Top critical review
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Three parts angst, one part misunderstanding, one part yada yada
on 30 July 2012
If you loved every second of the Twilight saga, then stop reading this review immediately and go click on the `Add to Basket' button. If I know you, please let me know that you have done this, so I can cut all ties with you and publicly ostracise you.
If, however, like me you were living in constant hope that the immensely irritating lead character would die very, very soon in some very, very painful way, then you should probably avoid this book like the last kebab in the shop at closing time.
The book could have made a decent short story, but removing the long-winded and incredibly repetitive descriptions of the main protagonists' incredible beauty and perfection, and the tedious playground-level misunderstandings would have left the author with maybe one chapter's worth of material where anything actually happens.
There seems to be a formula to these types of books nowadays. Take one lonely girl / woman with amazing latent powers, who has no inkling of how amazingly beautiful she really is. Throw in an incredibly attractive boy / man with superpowers of some description, and then have the girl / woman simper along through the whole book not actually doing anything, but constantly having to be rescued by the aforementioned Captain Awesome.
There should probably be some other amazing boy / man who also likes the girl / woman, which will allow the writer to ramp up the `love triangle' angle.
Make sure that the girl / woman is appropriately laden with angst and guilt and confusion and a constant `he loves me, he loves me not' series of (really pathetic and annoying) misunderstandings so that neither party knows the other is totally in love with them.
Gradually let the girl / woman start to exhibit some of her latent powers, to everybody's great amazement. Near the end of the story, make sure she does something amazing so everyone can stand around and go, "Holy crispy crap! Did you see that? She must be... `The One'!"
Have all the misunderstandings cleared up in the last few pages so they can go off and live happily ever after - or until the sequel, when more annoying stuff happens.
Rest assured, I will be far more wary of new books recommended to me by Amazon. I've been caught out far too often lately.