on 28 November 2013
Psychologist Steven Stosny's latest book is just superb. Each sentence is concise and profound, no waffle just luminous clarity.
He explains why intimate betrayal can be so damaging to every aspect of your psyche and how such trauma can hijack your life; how we can wallow for months or years in pain and grief, resentment and blame, embracing a victim mentality.
But thankfully Dr Stosny doesn't leave us in a pit of despair. He gives us all hope and a clear practical path to recovery and reclaiming self-worth and empowerment.
I have read countless relationship books however Dr Stosny's books, based on pioneering research and years of dedicated clinical work, stand out as the very best and most insightful and helpful guidance to becoming a better person so you can have the compassionate, loving relationships you long for.
I recommend this book with all my heart.
on 8 October 2015
If you are suffering after a betrayal, please get this book. Have you been reading stuff that suggests that you are responsible for the betrayal in the first place, for your partner's recovery and of course for your own? I have read dozens of self-help books to try to get myself past a period of deep depression after discovering my husband's serial infidelity. This is the only one that really has the focus of healing yourself, whatever you decide to do regarding going or staying, and it never encourages you to believe that you were to blame. There are many practical exercises that will build your self esteem by harnessing and replacing the pain, resentment and hurtful images that crowd your mind, instead of expecting you to put them aside or suppress them. It is the only book I have read that explains why you feel the need to go over and over it, sometimes digging out details that inflict even greater pain on yourself - yes, it explains why you do that and you realise that you are not mad or abnormal, even if it feels like it. As with all mental re-wiring of this kind, it does require effort and commitment, but it gently and kindly eases the pain and it certainly will do no harm.