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1 of 2 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars Some good ideas on communication...but..., 27 Aug 2008
This review is from: Mars and Venus on a Date: A Guide for Navigating the 5 Stages of Dating to Create a Loving and Lasting Relationship (Mass Market Paperback)
John Gray's book emphasizes open communication in his book between men and women This is clearly important.

But, the open communication isn't so open at times. Gray doesn't encourage being candid at times. This is a slippery slope. For example, Gray says that if a man is late because of an accident on a bridge, he should apologize without explaining the reason for being late, and the woman should be nonjudgmental. Is this communication relationship enhancing?

Also, he frequently over emphasizes the differerences in men and women without acknowledging their similarities enough. For example, Gray's simplistic view of men as the wrongdoers in relationships and women as the saviors weakens the material. He explains in detail how men should learn to apologize and women should learn to forgive, but not vice versa. We all make mistakes in relationships and both parties need to learn the importance of sincere apology and forgiveness.

Good communication is clearly important in any relationship and I applaud John Gray's attempt to get couples to communicate, but emphasizing non candid behaviors dilutes the main message of the book.

Also, stereotyping the sexes can lead to polarization and a breakdown in communication. Understanding gender differences is important, but equally important is the acceptance and celebration of our similarities.

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Showing 1-1 of 1 posts in this discussion
Initial post: 5 May 2012 02:03:52 BDT
tulisa says:
C Clayton's review of Mars and Venus on a Date, was too negative,and didn't seem to notice all the positive feedback the book's review has got ,and Clayton makes it obvious that it's to take the focus away from John Gray's book, and onto Clayton's books, by picking so many holes in a very practical,extremely helpful & insightful book, Clayton does not realize it makes him/her come off looking rather small minded, as the aim of the review was to find only faults. Pat. England
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