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3.4 out of 5 stars39
3.4 out of 5 stars
Format: DVD|Change
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With a title containing all the wit and wisdom of a nine year old, I kept my expectations exceedingly low, i.e. Tempe Video level. The movie is NOT a spoof on "Breaking Dawn" but rather a spoof on "Eclipse." "Breaking Dawn" is spoofed the last few minutes of the film. Breaking wind is something grossly associated with the wolves and Bella. It is overly used in the beginning of the film as well as the low brow sexual humor is excessive. There is a discussion of size of all the main characters sexual organs. "Cavernous" was used to describe Bella (Heather Ann Davis) who subscribes to "Ebony Thunder" magazine.

Edward (Eric Callero) has some issues with sex that blue pills can't help. Frank Pacheco portrays a rather portly shirtless Jacob who engages in a lot of toilet, implanting, and marking territory humor.

The overly excessive low brow humor diminishes to a tolerable level after Danny Trejo explains the story of the wolves and vampires. It is a humorous story, one I enjoyed as he confounds various movies into one tale. At this point the comedy becomes more of a real movie satire and relies less on cheap body part humor. I thought the actors played a good spoof role, although they should have done another take at the end with the child actors.

The film is supposed to be campy, and had they started with Danny Trejo or redid the gross beginning, it would easily be 4 stars. The spoof of people's dislike for Bella's repulsive character did give me some LOL moments.

As far as "Twilight" spoofs go, I would rank this above "Taintlight" but below "Vampires Suck."

F-bomb, sex spoof including oral and descriptions of gay sex, drawn human body parts, and fake male organs.
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on 21 March 2012
I watched this last night but could only stomach watching half before me and my girlfriend just HAD to turn it off.

I do not like Twilight much, But I have been watching the movies as it has grabbed me in some small way (probably just to cure boredom, more than anything, and to ponder on what the hype is all about).

There is SO MUCH material to take and twist out of the Twilight movies, and general dull characters and story lines. Which is what brought me and my girlfriend to watching this spoof. I was hoping for something somewhat clever like the Scary Movie spoof series that I watched years ago, and loved...

But I think I have found a film that is actually WORSE than Twilight and the series. I actually quite like Twilight, now, in comparison. As I've mentioned above, there was plenty of material to use with a bit of wit and intelligence and make something truly comedic.. plenty of very simple people have managed to do it thus far on the internet with pictures and memes and such... However, this movie ignores all this and, in place, just flat-out resorts to really idiotic jokes about sex and flatulence... on a pretty much CONSTANT basis.

I am no prude, and I very much love a bit of disgusting humour, but the 'jokes' in this movie sucked.. they weren't clever, there were no build ups... something about farts, talk a bit, something about granny sex, talk about, farts, plastic shlong on face, fart some more... it wasn't even a case of being a film that is so bad it's funny - it genuinely IS trying to be funny, and for that reason it really IS just rubbish.

I think the only thing that even made me crack a SLIGHT smile was the random appearance of Neytiri from Avatar and several Johnny Depp movie characters... not that they really count due to the total irrelevance. Clinging at straws, much?
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on 2 June 2013
I really wanted to like this movie I have been stoked to see it since its release but when I saw it last night on a rental I didn't enjoy it much. They focused more on being lewd and forgot their humour. I know vampires suck was hardly capable of being called clean but this was every second scene. The previous movie was more like what this was supposed to be a humorous take on Twilight more focused on poking fun at it this didn't seem to have any of that they just made it trashy.
I also wish that they had kept the original actors from Vampires suck to play the roles in this movie, that would've been better I think.
I don't know it wasn't totally unenjoyable parts of it made me smile but all in all I still prefer the first Vampires suck I've watched that a couple times and liked it so much I did want it on DVD.
Give it a go though it's probably me being cynical!
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on 9 April 2015
Oh my god, how awful is this piece of crap!!!! Like some of the other reviewers here, I got this based on the reviews saying how others found it funny!!!!!!! But no, I didn't even last 30 minutes, and this says something as i'm a big fan of immature films with fart jokes/toilet humour.

The acting is dreadful, the attempted jokes are just as bad. Just didn't think this could be as terrible as the proper twilight films but i was wrong.

I even told my dad that I wouldn't even donate this to a charity shop to spare the pain of somebody else watching this.

I don't know if this is physically possible but I somehow feel less intelligent after watching just a bit of this
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on 8 April 2013
Over the years, I've watched different parodies and loved them. I had high hopes for this but sadly, I was disappointed. Seemed like the majority of the jokes centred around farting (which I expected admittedly, given the title) and just random sex jokes.

I love twilight but I am well aware that there is a lot in it that could be made fun of and make a funny parody. Unfortunately, this lazy film is not the one to do it. The actors were good though, with the weak script they were given.
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on 28 May 2013
This movie was a complete waste of a DVD rental, we lasted 10 minutes in before laughing at how awful this movie was.

The acting is terrible, even for a spoof film.
The jokes aren't remotely funny, even for fart/sex jokes.

Those of us who had seen Twilight, and even those who hadn't, both agreed that this was the worst movie we had ever seen.

If you want to see a brainless comedy, try "Sandshark" it's far more entertaining.
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on 14 May 2012
This isnt very good, it strangles the life out of some poor jokes and the overdoing of them hails the films demise for me.
The film is crude but not ha ha crude, just desperate , aimed at a teenage audience who will snigger under their duvet.
There is nothing wrong with the acting and a good range of twilight traits have been picked up and spoofed but this is a case of drying out a wet dishcloth until its dust.
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on 9 July 2013
too rude in places for my liking borders on funny but not as funny as i thought it would be
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on 29 March 2012
Not being much of a twi-hard I must admit I was dragged to see this by my fiance, but this film genuinely exudes a strong whiff of the LOLs. It's a cracking spoof - the cast have the nailed the mannerisms of K-Stew, R-Patz, et al. And if you can't enjoy a fart joke then you're not human.
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on 3 February 2015
This was a present for my wife, who loves the books and movies. This spoof is often fairly crude, dirty and certainly for those over 16/18 really. Only a few of the scenes and jokes are really funny, mostly just alright. Very stupid and daft but fun i suppose.
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