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18 Reviews
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86 of 86 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A great ' first ' to turn to when the unimaginable happens.
This was the first book to catch my eye in the bookstore when I found myself alone after over 20 yrs. of marriage and was utterly devestated.
It became my 'bible', beside my bed. I highlighted all the bits about how to create happiness in your life, reread them constantly.
Alot of the ideas about being responsible for creating your own happiness were new to me...
Published on 13 May 2002

versus
7 of 10 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars A good book to learn how to move on after a breakup
A nice book with advices about how to move on after a breakup, and the way you'll heal. What to do to meet new people and start a new loving life.
Published on 20 Nov 2002


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86 of 86 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A great ' first ' to turn to when the unimaginable happens., 13 May 2002
By A Customer
This was the first book to catch my eye in the bookstore when I found myself alone after over 20 yrs. of marriage and was utterly devestated.
It became my 'bible', beside my bed. I highlighted all the bits about how to create happiness in your life, reread them constantly.
Alot of the ideas about being responsible for creating your own happiness were new to me and I didn't immediately understand, it took some time. The chapters on 'what went wrong' were too painful initially, but the right time came and then they made sense too. The chapters on beginning a new relationship are as yet untested!
Since that time, over 2 yrs. ago, I've gone on to read books going into much greater depth on these issues, but this first one that I turned to, and still turn to, has a special place.
It was the turning point for me to look at my life in a completely different way, at what is important for me and what my values are(not my x partner's-not always that easy to work out after a long relationship).
I highly recommend this book, it covers a wide area, from before the break-up, to step-families in the new relationship; so I think that many people would want to expand their reading after this book. But it certainly inspired me to believe that there is a future. If your partner has left, or you have left them, you can make a good life; this book can certainly set you on the path.
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38 of 38 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Exellent guide for the newly separated/divorced, 9 Oct 2001
By A Customer
Bought this book because I wanted a bit of a guide on how to deal with my two children after my husband and I divorced. He has moved about 200 miles away and I wanted some hints on how to "do it right" in relation to them being brought up in a newly single parent family. The book covers many aspects of moving on - The end of a relationship/Coming to terms with loss/What went wrong/The children/New social life/the introduction of a new partner ..... It explains how children of different ages view divorce and separation, and for those of you who do not have children I would still recommend it as it goes through many "relationship types" and how to avoid making the same mistakes again.
It is in my handbag and if I come across a problem I refer to it and it gives me confidence, comfort and courage to soldier on!
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8 of 8 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Pretty good guide to getting through seperation, 18 Dec 1999
By A Customer
There are sections on whether you really want to seperate, the grief process, becoming independent successfully and starting a new relationship. The section on 'What went wrong' really struck a chord. Best of all, the book is full of examples of real people who have gone through the pain and come out the other end. The section on self confidence was not too original but overall, this is a good read if you're still going through the mill.
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22 of 23 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A great support, 15 Feb 2002
By A Customer
I bought this book because I wanted to know that all my feelings were 'normal'. Sarah Litvinoff tells us that all those 'pinball emotions' are just that: normal!
This book gave me a lot of strength during a particularly devastating time - I thoroughly recommend it.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars The best book on relationship breakdown recovery!, 4 Jan 2010
By 
Maximilian Longhin (United Kingdom - or in the sky somewhere) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
Do yourself a favour and read it. It will enlighten you on so many aspects and will enrich your life. I have been recommending this book since it helped me get over a really difficult relationship in 1994. So many of my friends & colleagues have benefitted from this book. Best of all, Sarah Litvinoff writes in an easy to understand way: there's no unnecessary jargon nor is the text oversimplified. Well-balanced and not at all preachy, evangelical or patronising. Whether it's a straight, gay or bi relationship you're coming out of, you will gain so much from this book.
Good luck and I hope it helps you on your journey.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars should have bought this earlier!!!!, 2 Dec 2009
By 
The Auld Bat (Dundee, Scotland) - See all my reviews
This book is an excellent buy, wish I'd knowing about it earlier, before I'd split up. But hey ho onwards & upwards thanks to pointers & sugestion within this book. I reccommend everyone who's starting again to read this.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Very Insightful and Resassuring, 31 Mar 2011
By 
Jase (Staines, UK) - See all my reviews
Verified Purchase(What is this?)
This review is from: The Relate Guide To Starting Again: Learning From the Past to Give You a Better Future (Relate Relationships) (Kindle Edition)
I downloaded this as a kindle book, and found it quite reassuring given the stage in life that I'm currently at. I'm having counselling at the moment and it's helped to put some of the issues that I've been discussing into much needed context. There are many real world examples used (obviously with names changes) to illustrate almost every point made. It may be a relatively quick read, but I can see myself going through it again soon too.

The only minor comment regarding the Kindle version, is that some of the formatting around the task sections is a little awry but that doesn't detract from its' usefulness!
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12 of 14 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Support & understanding for pain/rejection at being dumped, 29 Jun 2000
By A Customer
I kept asking myself how could I go on without my love and this showed me the stages relationships move through and how not to repeat the same mistakes. Only when I read this book did I start to come to terms with being dumped - my loneliness, betrayal, lack of confidence and lack of trust. It gave me something to build on. An excellent buy.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars good read, 9 Feb 2011
A good read, especially if your going through some sort of relationship crisis and you would like to analyse what to do next.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Literally Starting Again, 19 Mar 2010
By 
C. A. Jefferson "Chris Jefferson" (Pershore, England) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
It is all about starting again a really good read for those who need a little help to know where you will find your future...
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