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33,588 of 34,097 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars DO NOT PUT ON KNOB AND BOLLOCKS
Being a loose cannon who does not play by the rules the first thing I did was ignore the warning and smear this all over my knob and bollocks. The bollocks I knew and loved are gone now. In their place is a maroon coloured bag of agony which sends stabs of pain up my body every time it grazes against my thigh or an article of clothing. I am suffering so that you don't...
Published on 24 Jan. 2012 by Andrew

versus
6,096 of 6,834 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars LOCATION LOCATION LOCATION
I like the clean shaven look down in my gentleman's log cabin, so for the past few years I've used a shaver. However the hair keeps growing back which means every 6 months I have to spend 20 minutes trimming again. As I'm sure you've realise this is valuable time I cannot waste. So I decided to get to the root of the problem and purchased this product.

Probably...
Published on 17 April 2012 by The Cantankerous Tiger


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33,588 of 34,097 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars DO NOT PUT ON KNOB AND BOLLOCKS, 24 Jan. 2012
This review is from: Veet for Men Hair Removal Gel Cream 200 ml (Personal Care)
Being a loose cannon who does not play by the rules the first thing I did was ignore the warning and smear this all over my knob and bollocks. The bollocks I knew and loved are gone now. In their place is a maroon coloured bag of agony which sends stabs of pain up my body every time it grazes against my thigh or an article of clothing. I am suffering so that you don't have to. Heed my lesson. DO NOT PUT ON KNOB AND BOLLOCKS.

(I am giving this product a 5 because despite the fact that I think my bollocks might fall off, they are now completely hairless.)
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1,662 of 1,768 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Veet -- the Men's Hair Removal Gel Creme (from hell) . . ., 30 July 2012
By 
John W. Osborne Jr. "Josbo7" (St. Petersburg, FL) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
This review is from: Veet for Men Hair Removal Gel Cream 200 ml (Personal Care)
After having been told my danglies looked like an elderly rastafarian I decided to take the plunge and buy some of this as previous shaving attempts had only been mildly successful and I nearly put my back out trying to reach the more difficult bits.

Being a bit of a romantic I thought I would do the deed on the missus's birthday as a bit of a treat.I ordered it well in advance and working in the North sea I considered myself a bit above some of the characters writing the previous reviews and wrote them off as soft office types...oh my fellow sufferers how wrong I was.

I waited until the other half was tucked up in bed and after giving some vague hints about a special surprise I went down to the bathroom. Initially all went well and I applied the gel and stood waiting for something to happen. I didn't have long to wait.

At first there was a gentle warmth which in a matter of seconds was replaced by an intense burning and a feeling I can only describe as like being given a barbed wire wedgie by two people intent on hitting the ceiling with my head.

Religion hadn't featured much in my life until that night but I suddenly became willing to convert to any religion to stop the violent burning around the turd tunnel and what seemed like the destruction of the meat and two veg.

Struggling to not bite through my bottom lip I tried to wash the gel of in the sink and only succeeded in blocking the plughole with a mat of hair.Through the haze of tears I struggled out of the bathroom across the hall into the kitchen by this time walking was not really possible and I crawled the final yard to the fridge in the hope of some form of cold relief.

I yanked the freezer drawer out and found a tub of ice cream, tore the lid of and positioned it under me. The relief was fantastic but only temporary as it melted fairly quickly and the fiery stabbing soon returned.

Due to the shape of the ice cream tub I hadn't managed to give the starfish any treatment and I groped around in the draw for something else as I was sure my vision was going to fail fairly soon. I grabbed a bag of what I later found out was frozen sprouts and tore it open trying to be quiet as I did so. I took a handful of them and tried in vain to clench some between the cheeks of my arse.

This was not doing the trick as some of the gel had found it's way up the chutney channel and it felt like the space shuttle was running it's engines behind me.This was probably and hopefully the only time in my life I was going to wish there was a gay snowman in the kitchen which should give you some idea of the depths I was willing to sink to in order to ease the pain.

The only solution my pain crazed mind could come up with was to gently ease one of the sprouts where no veg had gone before.

Unfortunately, alerted by the strange grunts coming from the kitchen the other half chose that moment to come and investigate and was greeted by the sight of me, arse in the air, strawberry ice cream dripping from my bell end pushing a sprout up my arse while muttering..." Ooooh that feels good "

Understandingly this was a shock to her and she let out a scream and as I hadn't heard her come in it caused an involuntary spasm of shock in myself which resulted in the sprout being ejected at quite some speed in her direction.

I can understand that having a sprout farted against your leg at 11 at night in the kitchen probably wasn't the special surprise she was expecting and having to explain to the kids the next day what the strange hollow in the ice cream was didn't improve my status...

So to sum it up Veet removes hair, dignity and self respect....... :-
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Application was easy and quick, 10 May 2015
This review is from: Veet for Men Hair Removal Gel Cream 200 ml (Personal Care)
I've read many of these reviews and thought people were being overly dramatic. My nether regions had began to look unkempt, overgrown and unloved so rather than placing a razor edged blade near my beloved plumbs I opted for what I thought would be the danger free option. Application was easy and quick, however the cool sensation soon turned warm, hot, then to intense heat like molten magma being poured over my wrinkled gooseberries... I tried to tough it out but was soon I was gritting my teeth like the new lad on a lube free prison wing. Panic soon turned to fear when water from the tap didn't alleviate the suffering, in fact made it worse... it felt like someone was taking a hatchet to my groin... worse still the washing process had caused some of the cream to touch my purple trouser eye which soon began to feel like i'd stuffed a hot chilli down it... luke warm water was not the solution so I had to find an alternative... and there were none in the house... the only option I could think of was freezing cold water; the only place I could think of was my neighbours fish pond.... i threw my dressing gown on and rushed outside, I knew my neighbour was at work so want too concerned about being seen. The frozen water had the desired effect and within minutes i was able to get out of the fish pond without my neighbour being aware of the uninvited scrotum cooling... A few days later when my scrotum had mellowed to a light shade of beetroot my neighbour told me, as he was washing his car how all of his fish had died "because of the cold"... Mmmmm I may never know if fish are allergic to Veet but I know it hurts like hell in the japs eye... All hair now gone...
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6,096 of 6,834 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars LOCATION LOCATION LOCATION, 17 April 2012
This review is from: Veet for Men Hair Removal Gel Cream 200 ml (Personal Care)
I like the clean shaven look down in my gentleman's log cabin, so for the past few years I've used a shaver. However the hair keeps growing back which means every 6 months I have to spend 20 minutes trimming again. As I'm sure you've realise this is valuable time I cannot waste. So I decided to get to the root of the problem and purchased this product.

Probably the first thing you will notice after using this product is the pain. Although as a man I lack the required experience, I'm going to estimate that using this product is at least eleven times more painful than childbirth.
Imagine sticking a rusty razor blade into your favourite eye, before tying your hands behind your back. Then imagine that you use the entrenched razor blade to slice open a raw onion. All the while being butt naked. This product is slightly more painful than that.

However if we ignore the blinding, crippling and debilitating pain I should point out that this product is remarkably effective. Before, all manner of organisms great and small lived down there, now nothing can grow; not even on a cellular level. Sadly this includes my genitalia; I've spent the last four hours staring fixedly at Carol Vorderman's arse, all to no avail. My tinkywinkleton hasn't even so much as perked up, so if my review seems a bit harsh, it's only because I wanted children.

In summary:

Pros: A small expense, certainly didn't burn a hole in my pocket.

Cons: Did burn a hole in my scrotum

All in all an effective and reasonably priced product - 3 Stars.
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17 of 19 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars The opening scene from Shaving Private Ryan, 2 May 2012
By 
A. Sharratt - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
This review is from: Veet for Men Hair Removal Gel Cream 200 ml (Personal Care)
Have decided to do a written review as opposed to the video version.

Stephen and The Twins have suffered for many years from subtropical conditions, and naturally this discomfort has driven me to distraction. Formerly, I would have to make do with regular blasts of an air compressor, but such equipment has been troublesome to keep with me. Having been refused admission on a Ryanair flight to Bruges, I decided my bat's ears required drastic chemicular action.

Step forward Veet! While the application proved to be mildly uncomfortable, I was discharged from hospital within four days and am now blessed with smooth and silky nether regions. True, my rear loader looks like something found in the Co-op's vegetable counter, and my clockweights are favourites to win the Turner Prize, but one gives with one hand, and takes with the other.

Rumours that Veet are in league with Basque separatist groups are unfounded. I am delighted with this product, and would recommend to all consumers.

Bill Clinton
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695 of 787 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars good product, 15 April 2012
This review is from: Veet for Men Hair Removal Gel Cream 200 ml (Personal Care)
Makes my farts sound louder. The hair must have acted as a interlocking silencer.. I give this the big thumbs up. 5/5
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2,645 of 2,999 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Good results at first interrogation, 25 April 2012
By 
This review is from: Veet for Men Hair Removal Gel Cream 200 ml (Personal Care)
Excellent product. Most prisoners confessed within five minutes of the first application. Can recommend.

Yours,
Ali Muhabarakah,
Secret Police, Damascus
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354 of 401 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Please dilute before use, 20 April 2012
By 
D. Hayes - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
This review is from: Veet for Men Hair Removal Gel Cream 200 ml (Personal Care)
I recommend diluting before use. Personally I diluted it with Deep Heat and Oven Cleaner and the resulting pain in my balls was far more bearable. Do NOT get this stuff on your bell-end.
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346 of 392 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars OMG!! So so funny!, 27 April 2012
This review is from: Veet for Men Hair Removal Gel Cream 200 ml (Personal Care)
This was the most fantastic product ever invented due to the hilarity it has produced for all us women!! Most definitely THE funniest reviews EVER!!!!!
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41 of 46 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Great gift for that hard to buy for man ..., 28 Dec. 2012
Verified Purchase(What is this?)
This review is from: Veet for Men Hair Removal Gel Cream 200 ml (Personal Care)
Was looking for a gift for my ex husband. Based on the wealth of feedback here it seemed to fit the bill perfectly and I suspect the 12 year wall of silence will soon be broken. It's my bosses birthday soon ...
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