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8 Reviews
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15 of 15 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A refreshing approach to tricky parenting situations, 22 Jun. 2013
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This review is from: It's OK Not to Share and Other Renegade Rules for Raising Competent and Compassionate Kids (Kindle Edition)
I bought this book when the issue of sharing came to the forefront of my toddler's life. At 2, she was the child who was most likely to have toys taken from her (without protest). That left me in a tricky situation; I didn't know how to either defend her right to have that toy without upsetting the other parent or teach my daughter how to kindly stand her ground.

I mentioned the book's ideas on 'not sharing' with my closest friend, whose son is also 2, and we practised the author's advice. We noticed immediately that it worked. The children were willing to talk to each other (we gave them the words) and respect their own agreement to take turns. And it removed all confrontation that might be felt between parents because what we were doing was getting the children to talk to each other (rather than giving out orders). Both children felt respected & safe to play with a toy until 'done'.

After that, we broached the subject to other parents who we met with, when we found that they had the same problems over sharing (when to say something, forcing your child to 'share' their toys when they weren't done to appease another parent/child etc). They were open to trying the technique but doubted their child's willingness to co-operate. They were then amazed to see their child accept the final outcome (usually without tears or frustration).

Of course, there are other topics discussed in the book, which are very interesting & offer the same level of common sense. But I bought it for the chapter on sharing & was not disappointed.
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7 of 8 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Wise and practical, 18 April 2013
This review is from: It's OK Not to Share and Other Renegade Rules for Raising Competent and Compassionate Kids (Kindle Edition)
I read this on recommendation of a like-minded friend. It is based on a respectful understanding of children as real people, with rights and feelings, but also recognising that they can't always do everything they want the way they want. It gives a framework and practical tips for keeping children safe while allowing them the freedom to be children and to learn for themselves how to interact with others in a thoughtful and respectful way. Ad it doesn't take itself too seriously, acknowledging that sometimes you need to just let it slide, or adapt your rules to sensitivities of others , or if you simply can't be bothered. Would recommend it to anyone!
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars I love this book, 23 Sept. 2013
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I really like the style of parenting advocated and this book should be read because at least you can argue for your own choices if you don't like it. It is thought provoking honest and funny.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Buy this! :), 16 Sept. 2014
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Wonderful wonderful wonderful book! Would HIGHLY recommend it for any free-thinking open-minded parents, who want to bring up their children to be kind, considerate, compassionate but not compliant :)
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3 of 4 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Not renegade should be mainstream policy in all early years childcare and homes, 29 May 2014
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Slightly undermining sub title I thought, considering that the principles and advice in this book is backed up by mainstream child development and pyschology, and road tested since the 1960s. It's a fabulous, practical, easy to read parenting goldmine. It should be handed out with the red book by health visitors after every birth and it should be taught as standard for early years teachers and preschool managers. Can't recommend highly enough.
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5.0 out of 5 stars would recommend this book to anyone interested in child development, 27 Dec. 2014
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G. montrose - See all my reviews
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This review is from: It's OK Not to Share and Other Renegade Rules for Raising Competent and Compassionate Kids (Kindle Edition)
Interesting and refreshing, would recommend this book to anyone interested in child development.
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0 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars An absolute gem if you've got a toddler or a pre-schooler at home, 18 Oct. 2014
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This review is from: It's OK Not to Share and Other Renegade Rules for Raising Competent and Compassionate Kids (Kindle Edition)
The title is obviously deliberately catchy; I cannot possibly recall how many times I have heard parents tell their toddlers "You have to share" almost always for something that cannot be "shared", such as a toy or a scooter. Do not worry: it's not OK to be selfish or territorial!
However, the book covers far more than that. It definitely is worth reading in full. The author ends each chapter with example statements to use to encourage kids to solve problems, voice their feelings with words and become more assertive and independent. There also lists of phrases to avoid, though those are commonplace. I thought those were very useful, and found in many other books. Any family who encounters communication issues would benefit from reading this.
I cannot praise this book enough, even though praise is not what it recommends :) A worthwile read for any parents or childcare providers who believe in a positive form of discipline, based on communication and problem-solving rather than punishment.
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5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars, 22 Sept. 2014
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excellent!
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