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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Bad Game but tonnes of fun with friends
Amazingly bad game but great for having a laugh with fiends. Bought it as a joke Christmas present and it was the best present this year. Loved how broken and little effort was put into QA and sound acting.
Published 3 months ago by Abyss03

versus
7 of 7 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars A game that makes Aliens: Colonial Marines look good!
For a start, this game doesn't even deserve to wear the moniker of "game". A game is something that is fun and enjoyable for the player. This is about as far from fun as it is possible to get.

Shonky controls, terrible gameplay, poor graphics and an overly long main story all combine to make this game all but unplayable. Don't believe me? Read on...
Published 19 months ago by Catmandu


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7 of 7 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars A game that makes Aliens: Colonial Marines look good!, 16 Sept. 2013
= Fun:1.0 out of 5 stars 
This review is from: Ride to Hell: Retribution(Xbox 360) (Video Game)
For a start, this game doesn't even deserve to wear the moniker of "game". A game is something that is fun and enjoyable for the player. This is about as far from fun as it is possible to get.

Shonky controls, terrible gameplay, poor graphics and an overly long main story all combine to make this game all but unplayable. Don't believe me? Read on!

The controls are just awful. When riding your bike, for example, it slews all over the road at the touch of the control stick. The boost button seems permanently mapped to the forward stick position, meaning you'll constantly set it off whilst navigating hazards on the road. Don't worry, though, because as even a non-biker like myself knows, if you run into something on a bike at speed, all that happens is that you stop. Instantly. With no damage. Oooookaaay! The melee mechanics are little better.

The gameplay is just awful. The bad controls don't help but the whole thing just doesn't work at all well. Your options boil down to one of three things. Riding your bike, shooting people or beating people up in God-awful quicktime events that take any fun out of the game. Not that there was any to begin with.

In addition to the rival bikers you have to kill there are scores of utterly innocent people you are required to slaughter for no reason whatsoever. However, they seem to have a tolerance for bullets to the chest that suggests skin made of Kevlar! Shoot 'em in the head is the quickest and most reliable way to bring them down. And trust me, after only a few of the imagination-free encounters, you'll be trying to get through every gunfight as quickly as possible just to get it over with.

The graphics are pretty poor for a modern game. In fact, the cut-scenes and characters have a similar graphical fidelity to those in Guitar Hero. Clothing pokes through skin and textures just aren't right in many places.

Likewise, the game's sound effects are just not finished. Some cut-scenes have noises missing from things like passing cars, movement and the like, which will make you think you've gone deaf at points. Add in the sudden silence that ensues when you open a menu and the general irritating repetitiveness of the in-game music in general and you have a recipe for misery.

The main story is something like 30 missions long and, quite honestly, it is far, far too long. You'll be crying for it to be over well before then.

Add in a main character that is basically a moronic ass and the game is complete. A complete mess, that is.

Oh wait! I forgot to mention the sex!

Yes, there is a number of sex-scenes in the game. Fully clothed sex scenes, but they are there. I don't mind this. But if the inclusion of the sex scenes was an attempt to make the game more "adult" then they have failed utterly! Why? Because basically the women in the game are literally just there to have sex with. You rescue some woman from a gang of rapists and what's the first thing on her mind? You guessed it! Having sex with your character. Not a little while after, either. Right there and then straight after the rescue.

Now, if this happened just the once it might be vaguely okay. But it happens several times in the game. You save a girl, she has sex with you immediately. Fully clothed, right there amidst all the bodies you've just created!

This is just insultingly juvenile. It's like a pre-teen wrote it all.

I really can't slate this "game" enough. It fails on just about every level. Deep Silver and SEGA should be ashamed that they vomited up this mess. Not only is it not finished, it is just pitifully poor in every aspect. No wonder there were no review copies before release. it isn't worth any amount of your money, not even for the "so bad it's good" brigade of gamers.

Just avoid it!
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10 of 10 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Disgusting, 4 July 2013
= Fun:1.0 out of 5 stars 
This review is from: Ride to Hell: Retribution(Xbox 360) (Video Game)
Do you see that 1% on the cover?
That's the game's score. 1/100.
One of the worst games of this generation.
Aliens: Colonial Marines looks like a masterpiece next to this.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars CRAP CRAP CRAP CRAP CRAP, 22 Aug. 2013
By 
M. Monaghan (Hinckley, Leicestershire United Kingdom) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
= Fun:1.0 out of 5 stars 
This review is from: Ride to Hell: Retribution(Xbox 360) (Video Game)
I bought this game as it was cheap. You definately get what you pay for. Please dont buy this game as i guarantee that you will be disappointed.
Bike riding is very poor.
Combat is very poor.
Storyline has nothing in it that makes you want to stick with it.

I emplore you once more, do not buy this game. Save yourselves the anger at wasting money.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars I'm a huge fan of son of anarchy. I ..., 8 July 2014
This review is from: Ride to Hell: Retribution(Xbox 360) (Video Game)
I'm a huge fan of son of anarchy. I got this game because of that. I purchased it for £2.00 from a second had game shop (CEX) and after wasting an hour playing it put it straight in the bin. So it does not appear on my game shelf. Can amazon please put an option less than 1 star.
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6 of 7 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Makes the Walking Dead FPS look like Half Life 2, 23 Aug. 2013
This review is from: Ride to Hell: Retribution(Xbox 360) (Video Game)
Other reviewers do a pretty good job of pointing out the sheer incompetence of this game (my favourite question of dozens of incredibly moronic design decisions - what sort of imbecile makes a racing game that resets you for drifting only inches off the track and thus allowing the NPC to gain an unassailable lead?)

However, so far no one has mentioned the most unintentionally hilarious aspect of the game - the "rewards" cutscenes. Whenever you save a female NPC (or sometimes even just talk to them) they instigate a brief, ahem, adult encounter that involves close ups of the badly rendered, expressionless faces in what I'm guessing is meant to be ecstasy, but actually looks like constipation. The variety of poses assumed reminds me of a similar scene in Team America, which was done deliberately to hilarious effect. Here, you can't help but get the feeling that the designers think they've made something genuinely erotic, complete with chikka-chikka music (although the women never shed any clothes, presumably because whichever myopic child did the character textures couldn't run to a second set because their mum sent them to bed early or something...)

While these sections are absolutely laugh out loud funny, please don't mistake this as a reason for buying the game. It really is the worst thing on the 360...
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8 of 9 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Awful, awful, awful!!!!, 23 July 2013
Verified Purchase(What is this?)
This review is from: Ride to Hell: Retribution(Xbox 360) (Video Game)
Awful, awful, awful!!!! Shoddy GTA and Saints Row wannabe, this handles like a rabid dog on steroids! Avoid like the plague!
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2.0 out of 5 stars So bad it's funny, worth a playthrough, 5 Feb. 2015
By 
Mr. K. T. Johnsey "kris69" (Newport) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
This review is from: Ride to Hell: Retribution(Xbox 360) (Video Game)
Even if you've got no intention of ever playing this game, I highly recommend you check out the machinima playthrough vids and the angry joe review of ride to hell, they're hysterical.

I knew enough about ride to hell to know what to expect. Rated as one of the worst games of all time, I had no intention of buying it unless I got it cheap, which I managed to do getting a 2nd hand copy I paid couple of quid for. Had I paid full price I would have been fuming and slating it completely, annoyed I'd been ripped off, but as that wasn't an issue getting it so cheap, I could just appreciate the comedy of playing this game. That's why I'm not giving it 1 star, coz ride to hell falls into the it's so bad it's funny category and I can't remember consistently cracking up throughout a game as much EVER. The fact it's not trying to be funny just further adds to the comedic value.

So the game is essentially unfinished and broken, but functional. There's so many things wrong with the gameplay that it consists of terrible combat mechanics, repetitive shooting gallery type cover battles, awful driving sections and dumb lemming type enemy ai. The design choices and glitches range from annoying to crazy hysterical. I'll list a few worthy of a mention:

hysterical fully clothed sex scenes that take place the exact moment and place you just killed the guys trying to rape the woman and yes, 1st thing she wants to do is have sex with you, sometimes without even saying anything (this happens multiple times).

standing in certain places throughout the game will have the enemies shooting but unable to hit you even without being in cover.

When you kill a bad guy on his bike, the bike speeds off and blows up, using the same stupid explosion sound. When you die you drive into the wall and blow up.

Enemies on bikes just appear then crash and die for no reason.

Enemies sometimes don't fight and instead just stand there checking the bottom of their shoes or scratching their heads lol.

talking to your allies after missions with no phone (it's set in the sixties so there were no mobiles)

graphical glitches such as hats and debris floating in mid air, a stick of lit dynamite attaching to my gun (and not exploding) and enemies shooting a tree instead of me on one level lol.

police road spikes causing health depletion rather than bike damage

Being able to powerslide your bike for hundreds of meters with barely any decelleration

the electric fence level where you steal a truck, then rather than just drive it through the fence, you drive to a nearby powerplant, kill all the workers and blow it up to cut the power WTF!!!

enemies will hide in cover and half their body sticks out making them easy targets.

shooting some enemies makes them fly off for no reason and I've seen bikes just suddenly take off into space lol

1 shot head kills and about 20 shots to the body (2 thirds of my gun kills were head shots).

during 1 of the arena fights I noticed you could front kick without getting hit once, I tested it out on the next guy and counted. 138 non stop front kicks took the guy out, he never blocked once lol.

The list goes on and while that may sound like a total nightmare and in a way it can be, I still ended up having a proper laugh playing through the 12 or so hour single campaign. The graphics aren't very good apart from the scenery and backgrounds which seem to be where all the effort and talent went. The voice acting is bad, but again it offers some comedic amusement in places. The storyline is generic and cliched, you don't really care about the characters. It is a total mess of a game, I'm not denying that. It is a bit of a challenge, even on easy, so that as something, but the main draw was getting to the next moment that made me laugh. Even the final end scene glitched out twice to the end credits and gave me a final laugh.

Is it the worst game ever, No. Is it one of the worst games ever, definitely, especially for xbox 360. BUT if you can get it for a couple of quid and just enjoy laughing at how bad it is, I assure you it will be worth your time. I bombed through it in a few days looking forward to playing it, so no way can I give it 1 star. It entertained me, I've never laughed at a game so much and I'm glad I experienced it. If you've got any doubt, watch those vids, especially the machinima one, you'll never see a group of guys laughing so much at a game. So bad it's funny, definitely.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Don't buy the game, 4 Aug. 2013
= Fun:1.0 out of 5 stars 
This review is from: Ride to Hell: Retribution(Xbox 360) (Video Game)
I've seen gameplay of it and it's dreadful don't buy it it's not worth a penny. WORST GAME EVER. The game is full of problems and it's story just doesn't make sense. It's graphics are crap and so is the voice acting.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Don't waste your money., 30 Aug. 2013
By 
L. Glover (England) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
= Fun:1.0 out of 5 stars 
This review is from: Ride to Hell: Retribution(Xbox 360) (Video Game)
I bought this hoping it would be a modern take on road rash and it has turned out to be road kill. Avoid like the plague.
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5 of 6 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Ride THROUGH hell, 30 Jun. 2013
By 
= Fun:1.0 out of 5 stars 
This review is from: Ride to Hell: Retribution(Xbox 360) (Video Game)
This game's name is rather ironically appropriate, where it differs is that this game is ride through a crappy summation OF hell. And the 1% of the box art also seems strangely appropriate too since this game deserves only 0 stars from me but since Amazon user ratings don't work that way then 1 star it will force-ably have to be!
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Ride to Hell: Retribution(Xbox 360)
Ride to Hell: Retribution(Xbox 360) by Deep Silver (Xbox 360)
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