Top positive review
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A parallel purpose
on 8 August 2009
I first heard of this book from an audio cd. Seminar leader David DeAngelo, demonstrated how to use Mind Lines to shatter limiting beliefs, and strengthen inner game, and how it worked for him.
Later an nlp student asked me to install the idea from this book, EXTERNAL BEHAVIOR = INTERNAL STATE. He waxed so lyrically about Michael Hall and Mindlines, I determined to read it.
Ostensibly it's about the art of reframing conversations using the 26 techniques in this book.
What happens though, as you read, and apply the Mind-lines to yourself, you come up with new ones and you may notice your own mind starts to open up, you look at things in new ways, and you can find inspiring answers, and shifts in perception.
Here is an example with reframes:
"Your being late means you don't care." External behavior (lateness)= Internal State (don't care).
Reflect back: Have you ever been late for something, and did it mean you didn't care?
Counter example: If I was on time would that prove that I did care?
Contrast: Just because someone is on time doesn't mean they care. Just because somenone's late doesn't mean they don't care.
Meta Model, Chunking down: How specifically, does my being late mean I don't care?
Mind Reading: How do you know I don't care? Are you able to read my mind?
Authority frame: According to who? Where is it written that lateness means not caring?
Value: What's more important, my being here, or my being late?
Allness: What would it be like if everyone was always late? Would it mean that no one cares, ever?
You do need to have good rapport with some reframes. And there are 18 more than this. The patterns I have used most to change my own thoughts have been negation, future pacing and metaphor patterns. More recently, I am using chunking up questions.
If you're like me, you'll discover yourself coming up with your own reframes for common situations, whether it be in career, personal relationships, dealing with children, or dealing with difficult or uncooperative people, and as you do you will realise the rewards of reexamining these situations. The more you open up to the opportunities these reframes present, the more opportunities open up.
I hope you find this review helpful.