Top critical review
3 people found this helpful
Anti-climactic and slower than an arthritic snail...
on 4 January 2005
This movie's deeply disappointing. Unfortunately the film's creators deemed it necessary to remove more or less everything that made the first couple of Puppet Master movies great (i.e knowingly bad acting, great animatronics and creative gore action) and replace it with sub-Eastenders level acting, puppets on sticks and cut-aways every time someone's about to get it. Dealing with the first problem, the acting. Let's face it, saying I watch Puppet Master for the acting would be like saying I watch Jason flicks for Kane Hodders tortured performance. I watch them for crazy living puppets and mental death sequences. However, the acting in Puppet Master 1 and 2 was really hammy in a tongue in cheek fashion, whereas in Curse the acting is just plain rubbish. This would be ok if the movie had a high bodycount, heavy action or great effects but you're forced to watch these shmucks muddle through supposed 'meaningful' dialogue about 'real social issues'(Meaningful in the same way the aforementioned Eastenders is. If Americans knew what 'You SLAAAYGGG!' meant, it would have been in this script somewhere.) and garbage like that for 55 MINUTES of a 74 minute film. Only if you manage this torturous task will you get to see any Puppet-based craziness, and this is deeply compromised. Some of the gore in Puppet Master 1 is still to this day pretty nasty. The gore in Curse WOULD be nasty if it was actually shown to us (there's one scene that is still pretty bad in it's implications despite the editing) but it's really anti-climactic, as the directors have elected to cut off shot or to people's faces the moment anything violent happens. I'm not a gore-hound but it strikes me that in an 18 certificate horror movie, you could afford to perhaps not butcher the atmosphere so badly. It's almost like Full Moon were pushing for a PG-13(12A over here in blighty) but didn't remove enough so still wound up with a high certificate. Also, the previously fully animatronic Puppets have been reduced to being pushed across the floor on sticks just off screen. Which is pitiful. Even Deep Freeze managed to afford motion on the weird bug things, and that is far lower budget than this. So in conclusion even if you've seen Puppet Master 1 and 2 and liked them, I'd still avoid this like the plague, because I love those films and I still found this movie hard not to stop watching out of sheer boredom. On that note, I'll also nail the final nail in it's coffin, this is Puppet Master 7. What the hell happened to 3 through 6? Customs? Electrical failure? Ninjas? Another blow to UK Horror fans. This movie doesn't suck, as it's still a Puppet Master flick, and the Puppets are still cool as hell even with this mauling, but it is boring, and it's certainly a rental, not a buy. Oh, and if you're not a dyed in the wool horror nut, I'd dodge it entirely, because this has NOTHING to offer people who have a fringe interest in the genre. Buy/Rent it if you're running out of Horror movies you haven't seen, but if you've not seen a Puppet Master film, start with 1 or 2, because they're funny, reasonably fast-paced and filled with OTT action and gore. Whereas this is like watching a really bad Outer Limits Episode. And pay no attention to the 18 certificate. Buffy the Vampire Slayer is both more scary and more violent. Let that be the last word.