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19 of 21 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars And this is my boom stick!
Everything you expected and less, I thought they stopped making films of this quality with Red Sonja and Beastmaster2, but no. In a more heroic age, this would have gone straight to video but with the advent of movies on demand I watched it on cable, saving myself a trip to Blockbuster - good thing really, as it's now a Starbucks, but I digress.

Some orcs pop...
Published 10 months ago by John R. Wade

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20 of 22 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars THIS IS PRIVATE PROPERTY
John Norton (Rusty Joiner) is not named John Carter because that would be too obvious. He buys an isolated farm and is an ex-soldier. The farm is located near a cave that is a portal to "The Nine Worlds." He has reluctantly obtained the position of "The Sentinel" a guardian of the portal between worlds. He is aided by a blind Native American.

He is also...
Published 17 months ago by The Movie Guy


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20 of 22 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars THIS IS PRIVATE PROPERTY, 4 Jan. 2014
By 
The Movie Guy "Movies from A to Z" (United States) - See all my reviews
(TOP 100 REVIEWER)   
This review is from: Orc Wars (DVD) (DVD)
John Norton (Rusty Joiner) is not named John Carter because that would be too obvious. He buys an isolated farm and is an ex-soldier. The farm is located near a cave that is a portal to "The Nine Worlds." He has reluctantly obtained the position of "The Sentinel" a guardian of the portal between worlds. He is aided by a blind Native American.

He is also tasked in saving the Elf Princess (Masiela Lusha) from an acting career and the hordes of Orcs who desire to capture her for sacrifice, a sacrifice that would open the portals and allow the Orcs to conquer other worlds with their bows and swords. Seriously. Oh yes they also have one Nazgul.

The Orcs looked and grunted convincingly. The fire was all CG, apparently fire insurance is hard to come by. The storyline, as you can tell, wasn't great and at one point I had wished they had copied "John Carter" more, however the lack of a budget prevent exotic scenery . The production starts out as if it was going to be a decent film. But then suddenly everything takes place down on the farm. The idea of getting real help to combat an army of Orcs seems alien to John Norton, who would rather fight them alone save for the occasional person who drops by.

This film is in no way connected to LOTR except for the fact it borrows species from it.

A desperation rental.

Parental Guide: No f-bombs, sex, or nudity. Filmed in Salt Lake City.
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19 of 21 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars And this is my boom stick!, 4 July 2014
By 
John R. Wade "john24526" - See all my reviews
(VINE VOICE)    (REAL NAME)   
This review is from: Orc Wars [DVD] (DVD)
Everything you expected and less, I thought they stopped making films of this quality with Red Sonja and Beastmaster2, but no. In a more heroic age, this would have gone straight to video but with the advent of movies on demand I watched it on cable, saving myself a trip to Blockbuster - good thing really, as it's now a Starbucks, but I digress.

Some orcs pop out of a hole in the ground chasing an elven princess, and some guy who lives in a cabin in the middle of nowhere shoots them. That's the plot. A special effects budget which wouldn't stretch to a set of tyres, never more than ten orcs on screen at once as that's all there are and, well, watch it and see.

Have some beer first though.
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6 of 7 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Its hard to justify the 1h30M or so Iwatch it on Amazon Instant, 7 Dec. 2014
By 
Roger (London, UK) - See all my reviews
This review is from: Orc Wars (Amazon Instant Video)
Never pay money for this film. Its hard to justify the 1h30M or so I watch it on Amazon Instant, but the idea that someone should pay real money to rent or own this is a joke.
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5 of 6 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Lord of the Rings meets Rambo in the cheapest set money can't buy, 28 Jan. 2015
This review is from: Orc Wars (Amazon Instant Video)
Ever wished Lord of the Rings had a guy with a taser? if the answer is yes then this is for you.
If the answers no, then you suck and don't deserve to watch a film anyway. Go listen to the radio as punishment for your lack of creativity.
Don't expect good cgi or highly choreographed fight sequences, but if you like films by guys who are just managing to turn the camera on. This is for you.
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6 of 7 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars ... sure my two Grand sons could have done a better job of makeup and, 17 July 2014
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This review is from: Orc Wars [DVD] (DVD)
the film was complete rubbish i am sure my two Grand sons could have done a better job of makeup and acting
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2.0 out of 5 stars Please Please don't pay any money to watch this!!, 31 Mar. 2015
This review is from: Orc Wars [DVD] (DVD)
That said if you can watch it for free (Freeview on Horror or Amazon Instant etc) then you to can watch with amazement as 6 Orcs get killed and killed again by the same ex-soldier. No really that is the plot - ex-soldier buys a farm finds out that there is a magic portal between this an another world - unfortunately for the bad mad lady in the white sheet (aka the evil enchanters) only 6 Orcs can invade a t a time - this means that we get wave after very small wave to get mown down by our hero. To be fair the 6 Orcs you get have got pretty good (recycled LOTR kit?) costumes and our ex-soldier has a lot of guns but a 1D plot and script with acting from 1st grade means that this never really gets going.

PS For a final giggle note the point when the lead stays "I'll be back..." with no sense of irony or tongue in cheek!!
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3.0 out of 5 stars Good Fun, 16 May 2015
This review is from: Orc Wars (DVD) (DVD)
If taken in the correct spirit this film is really not as bad as some reviewers would have you believe. In short the plot is very simple, an ex soldier finds himself as protector to a magical princess and along the way he must kill hoards of orcs who wish to sacrifice her for magical purpose. The story is light but no really shallow and some of the fight scenes are really quite good. Throw in a dragon, tank, battling gun, numerous arrows, an evil with and a good soundtrack and you have a movie that never takes itself seriously, I niece that if the viewer tries not to over criticise then this film is great fun. I liked it. Not a Hollywood A movie but a darn good B movie by today's standards.
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2.0 out of 5 stars So bad it’s... just bad, 16 April 2015
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This review is from: Orc Wars (Amazon Instant Video)
This really isn’t very good.
I am trying to think of a few good points. A couple of the Orc costumes are good. They do seem to be from Lord of the Rings but unfortunately they might have run out of them as the rest of the Orcs look a bit sketchy which they have covered up by having them wear odd looking helmets.
The acting is okay and the plot is just about logical and consistent. It is filmed competently. The special effects of the Big Bad are decent in a cut price ring wraith sort of way.

Sadly the film is rather dull. The low budget really does show and I think it would have benefitted from being a lot more over the top.
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4.0 out of 5 stars A valiant effort!, 23 May 2015
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This review is from: Orc Wars (Amazon Instant Video)
Fun! A blonde princess, a veteran with a gun collection and evil Orcs... What more do you need? It's not a big budget movie but it certainly tried it's best. If people are not encouraged make films like this then were are a new generation of directors to learn their trade.....
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Four Stars, 9 Feb. 2015
By 
S. Goldie - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
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This review is from: Orc Wars [DVD] (DVD)
very good if you are into these films
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Orc Wars [DVD]
Orc Wars [DVD] by Kohl Glass (DVD - 2014)
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