61 of 73 people found the following review helpful
Not Very Slothful Behaviour.,
This review is from: The Lost Future [DVD]  (DVD)
I like to think that I am pretty broad minded, and don't mind having my credulity stretched to breaking point, so long as the film entertains. I loved that recent sci fi film "Outlander" about a man from outer space landing amongst Vikings and fighting a pretty nasty looking varmit. Total nonsense, but great fun. This film certainly stretches credulity, but doesn't quite manage to entertain in the same way. You can just imagine the movie makers sat round the table on this one. One says "Lets do a cave man story". Another one says "Na, they did that with Raquel Welch a few years back". Another guy says "I know, why not set it in a post apocalyptic future". Much muttering takes place. Someone else says "Why don't we throw in a few monsters like giant sloths and Mammoths". The guy in charge of finances says "Well we can afford one sloth". Another guy says "Why don't we throw in some mutants like those ones in Lord of the Rings". Much excitement around the table! Another adds "Why not have some miraculous yellow powder that is the only cure for the mutant disease". The studio boss, turning to his finance man says "I love it". Money man says "Well if we can film it in South Africa where it should be nice and cheap I think its a goer". And so "The Lost Future" made for TV film was born. Well it either happened like that, or somebody was sniffing something they shouldn't have been.
The makers somehow persuaded Sean Bean to play a major role. Perhaps a trip to Cape Town tickled his fancy, or he had just had a bad day at the races. We follow a group of sartorially challenged cave men under attack from some very odd mutants whose movements would certainly attract the attention of the girls at the local disco. They can bounce to incredible heights and run like a cheetah on all fours. A bit disconcerting really. After a while we realise that it is, surprise surprise, set in the future! Oh, that is after a battle with a giant sloth, that had been genetically engineered in the past. I thought sloths were peace loving animals that hung about in trees gathering moss? Not this one though. We then move on...... Oh I really can't be bothered! Anyway throw in a few other humans who look like they have escaped from "Blade Runner", one of whom has a nice eco friendly dress made out of plastic bottles. Then there is a sort of poor mans "Lord of the Rings" battle at the end, and hey presto you have a movie.
Perhaps the funniest bit was watching Sean Bean in the extras explaining just what this film was about. He managed to do it with a straight face, but he was not overly convincing. I was going to say "But it's not all bad". Well actually it was. For a made for TV film they seem to have chucked quite a lot of money at it, that has duly been flushed down the loo in that time honoured Hollywood tradition of "shooting the money". This is the sort of movie that would have had that Hollywood icon of the bad movie Ed Wood, drooling with happiness. He would no doubt have had a tear in his eye. You too might have a tear in your eye by the end of this film, if you stick it that far? I have already received my insanity sticker for doing so! Who knows you may even like it? It is certainly different I will give it that.
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Showing 1-6 of 6 posts in this discussion
Initial post: 10 Apr 2011 19:08:08 BDT
Tell Sean Bean to his face, that you thought this movie was rubbish!
In reply to an earlier post on 11 Apr 2011 11:01:52 BDT
Bob Salter says:
He probably doesn't need telling!
In reply to an earlier post on 11 Apr 2011 12:30:43 BDT
Ha Ha! He should focus on playing a Sheffield Welder!
Posted on 20 Apr 2011 08:33:52 BDT
Last edited by the author on 20 Apr 2011 08:34:28 BDT
Je Salter says:
I bought this primarily because Sean Bean was in it and he can usually be relied upon to star in good films, that and the story of a post apocalyptic earth, should have made for good viewing. I put it on last night however, and had to turn it off after 35 minutes because it was so bad. I tried again this morning before work and it was marginally better, I will watch the rest later (if I can bear it) and do a review.
First thoughts aren't good however, lot's of wooden acting, bad script, cheesy storyline (in how it's done) and a general tackiness that's just quite dreadful. I'm with my namesake above (who I don't know), I'm just surprised he gave it two stars!
In reply to an earlier post on 20 Apr 2011 22:08:23 BDT
Bob Salter says:
Well namesake, I guess I am just a generous old softee!
In reply to an earlier post on 11 May 2011 22:26:33 BDT
Regarding the belief that it was a free trip to Cape Town that swayed Mr Bean, this is entirely possible. He starred as the Baddie in the recent Death Race 2 Straight-to-DVD movie. That was filmed in Cape Town too. Perhaps he just let his beard grow a bit and then just wandered onto the set of this!
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