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on 20 April 2001
Pitiful yet sinister, tyrannical yet terrified, the borderline mother is full of paradoxes which make it difficult for her children to grasp her problems, for which they inevitably blame themselves. This book explains and illustrates this devastating disorder in terms that are easy for the layman to follow. Children of mothers with BPD will feel less alone, less confused and stronger for reading this book. Dr Lawson gives methods for handling the borderline mother in her various avatars of waif, hermit, queen and witch. Though the book cannot offer a "cure", the insights it offers help to make this difficult relationship easier to endure.
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on 10 September 2003
As the child of a borderline mother, I was delighted to find a book that said what my childhood was like. This book is brilliantly written, effortlessly mixing psychological jargon with fairytale metaphors. Everyone who has a mother with borderline personality disorder should read this book, it is truly validating.
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on 28 March 2014
I have been riveted to this book since I purchased it earlier in week. I am completely blown away. It explains so much about why I am the way I am. I keep wanting to cry- tears for the pain I experienced as a child growing up with a borderline mother , and tears of joy and relief as I can finally validate my own feelings. I am the only child of single mother so I never had siblings to identify with or reassure me that I wasn't the crazy one just imagining my mother's instability. I've been through a lot of therapy over the years, and a member of 12 step programs. I have healed a lot of my demons but battle continously with self-esteem, fear and depression. Honestly, this feels like the missing piece of the puzzle. I am so so so grateful to have found this book. It feels like a life saver. It's helping me to make sense of mother and childhood. And I have greater compassion for who I am.
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on 31 July 2014
This book is the first book that I have read that accurately describes the crazyness I experienced while growing up. When I was a child I knew that my family was not the same as other families. Thanks to this book I now know why. Unlike some children of borderline mothers I didn't have a mother who was physically violent or abused drugs and alcohol. The only outward sign was a need to overeat so it was difficult to know what was wrong. This book has helped me to realise that a lot of what was expected of me was unrealistic and that it isn't my fault. I am finally letting go of the belief that I am an evil person and the need to live what feels like a double life. I thoroughly recommend this book.
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on 6 March 2011
After seeing a therapist who said I think your mother has borderline personality disorder, and assured me I wasn't crazy. I was looking for info on the internet and found this book was highly recommended. So I visited trusted Amazon, but was a little taken aback by the price! Anyway I went ahead and was so glad I did. After reading this I felt like my life fell into place, I identified my mother , myself and what to do. Clarity in a word. I ended up underlining anything that was relivent to me. Well it ended up being half the book! Even If you have a difficult mother without this disorder it may well help. It was very easy to read and I could just pick out examples and behaviours to share with my partner who was blown away. I wanted to share it with everyone my mother had convienced it was me and my partner that was bad. This book had her down to a tee. The hermit with the waif, queen and witch thrown in.
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on 8 February 2013
I cannot put into words how beneficial this book has been to me. Yes, it is pricey.....but you will read in one sitting and then you will read and read again. If your mother 'gaslights' and has never validated your life, you will feel empowered on reading this book. My relationship with my mother has always been challenging and I have walked on egg shells all of my life. On reading this, I have taken control....I've set boundaries. I understand what is wrong, I no longer think it can be me as she would have me believe. Things slot into place and it leads you on a journey that will ultimately make you stronger and more able to have a relationship with your mother with healthy boundaries that would not have seemed possible.
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on 16 November 2013
If you have difficulty living with or understanding yor mother or mother in law this book will help. Well structured and plenty of examples. A real help to understanding.
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on 18 January 2014
In one book the writer has condensed my entire childhood and adult years. This was an incredible read that helped me a great deal. Healing, powerful and really useful
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on 18 July 2013
although there are a few sweeping generalisations that irk, such as that all borderline women will have children, the book was very illuminating. The review that claimed the book was overpriced is unrealistic - how much research would have gone into a book that cost 1.99? You get what you pay for, sweetie!
My mum is a queen and i am a hermit. There were many bits where the book was amazingly accurate in describing aspects of our personalities, and I think reading it constitutes a breakthough for me.
If you think you may have this condition you really have a moral duty to read the book, if only to ensure you don't pass it on to another generation of unfortunates, expensive or not!
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on 24 November 2009
growing up in a family where the mother is actually boarderline, can be terryfying. Boarderline is a very complex behaviour pattern and children with boarderline mothers feel alone alienated from their feelings and grow up with confusion and problems. this book brings a clarity and hope to these people as they grown up trying to make sense of their thougths and feelings; Essential readling to any adult child of a dysfunctional family. there is a clarity in the way the author thinks abut the awful child hoods that children of boaderlines have. very often people growing up in such dysfunctional families just dont think anyone will believe them, and that is yet moer layers of pain and confusion. This book realy contributes to healing.
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