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18 of 18 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Useful for any kinds of problems, not just compulsions
This kind of a book title makes me wary. The joy of failure. The pleasure of cancer. The beauty of death. The tranquillity of war.

However, if one is open-minded or desperate enough to look beyond that absurd and insulting title, it becomes clear that the author actually has a very positive message: instead of fighting your compulsions, you should try to take...
Published on 29 Dec. 2009 by Printul Noptilor

versus
3.0 out of 5 stars Problem with Exercises....
I'm very happy with the content - it is thought provoking, interesting and I think it will be useful. However, be warned, when you get to the exercises you only get the first page not the whole thing. It cuts off and goes back to the main text. This is annoying and I think it's not fair for a book that is £[]+
Published on 12 Oct. 2011 by Jane


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18 of 18 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Useful for any kinds of problems, not just compulsions, 29 Dec. 2009
By 
This kind of a book title makes me wary. The joy of failure. The pleasure of cancer. The beauty of death. The tranquillity of war.

However, if one is open-minded or desperate enough to look beyond that absurd and insulting title, it becomes clear that the author actually has a very positive message: instead of fighting your compulsions, you should try to take advantage of the informations that they are giving you. Compulsions are not sicknesses that have befallen you, they're your organism's cries for help. If you, for instance, binge on ice cream, then instead of exercising your willpower to avoid eating ice cream, and beating yourself up for doing it anyway, you should find out what is the underlying problem that makes you crave ice cream. When you succeed to find that and correct it, the compulsion will disappear.

In spite of the title, the advice given in this book is not at all limited to compulsions. The author has chosen to focus on compulsions, possibly because she's been struggling with them. Her approach, though, can be applied to a wide variety of personal problems that might have nothing to do with compulsions.

The principles presented in this book, as well as inspiration from the book "Energize Your Heart", enabled me to create my own exercise which has turned out to be far more effective eliminating certain personal problems than EFT, Sedona Method or Byron Katie's "The Work".

The essential difference between those methods in this. With EFT, you ignore the problem ("I am fine even though I have so-and-so"). With Sedona Method, you throw it away (release it, let it go, drop it). With "The work", you ask what if it's not true, and imagine that actually the opposite is true. Mary O'Malley's approach, the way I understand it, is the exact opposite of Sedona Method. You don't try to chase the disturbing aspects of yourself away. You acknowledge them and make peace with them. You don't look at the compulsion (or any other problem) as an invader plaguing you. You realise that it's a manifestation of a part of you that you have been neglecting and suppressing. You acknowledge that it's an aspect of who you are, and start listening to what it wants to tell you, so it no longer has to cause you problems in order to be noticed. And it doesn't mean saying "Bingeing on ice cream is all right, that's who I am." It's realising that ice cream is not the real problem, it's only a symptom of something that's wrong in your life.

If you remember the first "Prince of Persia", there's a scene on the last level where you have to stop fighting your evil shadow. You realise that you can't kill it because every time you hit it, you lose one life point yourself too. And there is no way around him. So you eventually find the third possibility: you sheathe your sword, and you're surprised to see your shadow, who you had thought hated you and wanted to harm you, do the same. And you approach him, and he approaches you, and you re-unite, and you are free to move on.

I can't prove theoretically that Mary O'Malley's approach is better than the other methods I described. The only thing I know is that it works for me. I do it regularly whenever I notice a disturbing sensation. The only case when it doesn't work is when the sensation is too vague. In that case, I use excercise 15 from the book "Quantum Consciousness".
With those two exercises, I have already cleared away lots of bad stuff from my life, the way I was supposed to be able to do with EFT and Sedona Method.

To avoid any misunderstanding, I'd like to point out once more that the exercise is not in the book. I created it myself using ideas which Mary O'Malley presents in this book. I don't know if you will be able to do the same. But the book might be worth checking out if you are struggling with personal problems - not necessarily compulsions.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Cool.., 23 April 2010
Lead me to start accepting that my poisons could turn into medicine,
when seen in the right light.
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3.0 out of 5 stars Problem with Exercises...., 12 Oct. 2011
This review is from: The Gift of Our Compulsions: A Revolutionary Approach to Self-Acceptance and Healing (Kindle Edition)
I'm very happy with the content - it is thought provoking, interesting and I think it will be useful. However, be warned, when you get to the exercises you only get the first page not the whole thing. It cuts off and goes back to the main text. This is annoying and I think it's not fair for a book that is £[]+
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5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent, 15 Feb. 2011
This review is from: The Gift of Our Compulsions: A Revolutionary Approach to Self-Acceptance and Healing (Kindle Edition)
I agree with the other reviewer here, the title does seem a little patronising, but the content is superb. If you're tired of suffering, read this book.
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