14 of 18 people found the following review helpful
Stop! I'm getting off,
This review is from: Train [DVD] (DVD)
A group of young amateur wrestlers and their coach board a train, only to find that a strange doctor is using the back carriage as a slice and dice room.
That's about it for the plot...
I couldn't take this film seriously, the acting is superficial at best with Birch looking almost bored as scream queen, there is very little emotion to her. And the bad guys look and feel fresh from an adult pantomime they are so over the top.
It's generic script steals directly from films like 'Hostel' in order to keep the juice running.
If you just HAVE to see people being hung with hooks, having eyes pulled out, legs sawn off and spines chipped by hammer and nail, I'd recommend 'Wolf Creek' , 'Frontiers' or 'Midnight Meat Train'. If you really want to see a stale imitation, dreadfully managed and utterly pointless I would recommend this.
I'm hoping that this brand of drama (if you can call it horror) is running the end of it's course. It's for gore hounds only, not scary, not intense (because the character development is so bad you just don't care about what happens to them). Poor script and all leading up to a predictably poor ending.
This was a wasted opportunity for something that could have been okay, if only I couldn't imagine the director pleasuring himself whilst filming, in order to prove himself in the ranks of Eli Roth.
This film is only for people who get off on watching torture porn, fancy Thora Birch or like trains.