Customer Review

29 of 32 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars The Spinal Tap of Fantasy, 10 Dec 2007
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This review is from: Hawk The Slayer [1980] [DVD] (DVD)
Had the "Carry On" gang ever made a serious stab at a swords and sorcery movie, it may well have taken this form. And indeed, Bernard Bresslaw himself puts in a particularly sterling performance as the scary giant (complete with obligatory, unfeasibly massive club...). I defy anyone not to enjoy this movie. Wobbly sets (including a monastery with an interesting 'skull' interior decor motif), wobbly acting (performed by many 'before they were famous' British thesps who almost manage to out-ham an incandescent Jack Palance) and, spendidly, an incredibly wobbly script, which never opts for simple cliche when the opportunity to employ a mind numbing, painfully formulaic approach presents itself.

I love this film.

Were it a woman I would ask it to marry me and bear my child...although the union would no doubt produce a hideously deformed progeny that utterly failed to justify the intense labour involved in its birth: oh, the irony.

Look out for jumping fog (as a result of attempts in the editing room to make things magically 'disappear'), hilarious arrow-antics all round (the 'who cares about the laws of physics' hats-off moment being particularly splendid in slow motion), a giant who generally appears in the foreground to create the impression that the dwarf is smaller than is actually the case and, crucially, a steady supply of grimacing baddies sitting round in forests (which seem to cover Hawk's entire world and contain any number of snakes, skeletons, and dry-ice machines) ready to pick a fight at the drop of a hat, thereby enabling key characters to strut their heroic stuff. The soundtrack alone is worth the price of this video (can Jeff Wayne sue...?), especially the hilarious 'good/bad/ugly' Hawk signature twiddle. Unfortunately, the ensuing laughter often drowns out the subsequent dialogue. You should therefore take care not to miss such classic lines as "How they laughed..." and "The hunchback will have something to say about this..."

One thousand words are insufficient to describe this movie. Once seen, your life will never be the same again. In fact, drop me a line and together we can push for a national re-release....

Enjoy

Brother Mugga (with assistance from Dr. Chris 'Wuss' Emmett)

Ps: Nice to see a 'Hawk' reference in an episode of "Spaced". That's the spirit.
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Showing 1-2 of 2 posts in this discussion
Initial post: 19 May 2008 14:11:50 BDT
One of the funniest most enjoyable reviews I've ever read and yes, I agree about the Spaced quote!

In reply to an earlier post on 17 May 2011 10:47:36 BDT
M. Brunton says:
That was one of the best reviews I've seen on Amazon. I'm not getting annoyed looks from other people for giggling out loud and "the hunchback will have something to say about this."
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