And I stood upon the shoreline of the swamp and I saw a bald-headed Beast arise from the period-practice sludge, having far too many recordings to his name and upon his forehead was the name of blasphemy.
And the Beast which I saw was like unto a headless chicken, and his feet were as the feet of a three-legged dog, and his mouth as the mouth of an earthworm: and the Red Label Dragon gave him his power and his seat and great authority until it realised he was a prankster and shipped him off to Hanssler.
And I saw one of his heads as it were wounded to death by the dismal reviews; and his deadly wound was healed and he re-recorded the Bruckner Third Bruckner: Symphony No. 3: and all the world wondered after the Beast and how anyone could continue to underwrite his dribble.
And they mocked the Red Label Dragon which gave power unto the Beast: and they taunted the Beast, saying, Who is like unto the Beast? Who is able to listen to his inane, Speedy Gonzales, vibrato-less ways in Bruckner?
And there was given unto him a mouth speaking great things in a pipsqueak voice and blasphemies; and power was given unto him to continue until even Hanssler cast him forth into the darkness.