 GMT
Mark Hudson says:
Bloody hilarious review but at the same time oh so true.
Tip for ya, turn em inside out and you're good to go for another few days....
Posted on 22 Dec 2011 10:37:32 GMT
John A. Lloyd says:
ya know what...... Your a funny guy!
Posted on 10 Jan 2012 23:34:56 GMT
Xxxxxxcellent review....did ya save yer horsey?! Lol
In reply to an earlier post on 11 Jan 2012 21:58:37 GMT
G. G. Macdonald says:
You will be glad to know Horsey is alive and well but after the Goblin incident all thoughts of adventure have eluded him. Now sipping warm brandy he sits by a small Riften art studio listening to smooth Ocarina Jazz whilst blowing Havana smoke rings past glow worms as I walk everywhere. That Dragon Armour really is quite chaffing after a while.........I will pass on your concern.
In reply to an earlier post on 19 Jan 2012 16:00:43 GMT
Amazon Customer says:
Superb review. You've made me want a wife (I already have Skyrim) so that someone will change my pants... And you say dragon armour chafes, try jeans when you haven't moved for 5 weeks.
In reply to an earlier post on 21 Jan 2012 12:32:26 GMT
G. G. Macdonald says:
You are indeed at loss my fellow Rimmer, a Wifey is truly magical, even as I am Sky-rimming she patiently works on her studies on Google with input like " Would an X-Box weigh down a Slob in a fast-flowing river "......ahhh amore !
Posted on 21 Feb 2012 16:17:33 GMT
best review ever
Posted on 27 Feb 2012 16:38:36 GMT
Matt Wells says:
Top Review. It's all true
Posted on 23 Jun 2012 18:08:42 BDT
J Riley says:
Great review, a true comedian.
Posted on 3 Sep 2012 09:16:09 BDT
What a wonderful entertaining review, probably the best of all that I've read. I have a bad enough time getting my 11 year old to leave Minecraft on his XBox, so I'm pretty glad that this game is outside his age limit otherwise-goodbye real world! With thanks to Mr. Macdonald for brightening up my day!