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on 17 September 2015
THE REAL HOUSES OF PARLIAMENT...
ON QUEER SQUARE

In the Houses of Parliament,
there are some queer folk,
all they do is nod their heads,
and talk a very good talk!
The Houses of Parliament
is corrupt - they seem to like
their work,
But every time it shows them
on TV - all they do is shirk!

They're tapping on their
tablets as though they are all
bored,
They turn up in their suits -
and even get full board!
They claim their expenses,
like any other person,
But not like me and you -
they don't have any good
reason!

The Houses of Parliament,
is know for its diversity,
Every one in there - has ben
to university!
They employ all their relatives -
and keep it in the family,
They pay them cash in the
hand - dodging the tax man
superbly!

The Houses of Parliament -
as a history of such slender,
You can yourself join this
club - but one has to be a
bender!
This house is based in
London Town - were there's
hardly any cockneys,
But there is a club so
exclusive - and it attracts
lots of willies!!!!

The Houses of shame - is
were the MPs all gather,
Fiddling more of their cash -
they're all in it together!!!!
Lord Gay, meet Lord Bender,
whatever has gone wrong?
Everyone has got a title -
watch out for a song!!!!

The Houses of Parliament,
is the home on Queer Square,
Where all the MPs congregate -
lurking in their lair!!
So may I welcome - a special
guest so new,
His name is Sir Guy Fawkes -
he's returned just for you!

He will now clean up this
place - and then he'll be a
knight.
He's set to blow the lot up -
to the cheering crowd's
delight.
The Houses of the Parliament,
is finally laid to rest,
Goodbye to the Parliament on
Queer Square, now we feel
such zest!!!!

A new day has now dawned
as all the UK is free.
Freedom from these parasites,
is happiness to you and me.
The Houses are no more - as
history is now made,
But why do all gay MPs - like
their carpet laid!!!!

BY
DARRYL ASHTON
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on 30 August 2013
I love Simon Hoggart's writing but have been rib tickled beyond delight by this collection of his accounts of parliament. I will never look at a 'My Little Pony' in the same way again. Splendid!
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on 27 June 2013
I just couldn't stop laughing out loud all throughout this book even though I had already read most of the articles. Absolutely worth every penny to cheer up a grey day.
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on 21 August 2013
Witty, amusing and properly disrespectful to politicians. Decent bedtime reading, if you don't mind being beset by the odd chuckle or two.
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on 12 March 2014
So funny. Such a shame that Simon is no longer with us. I will miss his columns in the Guardian.
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on 18 August 2014
Sadly Simon Hoggart died recently so there'll be no more of his humour to entertain us anymore. So here's a chance to own a selection of some of his best pieces just to remind you how good he was.
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on 3 September 2013
Simon Hoggart manages so make serious points about our attempts at democratic government while, at the same time poking fun at its weak points-politicians
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on 11 November 2014
I enjoyed reading this book which is a compilation of the author's daily political sketches over the last two decades or so. He provides a very amusing insight into the antics of the people we have voted to represent us in Parliament; some of his comments made me wonder how some MPs managed to be elected and continued to be an MP. I would recommend this book to anyone interested in the proceedings in both houses of Parliament but with the proviso that the comments are written in a very humorous way.
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on 16 April 2014
This type of book is a new genre for me and was recommendation. I thoroughly enjoyed the writing style and format and the period mr Hoggart covers has a particular appeal as it covers what for me is my era (I first voted in 1997). What a particularly enjoyed was humorous take on the MP's behaviour and quirks e.g the fascination of "Micky Fab" etc.
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on 6 July 2013
I've been reading Mr. Hoggart for donkeys' years in the Guardian, so it was good to be able to read a retrospective. Surprisingly, I could remember the historical context for most of it, bot Mr. H provides succinct intros to each piece. His wit has not diminished, rather, it has matured over the years. Strongly recommended.
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